Thesis Sp.Com. 1995 H3651
c.2
Harsh, Lynda S.
Implications of
neuro-linguistic
1995.

IMPLICATIONS OF NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING AND
WILLIAM GLASSER’S REALITY THERAPY IN SUPERIORSUBORDINATE COMMUNICATION: A MANAGERIAL
COMMUNICATION MODEL

Lynda S. Marsh
April 25,1995
Thesis Submission
for Masters of Communication Completion

■ &b c !

We certify that this document fulfills the thesis
requirements for the
Master of Arts in Communication Studies

iD.

Dr. Terry Warburton

^ At /£*?£
Professor Dennis Lutz

TABLE OF CONTENTS
PAGES
3-7

I. Introduction
1. Abstract

3

2. Research Problem

4

3. Definition of Terms

5-7

II. Review of Literature

8-58

III. Research- Content and Conceptual Analysis

59-106

IV. Discussion

107-115

V. References

116-123

Appendix Section 1- Reality Therapy and Control Theory
Diagrams, Charts, and Counseling Evaluation Sheets

Appendix Section 2- Neuro-Linguistic Programming
Diagrams, Charts, and PRS Testing Instrument

\

1. ABSTRACT
The purpose of this study is to identify, select, and analyze techniques,
methods, and principles in Neuro-linguistic Programming, Reality Therapy, and
Control Theory that can be employed for improving superior-subordinate
communication. A content analysis of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Reality
Therapy, and Control Theory along with a conceptual analysis on what the
implications of these programs and principals are for managerial communication is
undertaken.
The Neuro-linguistic Programming techniques of Mirroring and Matching,
Pacing and Leading, Modeling, Association Shifts, PEGASUS, Outcome
Matching, and the Meta Model of Linguistics is examined for their implications in
managerial communication. Also, this research examine Reality Therapy's four
basic steps of self-discoveiy along with Control Theory principles for their
appropriateness and possible applications for managerial communication. The goal
of this thesis to examine these outlined theories for application in a practical
managerial communication model that provides managers with concrete methods
and ideas that can be used in their everyday communication interactions with their
subordinates.

2. RESEARCH PROBLEM
Numerous researchers in many disciplines are concerned with organizational
effectiveness. In particular, the superior-subordinate relationship and its effect on
the overall organization are under scrutiny (Schnake et al, 1990). An aspect
believed to affect this relationship is the perceived quality of downward
communication (Jablin, 1979). The problem is how to identify and implement
effective managerial communication practices designed for improving superiorsubordinate communication.
This thesis identifies, selects and synthesizes techniques and methods found
in Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Reality Therapy that can be utilized for
improving the perceived quality of superior-subordinate communication. The
purpose is to create a practical model designed to help managers improve this
perceived quality of downward communication and achieve better rapport with
their subordinates.

3. DEFINITION OF IMPORTANT TERMS
1. Authoritarian Organizational Culture is characterized by restrictive control
of employee behavior, where innovation is stifled, departments operate as separate
fiefdoms, employees fear their supervisors, and decisions are made centrally by the
dominant coalition (Gonring, 1991, p. 40).
2. Boss-Management practices involve the boss setting the tasks and standards
without consulting his or her employees. The boss tells rather than shows the
worker what to do. The boss-manager does not involve the worker in work
inspection. When faced with employee resistance, the boss-manager uses coecion
or punishment to get the worker to do what they are told (Glasser, 1994, p. 11).
3. Control Theory states that everything we think, do and feel is generated by
what happens inside of us. We are an internal control system. We must learn to
function in a manner that will fulfill our needs in order to achieve a success
identity. Our total behaviors that work to fulfill our needs contain the four
elements of feeling, doing, thinking and physiological (Glasser, 1984, p.1-3).
4. Downward Communication is communication from supervisor to subordinate
as job instructions, job rationale, organizational procedure and practices, feedback
about subordinate performance, and indoctrination of goals (Katz & Kahn, 1950,
p. 139).
5. Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a model of communication that
t

focuses on identifying and using patterns in the thought process that influence
people's verbal and non-verbal behavior as the means of improving the quality and
effectiveness of their communication (Dilts, 1982, p.l).

6. Openness in superior-subordinate communication can be distinguished:
openness in message sending and openness in message receiving. Openness in
message sending is the candid disclosure of feelings, or 'bad news', and important
company facts, whereas openness in message receiving involves encouraging, or at
least permitting, the frank expression of views divergent from one's own;' the
willingness to listen to 'bad news' or discomforting information (Jablin, 1979,
P.1203).
7. Participative Organizational Culture is characterized by teamwork, and
shared power and decision-making, with work being guided by common goals and
the organization as a whole open to new ideas (Gonring, 1991, p.40).
8. Lead-Managers encourage worker input by engaging in on-going honest
discussions about how to improve work quality at lower costs. Lead-managers
model the job so that the worker who is to do the job can see exactly what die
manager expects. Lead-managers eliminate most inspectors and inspections
because they teach their workers how to evaluate their own work for quality. The
lead-manager continually teaches the worker that the essence of quality is constant
improvement. Lead-managers believe that their main job is being a facilitator,
which means he or she is doing all he or she can to provide the worker with the
best tools possible as well as creating a friendly and noncoercive atmosphere to
work in (Glasser, 1994, p. 14-16).
9. Reality Therapy is a system of ideas that help lead people toward gaining
control of their lives by making more effective choices, in order to gain a success
identity. The steps in Reality Therapy are based on the principles stated in Control
Theory (Glasser, 1982, p.73).

10. Responsibility is a concept basic to Reality Therapy and is defined as the
ability to fulfill one's needs, and to do so in a way that does not deprive others of
the ability to fulfill their needs (Glasser, 1965, p.15).
11. Superior-subordinate communication is superior-subordinate exchanges of
information between organizational members in which the superior has formal
authority to direct and evaluate at least some of die subordinate's activities in the
organization creating upward and downward channels of communication (Jablin,
1979, p. 1202).

7

n. REVIEW OF LITERATURE
The correlation between the quality of the superior-subordinate relationship
and their organization's overall effectiveness has been under investigation by
numerous researchers. Schnake, Dumler, Cochran and Barnett (1990) examined
die studies of Perter & Roberts, 1976; Down, 1977; Bacon, 1980; O'Reilly &
Anderson, 1980; Goldhaber, 1983; Pincus, 1985; Penley & Hawkins, 1985;
Harrison, 1985; and Berman & Hellweg, 1989. These studies report finding a
positive association between the quality of die organization's communication and
employee performance and estimation ofjob satisfaction (1990, p. 38).
Studies indicate that between 50-90% of a manager's time is spent in
communication and a large portion of these managerial communications being
face-to-face interactions with their employees (Schnake et al, 1990). In the light of
these findings, it is not surprising that bridging the gap between superiors and
subordinates is an important issue. The positive two-way communication
relationship between superiors and subordinates may be the vehicle that can win
back die loyalty of the work (Smith, 1990).

Method and Analysis

The purpose of this study is to explore the implications of specific
techniques and methods in Reality Therapy and Neuro-Linguistic Programming
that provide a practical framework tiiat managers can utilize for improving their
subordinate communication relationship. This researcher chose to examine NeuroLinguistic Programming, Reality Therapy, and Control Theory because each of

8

these disciplines focus on the idea of subjective reality. This presupposition, that
reality is subjective, encourages subordinates to develop more of an internal locus
of control. This internal locus of control gives subordinates other possibilities or
empowers them in changing their circumstances, actions, and perceptions so that
they may find more successful ways to achieve their goals and needs. This research
explores how managers, by assisting their employees gain more of an internal
locus of control, could improve their communication relationship and goals.
This study examines the Neuro-Linguistic Programming techniques of
Mirroring and Matching, Pacing and Leading, Modeling, Association Shifts,
PEGASUS, Outcome Matching, and die Meta Model of Linguistics for their
implications in managerial communication. In addition, this study explores how
managers can utilize principles and practices of Reality Therapy and Control
Theory methods and principles in their everyday communications with their
employees.
Methods for this research are content and conceptual analysis. The sources
of data used for analysis in this study are from:
1. Literature explaining and illustrating Reality Therapy's purpose,
principles, structure, and procedures
2. Literature describing RT clients who have changed their failure identity to
a success identity as the result of being guided by a Reality Therapy practitioner
3. Literature disclaiming the effectiveness of Reality Therapy and Control
Theory postulates
4. Literature explaining and illustrating Neuro-Linguistic Programming’s
purpose, principles, structure, and procedures

9

4. Literature explaining and illustrating Neuro-Linguistic Programming's
purpose, principles, structure, and procedures
5. Literature disclaiming the effectiveness of Neuro-Linguistic Programming
techniques and methods for achieving communications goals
4. Literature describing behavioral changes in persons who have
implemented Neuro-Linguistic Programming techniques
5. Literature illustrating Reality Therapy (may be referred to as
Responsibility Training) implications in quality and lead-management practices
6. Literature reporting on Neuro-Linguistic Programming practices used in
business communication.
This above stated data is first examined for those practices that apply to the
content categories. Then, those selected practices are sorted into the appropriate
content category. Finally, after each content category, the conceptual analysis
discusses the implications of each practice for managerial communication. These
instruments of analysis (content and conceptual analysis) were chosen because of
examples seen in other similar research (Strom, 1974). This previous research uses
Glassefs Reality Therapy to create a trainer role behavioral model for Participation
Training. This Trainer Role Model Program's outcome also created a practical
model intended for job training use.
Content analysis is the examination of an entity to distinguish its components
(elements, concepts, or events) by the process of setting forth categories that
identify classes of events and indicators that measure various states of affairs in
these events. The categories used in this content analysis of Neuro-Linguistic

10

Programming and Reality Therapy are the five conditions for quality in our
organizations proposed by Glasser in his 1994 book, The Control Theory Manager.
These content analysis categories are:
1. The work environment must be warm and supportive. The workers must
trust the managers.
2. Since quality is always useful, workers should only be asked to do useful
work and should be encouraged to contribute to the usefulness of what is
being done.
3. Workers are asked to do the best they can do.
4. From the time the workers are hired, lead managers will guide the
process of helping them learn to continually evaluate their work. Then,
based on this on-going self-evaluation, lead managers will encourage
workers to improve the quality of what they do.
5. Quality work always feels good (p. 18-26).
The conceptual analysis of NLP, RT, and Control Theory examines how
those selected techniques and methods are applicable for superior-subordinate
communication functions. Conceptual analysis is a reasoned judgment by an
individual as to the relationship and nature between various parts, elements,
concepts or events that constitute a larger entity. Techniques and methods found in
both models for achieving different communication goals (such as developing
greater rapport with subordinates, helping subordinates identify and rectify less
effective job practices, improving subordinate's job quality, increasing
subordinate's estimates of perceived understanding, creating an environment that
encourages subordinate feedback and job innovation, assisting subordinates to

11

Issues of reliability and validity are difficult to assess in this type of
qualitative study. This researcher addresses the issue of reliability and validity by
triangulating the data with several sources including reviewing a diverse selection
of literature and studies of NLP and RT done by authors working in different
fields and applications.

Superior-Subordinate Communication
Hie superior-subordinate relationship exists in most purposeful
organizations. According to Jablin (1979), "superior-subordinate communication
is limited to those exchanges of information and influence between organizational
members, [when] at least one of whom has formal (as defined by official
organizational sources) authority to direct and evaluate die activities of other
organizational members (p. 1201)."
Katz and Kahn (1966) have identified five basic types of downward
communication. These are job instructions, job rationales, organizational
procedures and practices, feedback messages about subordinate performances,
and indoctrination of goals. Upward communication or subordinate-to-superior
messages contain information about the subordinate and related problems,
information need on organizational practices and policies, and feedback on what
needs to be done and how it can be done (Jablin, 1979).
Effective managerial communication and competence are closely
linked. Brownell (1991) suggests that the success of managers in die everyday

12

activities of motivating, influencing, delegating, and coaching increases their
communication effectiveness. She also maintains that superiors who communicate
effectively, as perceived by their subordinates, share information and provide clear
sufficient messages.
Jablin examined prior studies on the superior-subordinate communication
relationship and found that "employees are more satisfied with their job when
openness of communication exists between subordinate and superior (1979, p.
1203)." Openness in superior-subordinate communication contains two
components: openness in message sending and openness in message receiving.
Openness in message sending is the candid disclosure of feelings, even if this is
construed as bad news, and important organizational facts, policies and
procedures. Openness in message receiving indicates a willingness to hear these
frank disclosures or views that are different from the ones held by the message
sender (Jablin, 1979).
Another aspect of superior-subordinate communication is the occurrence of
perceptual differences between managers and employees. These perceptual
differences are evident in the differences of perceived frequency and adequacy of
message sending and receiving between superiors and subordinates. Studies have
shown that managers often feel that they provide more opportunity for employees
to state their task-related opinions than employees perceive exist. This is especially
prevalent in die area of performance feedback, with managers believing that they
conduct more regular feedback sessions than their employees feel that they are
receiving.

13

More recently, Schnake, Dumler, Cochran and Barnett (1990) observed 923
managers and 4,708 subordinates working in a large communication-related
corporation. Part of their purpose was to examine the effects of perceptual
congruence on job satisfaction, work motivation, and subordinate's perception of
other variables concerning their job. Results of tiris study indicate that the lack of
perceptual congruence between superiors and their subordinates is negatively
related with the subordinate's reports ofjob satisfaction (1990, p. 460). They
maintain, as Jablin (1979) has suggested, that confusion and ambiguity from
perceptual incongruence may contribute to employee's lack of motivation.
Moreover, Likert and Seashore (1963) maintain that the subordinate's
estimate of self-worth develops when these subordinates consider their
supervisor's communication to be supportive. Gorden and Infante (1987) also
examined the effects of supportive or affirming communication practices by a
superior. An affirming communicator gives both positive verbal and nonverbal
messages, along with low verbally aggressive mannerisms. Superior
argumentativeness, when combined with an affirming style, provides the climate
for encouraging subordinate free speech. Freedom to state personal feelings,
opinions, and estimations consequently foster a more positive self-concept for
subordinates (Infante & Gorden, 1991).
Another cause of lower subordinate morale is when there is a large
semantic distance between superior and subordinates. A typical example of
superior-subordinate semantic difference is when management overestimates the
amount of information that their employees actually possess on a given subject
(Jablin, 1979). The reluctance of managers in explaining die reasons behind their

14

decisions, along with the lack of concrete information, can cause a semantic
distance between them and their employees.
Cahn (1986) examines the relationship between perceived understanding,
superior-subordinate communication, and organizational effectiveness. This study
involves three midwestem universities and 224 students. These students were
given situation where they tried to make themselves understood and in turn felt
understood, along with opposite actions and feelings of being misunderstood,
when they communicated. Both feelings of being understood and misunderstood
were tested by the Cahn and Shulman's Perception of Being Understood Scale
(PBU) and the Perception of Being Misunderstood Scale (MPBU).
Results of this study indicate that certain teacher communication behaviors
contributed to the student's estimation of perceived understanding. These
communication behaviors are both verbal and nonverbal and indicated a willing
and interested listener, such as direct eye contact, effective questioning techniques
for illiciting student opinions, and communicating a relaxed manner. This teacherstudent relationship is an instance of superior-subordinate communication.
According to Cahn (1986), "These findings suggest that in at least some
organizations certain supervisor communication behaviors may make subordinates
feel more understood (p.24)."
In addition, die relationship between stress and communication in die
organization was examined for its effect on employee job satisfaction. King (1986)
studies the interaction between communication and employee stress both within
and outside die work environment. She observed that communication can effect,
mediate, or prevent die effect of stress on employees. The stronger effect on

15

depression and personal well-being is when the employee has relational or
communication problems rather than life-event problems. Communication
strategies aimed at preventing or mediating stress not only minimize work-related
stress but other types of stress as well (p.32).
These communication strategies for preventing or mediating stress include
encouraging employee self-awareness, fortuitous personnel planning, and
developing supportive relationships between boss and employee. The
organization's challenge for helping preventing job-related stress is to encourage
two-way information flow, invite stressor-norm identification, examine decision­
making policies and procedures along with recommending reassignments when
necessary. The effective individual communication skills, such as those involved in
resolving conflicts, influencing others, assertively achieving communication goals,
are mediators for the immediate harmful effects of employee stress (King, 1986).
To summarize, employees have reported greater job satisfaction when:
1. They feel understood by their superiors.
2. Their superiors have an affirming and argumentative style.
3. Hie employees feel that perceptual congruence exists between
them and their superiors.
4. There is little semantic difference in the communication
relationship.
5. The organizations and superiors mediate stressors felt by the
employee by developing a supportive, open, assertive, and
problem-solving environment.

16

One of the recourses that the organizations have for achieving these
conditions is to provide communication training for their managers. Connor
(1991) proposes that most corporations are lacking in managerial training designed
for the expressed purposes of developing open communication behaviors, where
managers learn to facilitate rather than mandate. This facilitation role requires
managers to exhibit similar traits and attitudes commonly found in coaches,
counselors, and teachers. The William M. Mercer Consulting Firm has discovered
the importance of managerial communication from a survey entitled, "The Delta
Organization of 33 Leading U.S. Corporations." The results of this survey
indicates that "managers at all levels will need to be increasingly more adept at
motivating, team building, and facilitating. These communication-related 'people
skills' may become as much a predicator of managerial success as are the
manager's technical skills (Connor, 1991, p.34). Also, effective managerial training
requires the organization's commitment of time, effort, and resources.
Organizational Culture

Besides being influenced by his or her immediate superiors, the larger
organizational culture also exerts a great influence on employee's perceptions,
attitudes, behaviors, and estimations ofjob satisfaction. Every organization has its
own specific culture. Even though researchers from the different communication
paradigms, functionalism, interpretism, systems, and critical theorists, disagree for
the most part about how to study and what defines an organizational culture, they
do agree that organizational cultures have certain universal characteristics. These

17

characteristics are that an organizational culture is a learned phenomenon among
members, with members sharing values, symbols, meaning, beliefs, assumptions,
and expectations (Schall, 1983).
For the functional theorist, an organizational culture is something an
organization "has" or is defined by a set of observable characteristics.
Functionalism usually explores how to develop, change, and control an
organizational culture for maximizing the organization's effectiveness. For the
functionalist theorist, managerial control over the observable features of the
organization, such as the goals, practices, language, orientation programs, and
rituals are the key to maximizing organizational effectiveness (Daniels & Spiker,
1991).
This functionalist perspective, by looking at the structural features of the
organization, works at defining the organizational culture. By observing and
researching the organization's formal ideology, informal rites, stories, and rituals,
functionalists can examine whether the organizational has a strong or weak culture.
A strong organizational culture exists, from this paradigm, when organizational
members know the rales or how to behave. Also, members in a strong culture
understand and commit to its organization's goals. The converse is true for a weak
organizational culture. From this functionalist perspective, a weak organizational
culture contains fragmented subcultures who follow their own agendas.
On the other hand, a theorist working from the interpretist paradigm
maintains that the description of an organizational culture is specific to that
organization. From this point of view, an organization culture is not something an
organization "lias," but something an organization "is." The interpretist paradigm,

18

along with the systems perspective, believe that an organization's culture evolves
through the interactions of its members. Instead of observing an organizational
culture as being strong or weak, interpretists study die interactions among
members and describe organizations as being either "tightly coupled" or "loosely
coupled." "Tightly coupled" systems are organizations whose subsystems or
subcultures have a high degree of interdependence. The "loosely coupled"
organization is one whose members have few common ties. Organizations can also
have combinations of both levels of interdependence (Weick, 1976).
Pacanowsky and O'Donell, interpretist researchers, maintain that an
organizational culture is die collection of the cultural performances of its
members. These shared meanings among members are created, maintained, and
changed through die day-to-day interactions or performances of die members.
Therefore, Pacanowsky and O'Donnell (1983) argue that "[organizational] reality is
brought 'to life' in communicative performances (p.131)." Organizational
performances are distinct events that give the performer identity in the
organization. These organizational performances exist in personal, task, social, and
organizational ritual contexts.
Interpretists study organizational culture through the interplay between the
organization's dominant culture and its various subcultures. Because of the
dynamics that create and define a culture, the interpretisfs view about changing an
organizational culture is different from the functionalist. For a functionalist
theorist, organizational change is possible through die actions of a symbolic
manger who provides new direction and acts on the structure of die organization.
Conversely, interpretists maintain diat an organizational culture can not be

19

changed by such a simple cause-and-eflfect relationship between a symbolic
manager or leader and the sanctions or changes he or she may impose. Because of
their beliefs that the organizational culture is the product of the interaction among
members who create the patterns of significance, interpretists oppose this
functionalist idea of change. The interpretist notion of change involves the voices
of die collective unconscious or subcultures in die organization joining together to
create a force for change. The impetus for change may be a great external force
such as economic survival for the organization, a historical or larger cultural force,
conditions within die organization no longer tolerated by most members, or may
be a combination of influences exerted on the organization. Because of the
homeostasis tendency of the organizational culture to resist change, this force or
influence for change exerted on the organization usually is powerful. This
interpretist idea of change is similar to a grassroots movement with a small
number of subcultures reacting to this force for change by joining together and
interacting with other subcultures, who over time create movement toward change.
According to system theorists, how change affects an organization is also
determined by die interaction of its members. The level of interdependence among
members greatiy affects how members perceive and deal with change. In a "loose
coupled" organization, die ripple effect of change is gradual or limited in scope.
Therefore, these "loosely coupled" systems allow for more local adaptation and
when a new situation arises, die affected area can adapt without involving the
entire organization (Weick, 1976).
Some types of organizational cultures seem to foster the development of
open communication relationships between superiors and subordinates more than

20

others. An authoritarian organizational culture's climate is one where strict control
of employee behavior is needed, innovation is stifled, departments act as if they are
separate kingdoms, decisions handed down from the top does not inspiring loyalty,
and, subsequently, fear is predominate between supervisors and employees.
Glasser (1994) defines this type of organizational culture as a boss-managed
culture.
Participative management cultures seem to encourage opposite products
from authoritarian cultures such as teamwork characterized by shared power and
decision-making along with work being guided by common goals. In a
participative organizational culture, the climate is more conducive to new ideas
and innovations (Gonring, 1991, p.40). The implication is that the organization
with a participative organizational culture is more effective (Smith, 1990). Glasser
(1994) defines this type of organizational culture as a lead-managed culture. He
maintains that die practices found in this type of culture are necessary for creating
employees who are responsible for producing quality work.
In conclusion, interpretist and functionalist theorists view the issue about
how an organizational culture can be changed differenfly. The interpretist's
concepts of organizational culture have a large bearing on the reception of
introducing new or changing managerial communication patterns. According to an
interpretist researcher, wheflier or not training programs, such as fliis managerial
communication model, can effect change depends on the particular context or
pattern of interactions in a given organization. Therefore, with tiiis viewpoint in
mind, this researcher does not propose that by implementing the following
managerial communication model, change will necessarily result. However,

21

organizations, whose cultures are open to such changes or organizations who have
more autonomous subcultures, may benefit from the practices outlined in this
thesis.

Control Theory
Glasser (1984) explains why the Reality Therapy (RT) techniques work,
when done successfully, with his systematic model of Control Theory (CT). This
foundation of RT, Control Theory, states that everything we think, do, and feel is
because of what happens inside of us (refer to Appendix 1 for Control Theory and
Reality Therapy diagrams and worksheets). We are an internal control system. We
must leam to function in a manner that will fulfill our needs in order to achieve a
success identity (1984, p. 1-3).
Control Theory (CT) maintains that our basic needs are the powerful forces
that drive us. These needs are the: need to survive and reproduce, need for love
and to belong, need for power, need for fun, and need for freedom. The CT basic
principle is that all of our behaviors are need fulfilling behaviors. In order to
attempt to gain effective control of our lives, we have to leam how to fulfill the
needs that are basic to us and not the needs that others think we should attend to.
The fundamental assumption of CT is that we carry around a personal
picture album inside us. This personal picture album contains images of what will
specifically satisfy our needs. Glasser also maintains that we carry around at least
one picture for every need. The problem, Glasser has warned, is that often the

22

pictures in our head are impossible to fulfill in this world. Glasser (1984)
speculates that if wishes were horses then you would see beggars riding.
Glasser (1984) maintains that all behavior is total behavior. The four
components of total behavior are acting, thinking, feeling, and physiology. To
explain this concept, Glasser uses the analogy of a front-wheel drive car. The front
wheels are the thinking and acting components and die back wheels represent the
feeling and physiological components of the total behavior, the car. The idea of
this front wheel drive car analogy is that we do not have direct control over the
back wheels or the feeling and physiology components of the total behavior, but
we do have control over the acting and thinking components, front wheels of the
car. Changing the acting and/or thinking components, as suggested by the car
analogy, changes the total behavior because all components are interrelated.
Glasser (1984) proposes that "because we always have control over the doing
[acting] component of our behavior, if we markedly change that component, we
can not avoid changing the thinking, feeling and physiological components (p.51)."
Glasser (1984) also maintains that we are responsible for what we choose to
do with any personal picture we create. Need fulfilling is a creative process. If we
are unable or unwilling to use the acting and thinking components of our total
behavior to fulfill our needs, sooner or later the physiological component of our
behavior will attempt to gain control. This physiological part of our behavior
usually causes our bodies to act out in pain. Glasser describes these types of
behaviors in CT language, illustrating the physical malady in the verb form of the
noun. An example of this in CT language is that we are head aching instead of
having a headache.

23

Another damaging behavior about which Glasser warns is criticism (1994,
p.95). We must guard ourselves from criticism and not try to control others
through criticism. The only way to possibly influence others, CT theory proposes,
is through persuasion and by matching the images in our personal picture albums
or defining common values. Glasser warns that even if the comment is intended to
be constructive, criticism is always construed as criticism by the person receiving
it. This idea of criticism is not the practice of self-evaluation, but is die act of
focusing on the negative. Moreover, there is a severe loss of control associated
with all criticism. The worst type of criticism is self-criticism. By engaging in selfcriticism, we create a chasm, between what we are now and what we want for
ourselves, that renders us powerless. Glasser (1994) proposes that when the
situation calls for constructive criticism, the focus of the comments should be on
what actions will achieve a better result and not on blaming the individual. This is
an especially beneficial approach when employers are dealing with employees. If
the employer has the foresight to suggest that the problem lies in a plan of action
and not the employee dremselves, the employer has the chance of gaining the
cooperation and motivation of the employee to work on the problem's solution.
Control Theory is the mechanism by which we can make sense of how we
order our world and how we can change our world. Understanding that we do
have control allows us to use the techniques presented in Reality Therapy to help
us achieve or gain more success in our life.

24

Reality Therapy
Reality Therapy, developed by Glasser in 1965, is a systematic of way
helping people, especially those who identify with failure, leam ways to gain a
success identity (Glasser, 1982, p. 73). The RT methods are for helping people
gain confidence and develop alternatives to better handle the stresses in their life.
The cornerstone of RT is involvement. The successful person, whether she
or he is an employer, teacher, therapist, or a parent, needs to become involved
with the person that she or he is trying to help. Preconditions of involvement are
the establishment of a warm, friendly, personal relationship. Involvement means
simply that one must give the other the time of day. If the RT practitioner can't
gain involvement, he or she will have failed to successfully practice RT.
Involvement is also necessary in organizations. Employees need
involvement with their employer. Furthermore, Glasser declares that many
businesses fail because this employer-employee involvement broke down (Glasser,
1994).
Reality Therapy teaches people the four how's. The four how's are:
1. How to look at what you want.
2. How to look at what you are doing.
3. How to evaluate your behavior.
4. How to make realistic plans for achieving your goals.
Glasser (1965) emphasizes that his Reality Therapy (RT) principles can be
used by anyone who wants to create and to help others create and maintain success
identities. These principles are also useful in the employer and employee

25

relationship (Glasser, 1994). As one tries to live these practices for a better happier
life, one will also be helping the people around him or her.
Glasser (1965) further maintains that the helping person needs to be honest.
She or he must never promise more time than they can give. This honesty is
essential, Glasser asserts, for developing trust between the RT practitioner and
client. The impact of whatever time is available for this personal involvement is
magnified because of the amount of concentration and exclusive attention the RT
recipient receives. What a world it would be if our employers, teachers, and
parents would give even one uninterrupted hour a week devoted entirely to the one
they want to help (Glasser, 1965).
Self examination of needs and behaviors
The first two how's in RT is the need to be aware of what you want, need,
and how your total behavior is attempting to fulfill these needs. These steps are
mandatory, for you cannot learn how to change your total behavior without
knowing what you are doing now. This examination of current behavior is best
accomplished as analytically as possible by focusing on the acting and thinking
components more than the feeling component (refer to pg. 13). How a person acts
is always in his or her control, while what the person thinks may not always be in
his or her control. For example, thoughts can just pop into a person's mind with the
person reinforcing die thought the more they focus on the thought to get rid of it.
This is the reason why Glasser maintains that gaining control is best accomplished
through the acting component of the person's total behavior.

26

Is what you are doing now working?
After the examination of current behavior, the RT client needs to evaluate
the effectiveness of his or her current total behavior in fulfilling their needs. By
critically judging her or his total behavioral choices, she or he can decide whether
or not their current behaviors are successful. Successful people leam to judge their
total behaviors and have the ability to perceive better choices when they are
available (Glasser, 1965).
Devise a new plan of action
Once the RT practitioner assists his or her client perceive that there are
better choices for action, he or she implements the next step in RT, formulating a
new plan of action. This plan of action must be flexible and concrete. This
flexibility will allow the RT client to adjust and readjust if necessary until arriving
at a workable course of action.
The six steps for formulating a workable plan involve:
1. Create a simple plan with uncomplicated small steps within reach for the
RT client.
2. Define these steps in the plan very specifically: what is to be done, how
he or she can do this plan, what time frame does this plan encompass.
3. Make a plan that outlines positive actions rather avoiding negative
actions.
4. Compose this plan for repetitive actions, or something he or she can do
on a regular basis for reinforcing new behaviors.
5. Create a plan that only requires the actions of the RT client and is not
dependent on other people.

27

6. Create the plan so that it can be implemented immediately not some
future date.
After formulating a plan, the client must commit to his or her self and the
RT practitioner for carrying out this prescribed plan. This verbal and/or written
commitment on the part of the RT client needs reinforcement by the RT
practitioner. The RT practitioner must never accept any excuses from the client. If
the client fails with this plan, then he or she devises another course of action. The
client repeats this process until she or he creates a workable and more effective
plan of action. To help with the process of implementing the plan of action the RT
leader must use praise and not punishment. Glasser (1980) emphasizes, that since
"punishment reduces involvement and causes people to identify more securely
with their failure, we must learn not to use it. We must eliminate punishment as a
major weapon of government and institutions, families and marriages, social and
individual relationships. Giving praise for a job well done instead of rejection for a
job below expectations will motivate people toward success (p.102)."
Reality Therapy Research

RT research studies examine RT practices and principles in psychotherapy
field, criminal justice, education, and business. Banmen (1982) reports on the
mixed results of these studies in the educational system. Browning's 1979 study
measured the effect of RT classroom management techniques on student and
teacher attitudes along with student behavior and achievement. The results of these
assessments show significant and positive changes in both teachers and students.

28

Teachers reported attitude changes towards how to effectively discipline students.
In turn, students responded that they have a more favorable attitude about the
school environment. Also found was an increase in these student's grade point
averages.
Other variables tested with students, who were exposed to RT practices,
were the effects of RT on short-term and long-term development of self-concept.
Dakoske's 1977 study found an increase in the positive reports of self-concept
immediately following RT exposure. However, when tested a year later, results
show no significant difference between this experimental group and the control
group (Banmen, 1982). These studies through 1982 on the effect of RT and
changes in student's self-concept, attitudes, and achievement show mixed results.
However, all but one of these studies shows that RT does reduce discipline
problems and inappropriate behaviors (Banmen, 1982).
Bruce's (1986) study on the effectiveness of RT as a management strategy
used The Computer Consultant Model (TCC). Developed by Dickey in 1984, the
TCC purports to provide a valid and reliable way to analyze and interrelate
relationships and to calculate the probability of such relationships occurring when
certain conditions occur. This descriptive computer model is interactive where the
employee selects the conditions and identifies the relationship of each condition to
another. Along with these employee estimations, this model incorporated
corresponding responses by managers trained in RT. Her results showed that RT
provided the manager with a tool for assisting the problem employee to plan a way
to change behavior (p. 24).

29

Critics of Reality Therapy question the validity of RT because there are few
long-term research studies of RT. Obviously, there is a need for more empirical
evidence for RT. In response to the difficulty of obtaining empirical data for RT,
Glasser explains that RT is hard to measure. The reason that RT is hard to measure
is because RT's success is dependent on the client's willingness to commit to its
principles (Banmen, 1982).

Neuro-Linguistic Programming
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a meta-model of human behavior
and communication developed by Bandler and Grinder in the 1970's. NLP is a
highly structured, eclectic theory that combines humanistic, communication,
behavioral and cognitive theories. The purpose of this meta model is congruent
with tire basic functions of a meta model construct, an explanation that allows one
to see and even predict how tilings will go in the future (Hall, 1976).
NLP is concerned with perceiving, identifying and utilizing certain aspects
of the communication process that is not normally in our conscious awareness
(Bandler & Grinder, 1975). The practice of NLP is observing the way our
individual and social constructs filter our perceptions of the world, so we may
better communicate, predict and influence those whom we interact with (refer to
Appendix 2 for NLP diagrams and worksheets). NLP training is for helping an
individual to be more flexible, more responsive to the environment and more
aware of personal choices (Duncan, Koefal & Spechler, 1990).

30

Bandler and Grinder's theory contain a wide range of techniques and
methods designed for gathering information for influencing personal change and
rapport building (Betts, 1988). The NLP methods and techniques that this study
examines are Meta Model of Linguistics, Matching and Mirroring through
primary representational systems and nonverbal indicators, Association Shifts,
Modeling, Pacing and Leading, Matching Outcomes, and PEGSUS. Though NLP
practitioners use a number of other methods, the methods discussed are more
basic and, this researcher feels, can be more easily incorporated in the superiorsubordinate relationship.
Formally, NLP is defined as:
"Neuro" (derived from the Greek "neuron" for nerve)
stands for the fundamental tenet that all behavior is the result of
neurological processes. "Linguistic" (derived from the Latin
"lingua" for language) indicates that neural processes are
represented, ordered and sequenced into models and strategies
through language and communication systems. "Programming"
refers to die process of organizing the components of a system
(sensory representations) to achieve specific outcomes (Dilts,
1982, p. 3).
The NLP theory states that the world we perceive is a subjective reality
affected by one's deep structures and surface structures. The surface structure (SS)
is die verbal and nonverbal manifestation of an individual's deep structure.
Whereas, the deep structure (DS) is the linguistic representation of that experience
in the person's mind. A person's DS is the linguistic model of his or her world.

31

Communication theorists also propose the existence of deep and surface structures
in the mind. Hankramer and Sag (1976), in their information processing research,
maintain that die interpretive information process has two structures, deep and
surface. Badzinski and Gill (1994) also believe that message comprehension is the
interplay of these two levels. The surface structures are the syntactic properties of
words, sounds, and language structure. Whereas, die deep structure represents the
underlying semantic process, which is the person's framework that filters and
interprets incoming information.
NLP examines the person's surface structures, or their language, for
uncovering the underlying deep structures. When an individual's interpretations of
die world are influencing him or her to form a negative estimation about his or her
self and their abilities, NLP methods attempt to expose the individual to different
possibilities for consideration.
The foundation of NLP is that people experience the world by processing
this information perceived through tiieir own unique sensory systems. Therefore, a
person's reality is a subjective reality. We are able to communicate because of a
consensus reality, where similarities in the neurological mechanisms within each of
us create similar representations of shared social and cultural experiences (Lewis
and Pucelek, 1990). Even tiiough tiiere is a consensus reality, individual
interpretations still differ. Hence, NLP is based on die concept tiiat the "map is not
the territory."
This concept that the "map is not the territory" is the basis for the works of
Korzybski. Korzybski's (1933) conclusion is that people do mistake the "map for
the territory." Korzybski (1951) also theorizes that the words are not the same as

32

the thing itself, "Whatever we may say something 'is,' is not the 'something' on the
silent levels ( p.26)." Moreover, Vygotsky (1962) concludes that:
the relation of thought to word is not a thing but a
process, continual movement back and forth from
thought to word and word to thought (p. 125).
This basic presumption underlies the NLP ascertain that our verbal and
nonverbal behaviors both indicate our subjective reality and in turn influence it.
Again, Korzybski (1951) expresses this same idea that thought is not merely the
expression of words but may owe their existence to them, "All our 'feelings,'
'thinkings,' our 'loves,' hales,' ect., happen on silent un-speakable levels, but may
be affected by die verbal levels by a continuing interplay (p. 27)."
Also, the theory of Linguistic Relativity, or the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis,
states that the very structure or language influences thought and that the way
people speak indicates die way people think. Language influence on thought is still
being debated. More recentiy, Hunt and Agnoli (1991) examined this hypothesis.
They argue that the reason for the controversy about the theory on Linguistic
Relativity is because barriers for empirical studies exist due to the illusive nature
of thought. The question here is, how can you accurately measure this concept
with reasonable reliability. In response to this problem, Russell and White (1993)
in their article, "Linguistic Virtual Reality: Is there no way out?", focus on the
implications of Language Relativity. In this article, Russell and White argue that
this idea of the language we create as having more power over us than the directiy
perceivable world has serious implications. NLP techniques and methods work
with this idea to assist the communication partner in examining his or her

33

perceived choices through tire process of evaluating assumptions revealed through
his or her language choices.
This constructivist view of self-identity formation and pragmatic
comprehension of reality as displayed through language, with language providing a
framework for interpretation, is currently being researched. Ellis (1994) suggests
that linguistic devices and grammatical structures are communication genres and
frameworks for interpretation. His definition of pragmatic comprehension is that
tiie individual's understanding and processing of reality is a subjective experience,
with the individual assigning meaning to utterances. Similarly, Luna (1976)
claims, "Words-tiie basic linguistic units-carry not only meaning but also the
fundamental units of consciousness reflecting the external order ( p. 9)." Hare
(1994) also maintains that a person's self-identity is revealed through the indexical
properties of communication. In other words, Hare believes, we display our
personhood in the ways we talk
Meta Model of Linguistics
The NLP practitioner utilizes both of these concepts, our communication
reveals and influences our self-identity, for helping people work toward personal
change. NLP techniques help people change their models or maps of the world by
learning new ways to communicate their experiences. The NLP method for
assisting others through examination of language choices is the Meta Model of
Linguistics. NLP's Meta Model of Linguistics works with how the brain processes
an individual's experiences and examines those subsequent linguistic indicators

34

that are detrimental to the person's estimation of self and their abilities. This NLP
technique works with Korzybski's' (1951) idea that:
An awareness of the processes of abstracting clarifies the structure of a
great many of our interpersonal difficulties, which may become trivial or
non existent if we become conscious of the identifications involved. Selfmade problems often turn out to be no problems (p. 29).
Therefore, in order to understand how the Meta Model of Linguistics works,
it is necessary to at look the mechanisms of the brain employed in processing
information. Chomsky (1972) postulates that
We can thus distinguish the surface structure of the sentence, the
organization into categories and phrases that is directly
associated with the physical signal, from the underlying deep
structures and phrases but with more abstract character (p.28).
These two are related, says Chomsky, by certain formal operations known as
grammatical transformations that include the processes of generalization, deletion,
and distortion.
Bandler and Grinder (1975) also explain that the brain's processes for
information receiving and storing are generalization, deletion, and distortion.
1. Generalization is when we leam new behaviors by assimilating bits
and pieces of old behavior that are similar. This promotes rapid assimilation.
2. Deletion is the process in which the brain deletes incoming
information that contain either redundant, contradictory, or extraneous
information.

35

3. Distortion is the mechanism by which we alter our perceptions.
This process allows us to take information and arrange it into something that is
non-existent.
Other researchers have also studied these neuro-mechanisms. Bad/inski and
Gill (1994) maintain that new information consistent with what we already know
or have experienced will be comprehended more quickly. This observation is
similar to the NLP neuro-mechanism of generalization. Shannon and Weaver in
their information theory also identify this mechanism of deletion (Infante, Rancer
& Womack, 1993). Their information theory states that redundant messages
contain little or no information for the mind to process. Therefore, the brain has a
tendency to delete such messages. For example, consider the following statement:
Paris in the
the spring.
One tends to delete the extra "the" in the sentence. Another example is when the
person faces two conflicting messages and for the sake of comfort deletes or does
not recognize one of these messages.
These mental processes can have either positive or negative effects (Lewis
& Pucelek, 1990). For instance, generalization helps us to assimilate new
information faster. However, generalization can negatively influence our present
perceptions. When we base understanding new perceptions on past learning or
experiences, we can unconsciously reinforce negative beliefs that may or may not
be applicable any more. For example, a bad experience with a dog in your
childhood gave you die fear of all dogs. The generalization of this past fear
influences all new encounters with dogs.

36

Deletion can positively aid us because it allows us to focus our attention by
enabling us to disregard nonrevelant data. When the mind deletes conflicting
cognition, die person feels relief from tension caused by this conflict. However, the
deletion of messages that can help us perceive something in a different way can
negatively reinforce old perceptions that were detrimental to our concept of self.
Distortion, on die positive side, helps us to visualize, daydream and plan for
the future. However, this process can translate imagined negative perceptions into
feelings, sounds, and pictures that become very real to the brain. For example, a
woman walking down the dark alley becomes anxious as she visualizes a mugger
around the next comer. The closer she gets to the comer, the more her heart races,
throat tightens, and palms sweat. In this case, the mind and body are reacting to
this distortion as if it were really happening.
Duncan (1992) reports that an important function of NLP is to assist the
NLP client in uncovering the presence and subsequent effects of generalization,
deletion, and distortion, when these processes interfere with his or her selfactualization.
The process of the Meta Model of Linguistics involves, first of all, the NLP
practitioner identifying those elements in a person's surface structure or language
that indicate that the person has negatively incorporated information through
generalization, deletion, or distortion. The Meta Model of Linguistics gathers
information, expands the limits of the person's perceptions, and gives opportunity
for the discovery of new meanings. The NLP practitioner uses transformational
grammar cues of deletion, lack of referential indexes, non-specific verbs,

37

nominalizations, modal operators, universal qualifiers, cause-effect chains, mind
reading indications and lost performatives (Gray, 1991).
This Model uses a dialectic approach to rhetorically present and persuade
the individual to discover other ways of communicating and perceiving which is
more beneficial to them. The rhetorical method, which dates back to Aristotle,
involves the speaker using examples to assist listeners in recalling universals that
they already accept or use incomplete deductive forms to cause die listener to
perform the desired deductive inferences (Arnold & Bowers, 1984). NLP does not
aim to resolve personal ethical problems, but strives to give better quality
information so that a person can have more flexibility and make better choices for
them (Harris, 1992).
Information gathering techniques involves asking the person who, what,
where, when, how and why specifically. Transformational grammar cues of
deletion and generalizations are uncovered by fliis process.
Deletion and Generalization:
Statement- "I'm depressed, I'm always depressed."
NLP agent- "What are you specifically depressed about?"
"Are there times when you don't feel
depressed?"
An unspecified referential index refers to when the speaker uses a noun or a
noun phrase that doesn't name a specific thing such as this, that, and it.
Deletion:
Statement- "I just can't deal with this."

38

NLP agent- "What, specifically, can't you deal with?
Why do you feel that way?"
Unspecified verbs are types of transformational grammar cues that indicate
generalization. Unspecified verbs are verbs that over-generalize a specific action
or feeling.
Generalization:
Statement- "She doesn't like me."
NLP agent- "How, specifically, did she show you
that she doesn't like you?"
Modal operators are words that imply necessity by using such words and
phrases as have to, must, got to, need to and should.
Changing Meanings of Distortions:
Statement- "I have to put up with my mother-in-laws
insults."
NLP agent- "What would happen if you didn't
tolerate her insults?"
Universal Qualifiers are words that imply something is unchanging by using
such words as never and always.
Changing Meanings of Distortions:
Statement- "They always talk about me behind my
back."
NLP agent- "Everyone? Always?"
Cause-effect chains are reflected in fire assumptions that something else
makes one act in a certain manner.

39

Changing Meaning of Distortions:
Statement- "She made me mad!"
NLP agent- "Why, specifically did you chose to react
with anger?"
A mind-reading incidence, seen in transformational grammar cues, indicates
that one knows what the other person is thinking or feeling without verifying it
with them first.
Changing Meanings of Distortions:
Statement- "He thinks I'm stupid."
NLP agent- "How do you know that?"
A lost performative refers to the judgment, belief or standard expressed by
the speaker as being a judgment or belief that is imposed on them by an
unidentified outside source.
Changing Meanings of Distortions:
Statement- "That was a dumb thing to do."
NLP agent- "Dumb, according to whom?"
Hus model uses language to change meanings, expand pre-conceived
limits, and aid in the recognition that one has control over his or her interpretations
and reactions.

Rapport Building

A main goal of NLP is to achieve communication rapport. NLP does this
through matching Primary Representation Systems (PRS), or the dominant sense

40

we lose to process our experiences, and other nonverbal displays. NLP proposes
that even though we use all our senses while experiencing the world, we tend to
unconsciously process our experiences through one sense more frequently. These
senses are our visual, auditory, kinesthetic (feeling), and olfactory (smell). Bandler
and Grinder (1975) maintain that in our culture die main processing senses people
use are visual, auditory, and kinesthetic. The sense that the person predominately
utilizes is the Primary Representational System (PRS). When we encounter new
information and situations, especially in times of heightened emotion such as stress
and anxiety, we tend to rely more heavily on our PRS to process our experiences.
The person with a visual PRS stores and encodes his or her experiences as
visual memories or pictures. Whereas, the person with an auditory PRS recalls and
learns mainly from hearing messages. This person retrieves information by playing
back the tape recorder in her or his mind. Similarly, the person with a kinesthetic
PRS uses their feelings to make sense of their experiences and to store new
information.
The way a NLP practitioner identifies his or her communication partner's
PRS is through the language choices and nonverbal indicators of the
communication partner. The goal of NLP is to determine the person's PRS and
then match this PRS by using the same representational predicates when he or she
communicates. This rapport building facilitates other NLP techniques along with
any other communication goals a person may have (Bandler & Grinder, 1975).
The easiest way to pick out what framework a person is most comfortable
with is through observing her or his predicate choices. Certain predicates or verbs,

41

adverbs, nouns and adjectives indicate what corresponding PRS is being utilized.
Examples of indicative predicates are:
VISUAL PREDICATES
...I see
...Your view is
...Show me
...This area looks gray to me
AUDITORY PREDICATES
...I hear what you are saying
...Your sounding like
...It sounds to me
...That sounds pretty clear
KINESTHETIC PREDICATES
...That feels right to me
...Are you in touch
...You're feeling
.. .Put me in touch with what you mean
...It doesn't feel right to me
Though all of these predicates can be in use in a person's language, Brooks
(1991) suggests that the use of specific representational systems in a specific order
is a part of a person's mental plan or strategy that was developed in their beginning
years. Furthermore, he maintains that though we may change our strategies
occasionally, our basic plan tends to remain constant over time. An example of
person PRS strategic is as follows:

42

CUSTOMER; Actually I bought our first system, a plain
word processor, a while back. Great machine, but
obviously limited in its applications. It didn't give us
enough power. When you sat down at the keyboard you
didn't get the feeling it could do the job fast enough. I kind
of knew that when I first laid eves on the thing, but I didn't
know a whole lot about computers then, and I just said to
myself "There's only one way to learn," so I bought it. It
served us okay (p. 160).
The predicates "power," "feeling," and "fast" represent a kinesthetic PRS, where
the phrase "laid my eyes" on shows a visual PRS. Finally this customer ends his
statement with an indication of die auditory PRS, "I said to myself." This person's
PRS strategy is predominately kinesthetic with secondary visual and tertiary
auditory processing schemes.
Obviously, it takes a great deal of practice and listening skills for uncovering
the person's exact representational system schemata. However, even if you just
communicate with the person's predominate PRS, rapport building will be
facilitated (Brooks, 1991).
Using this model of locating representational predicates, the NLP PRS Bias
Test helps one identify and communicate in the PRS of the person they are
interacting with (refer to Appendix 2, for Primary Representational System Bias
Test). The presumption of NLP is when both people share the same map of the
territory, rapport between communication partners increases.

43

Along with matching the PRS predicates, NLP technique of mirroring works
on building rapport by matching the other person's nonverbals such as body
postures and movements. The objective is to indiscreetly mirror the other person in
a similar manner. Bandler and Grinder especially caution that one doesn't mock the
other person. A remedy for this is to slightly delay the mirroring back of similar
gestures and body positions. In addition to mirroring body movements, tire NLP
practitioner also mirrors the other’s vocal qualities such as using similar tones,
volume, pitch, speed and cadence (Brooks, 1991).
Bandler and Grinder also claim that careful observations of the other
person's eye movements indicate what PRS the person is operating from. NLP eye
accessing cues indicates when a person is using a particular representational
system. A visual remembered image (Vr), or when one is picturing something
from the past, is seen when one looks up and to the left. Looking up and to the
right signifies a visual constructed (Vc) image or when one is picturing something
that hasn't happened yet. The eye accessing cue for an auditory remembered (Ar)
thought is looking level and to the left. Conversely, the cue for an auditory
constructed (Vc) thought is looking level and to the right. When one is engaging in
an internal dialogue, or an internal auditory (Ai) drought, the eyes are looking
down and to the left. The last eye accessing cue is down and to the right that
represent when someone is accessing his or her emotions or kinesthetic state.
Because of the effect of right and left-handed dominance on brain development,
Bandler and Grinder warn that in left handed people these cues may be reversed.
The key is to coordinate these eye accessing cues with the person's PRS predicates.

44

Ekman and Friesen (1969) with their studies of kinesics also propose that
nonverbal movements contain certain meanings that indicate how the person is
processing and interpreting the communication. These nonverbal displays are
intrinsic cues that are primarily innate in the person. Just as language reflects the
person's internal deep structure, nonverbals also gives us clues to the internal
processing. NLP works with observing these nonverbals along with the language
choices in die communication interaction for piecing together a picture of the
communication partner's "map of the territory."
Communication theorist H. Giles also maintains that matching or acting
similar to another increases rapport between interactants. In Giles' Speech
Accommodation Theory (1987), he postulates that communicators who seem to
copy speech or accommodate his or her communication partner causes increased
social identity and bonding. This principle of convergence is usually out of
awareness, maintains Giles. In Bandler and Grinder's theory, this accommodation
is a conscious choice by the NLP practitioner for rapport building.
Burke, in his Identification Theory, explains identification is conducive for
persuasion or success in communication goals. Burke (1962) states,
You persuade a man only in so far as you can talk his
language by speech, gesture, tonality, image, attitude and
idea. In short, identifying your ways with his (p. 25).
This identification process is a rhetorical technique for aiding one's communication
goals.
Infante (1978) observed that a person feels more attracted to and trust an
other more when she or he perceives this other person as being similar her or his

45

self. This approach to nonverbal communication, as a means for persuasion, is
nonverbal response matching (Infante, 1988). This nonverbal matching conveys
the message that I understand how you are and I like being that way myself.
Research studies observing successful salesmen report evidence for this
phenomenon.
Most of the empirical research on rapport building through use of NLP's
matching methods is in the psychology field with interviewers using NLP
techniques. These studies have reported mixed results on the validity of achieving
rapport through PRS predicate matching. Falzett's (1981) study used 24 female
volunteers in which the interviewers either matched or did not match their PRS
predicates. Predicate choices in verbal reports and displays of eye accessing cues
determined the PRS's of the subjects. Their results showed that the eye accessing
cue more accurately indicated which PRS the person was using. Falzett's
observations of predicates in verbal reports were found to be misleading because
the interviewers had interpreted some predicates of sensory systems to be in use
where in actuality the subjects were utilizing another sense. The individual's
predicate choice is the output map of the internal PRS. NLP issues caution to the
practitioner, who utilizes this technique; this output may not accurately reflect the
internal model. For instance the phrase, "I felt backed into the comer" indicates a
kinesthetic predicate. The internal representation of this is can also be a visual PRS
with the individual picturing himself backed into the comer. Falzett (1981) did find
that when die interviewer matched the subject's PRS, through evaluation of eye
accessing cues, the levels of perceived trustworthiness increased.

46

Hammer (1983) also report finding that tracking and matching certain
aspects of the subjects' language produced perceptions of increased empathy with
their interviewers. In addition, Shobin (1980), Feiden (1981) and Schmedlen,
McCormick and Woldt (1987) interpret their empirical studies as supporting the
idea that systematic matching, versus mismatching, the subject's sensory predicates
improve their perception of the empathic component of rapport with the
interviewer or therapist.
Other researchers have questioned the validity of the NLP/PRS construct.
Studies done by Gumm, Walker and Day (1982) determined that by varying the
assessment method (verbal analysis, eye accessing cues observations and self
report analysis) in a given subject, effected which sensory representational system
this given subject displayed. They concluded that each assessment method chosen
corresponded to a particular sensory representation display. For example, many of
their subject's verbal reports indicated that they were operating out of a kinesthetic
PRS while their eye accessing movements showed otherwise. Owen (1977)
examined this same question and reported significant agreement between verbal
discourse displays and indicative eye accessing cues. However, he didn't find
significant agreement in self reports, for indication of the person's PRS.
The question is whether past NLP studies are revealing non-supportive data
or is NLP an untestable theory. Researcher's Einspruch and Froman (1985)
reviewed 39 empirical studies on NLP. They examined each of these study's
research design's assumptions along with issues of validity. Most of the research
they found was on matching or mismatching of an individual's PRS and its effect

47

on rapport building. They maintain that most of the research done on NLP has
inherent design errors. These postulated design errors are:
1. Lack of understanding of the concepts of pattern recognition and
inadequate control of context. These researchers in their attempts to isolate the
verbal component from eye accessing cues without considering context has failed
to understand Bandler and Grinder's model. It is quite common for a person to
spend most of his or her time accessing (by eye movements) one representational
system while speaking in another. Interpreting what PRS a person is accessing by
evaluating language choices, eye accessing cues, along with verifying observations
with the particular context, is an important skill of a NLP practitioner. For
example, in the study done by Gumm, Walker, and Day (1982) participants
answered self-report questionnaires about what they thought their primary
representational systems were. Next, these participants, secured in a head device,
answered questions probing for specific PRS's. These researchers used the
restraining device to aid in rating the subject's eye movements. The design of this
study obviously ignores context and structure of normal communication.
Einspruch and Forman cite the studies of Beale (1980/1981), Birholtz (1981),
Cole-Hitchock (1980), Fromme and Daniell (1984), Hernandez (1981), Johannsen
(1982), Kraft (1982), Lange (1980/1981), Mattan (1980/1981), Owens
(1977/1978), Radosta (1982), Shaw (1977/1978), Talone (1983), Thomason,
Arbuckle and Cady (1980) and Gumm, Walker, and Day (1982) as having the
design error of lack of understanding of the concepts of pattern recognition and
inadequate control of context.

48

2. Failure to understand NLP as an approach to therapy that is
generative in nature that makes use of the dialectic in order to lay a foundation for
the client to move forward is another design error. A number of researchers such
as Hammer (1983), Allen (1982), Atwater (1983), Ellickson (1983), Hagstrom
(1981/1982), Haynie (1982/1983) and Wilimek (1979/1980), Einspmch and
Froman contend, fail to consider context in their research designs by forcing
context to fit their research. For instance, in the study done by Hammer (1983)
interviews were simulations of counseling situations. Thus, this researcher
contrived the context of the session rather than test a true counseling session,
which explores individual's subjective realities through the progression of
discourse.
3. Failure to understand the Meta Model of Linguistics is also an
observed design error. Einspruch and Forman interpreted the works of Ellickson
(1983), Frieden (1981) and Pantin (1982). Einspruch and Forman believe that the
constructs these studies measure are not true measurements of the NLP model.
These particular studies measured the levels of particular abstractions which
Bandler and Grinder call nominalizafions. An example of this error is the research
done by Ellickson (1983) where interviewers asked subjects to rate their
perceptions about the interviewer’s qualities of empathy, ease, anxiety, and
hostility. Bandler and Grinder’s Meta Model of Linguistics states that the NLP
practitioner uses these perceived qualities to understand how the other person
transforms his or her experience in his or her deep structures. Therefore, these
nominalizafions of empathy, ease, anxiety, and hostility, according to NLP, are

49

products of the individual's construct system and do not represent a tangible thing
for universal evaluation.
4. Inadequate NLP training for the interviewers is used in many of
these empirical studies. Because of the complex nature of identifying a person's
PRS accurately, elemental design flaws from inadequate training are inherent in
several studies. An example of this design error, claim Einspruch and Froman, is
the Dowd and Hingst's study (1983). These researchers used master's level
students for interviewers. In this study, the interviewers received four 90-minute
training sessions on NLP techniques. Because of the complex nature of NLP,
mastery over the skills needed to establish rapport involves more time and practice
than was given to these students, maintains Einspruch and Forman. In order to
establish rapport, die interviewer strives not only match representational systems
but also endeavors to match other nonverbal cues given by their subjects. An
interviewer may match one aspect and not another. This mis-matching affects the
level or existence of any rapport generated by the interaction. Einspruch and
Forman cite die studies of Appel (1983), Brockman (1980/1981), Cody (1983),
Dorn (1983b), Dowd and Petty (1982), Ehrmantraut (1983), Falzett (1981), Green
(1979/1981), Hammer (1983) and Paxton (1980/1981) as containing this design
error.
Einspruch and Forman maintain that "Neuro-Linguistic Programming is an
extraordinarily complex model of human cognition and behavior and of how to
identify and interpret these patterns in a deliberate way so as to achieve a
predictable outcome (p. 594)." They concluded from their analysis of the research
done on NLP that it is impossible to eitiier approve or disapprove the validity of

50

the NLP model. In conclusion, they proclaim a need for further empirical work
that correctly measures the constructs contained in the NLP model.
More recently, Konefal and Duncan (1992) measured trait anxiety levels
and the degree of internal control achieved after utilizing NLP techniques. They
found a significant decrease in trait-anxiety scores anH increases in internal loci of
control scores after exposure to NLP.
Even though the controversy about whether NLP is a method or myth still
goes on, many other fields and disciplines herald these NLP methods. Examples
of NLP adoptions are in the fields of education, business, law enforcement, human
development, and training among others (Adler, 1992; Andreas C. & Andreas S.,
1987; Brooks, 1991; Childers, 1985; Dastoor, 1993; Dilts, 1982; Gray, 1991;
Harris, 1992; Murrell, 1987; Torres & Katz, 1982; Torres, 1986; Weisburgh,
1990).
Association Shift Technique
A NLP technique used for expanding one's preconceived limits is the NLP
Association Shift Technique. This technique is particularly useful in conflict
situations, because it assists participants in looking at the conflict through different
perspectives.
In a conflict situation typically each participant is absorbed in
communicating their perspectives, views and ideas to the other person. Recent
research done by Pinkley and Northcraft (1994) explores the idea of conflict
frames. They define a conflict frame as the reference that refers to the perceptual

51

orientation of the individual or the lens each of us uses to view the world. Conflict
frames not only inspire different courses of action in a conflict, but also led
participants to focus on different aspects of the conflict while ignoring others.
Each conflict frame, which may be purely at a subconscious level, is the
product of the personal script that the person uses for information searching,
processing, and evaluating. Pinkley and Northcraft postulate that there are three
basis conflict frames:
1. relationship vs. task
2. emotional vs. intellectual
3. cooperate vs. win
The relationship vs. task frame refers to the amount of influence that the
ongoing relationships in the conflict have on the person. Individuals with a high
concern for the interpersonal relationship have more of a relational focus.
Conversely, individuals who have a task orientation focus more on the material
aspects of the dispute, such as money and the structure of the settlement.
The second bipolar dimension of emotional/intellectual represents the
degree of attention the disputants play to the emotional tones of the conflict. At the
emotional end of this dimension, the person is more sensitive to the feelings
displayed in the conflict such as anger and frustration. Whereas, the intellectual
side focuses more on the actions and behaviors, such as aggressive or avoidance
behaviors. Finally, the cooperate/win dimension describes the bipolar goals of
cooperation or the desire to personally win no matter what.
Specifically, the NLP technique of using a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd person shift is
for gaining different perspectives on the situation. The Association Shift

52

Technique's foundation is that the participant must believe that information
contained in the conflict or situation is merely feedback. Here, feedback is neither
good nor bad just information for facilitating understanding. Using the conflict
frame theory, this technique helps one to determine what frame or lens the other
person is using and how to most effectively communicate for achieving desired
communication goals.
This Association Shift process is:
1. Association in the 1st person or see things as you normally
do through your own eyes.
2. Associating in the 2nd person or imagine that you are in the
other person's shoes. How do they view the conflict? Where are they coming from?
3. Associating in the 3rd person by shifting perspectives to
emulate a third party observer. How am I reacting in this situation? How is the
other person reacting?
Essentially, this 3rd person shift works to help you reframe the conflict. This
perspective entails the person to look at the situation through his or her own eyes
as if he or she is seeing it for the first time. The meaning of an event depends on
the frame you put into it, implying that if you change the frame you change the
meaning. Shifting into tins 3rd person perspective also allow you to see how
effectively you are communicating.
Bell (1983) studied the relationship of conflict and linguistic diversity used
in conflict situations. She concluded that people tended to use a simpler syntax and
a more restricted word vocabulary when in conflict situations. Her observations
were that participants were more prone to repeat rather than elaborating on their

53

positions. As anxiety increased due to the conflict, people's perspective-taking
abilities decreased along with die increase of habitual speech patterns that were
comfortable for the speaker. This NLP technique gives you a tool for helping you
communicate more effectively especially in these times of heightened emotions
(Lewis & Puclek, 1990).

Modeling Technique
The NLP technique of modeling helps people learn new skills, ideas, and
gives odier perspectives for the situation. Modeling is the practice of placing
yourself in someone else's shoes whom you believe have achieved excellence in a
pertinent area. An example of modeling in a conflict situation is when you find
yourself tongue-tied in an argument. Disassociating, you realize that you are not
effectively making your point. To model, you reframe the argument in terms of
how Abraham Lincoln (or anyone else who inspires you) would handle it.
Emulating diis distinguished statesman is a device to help you think more clearly
through the issues and context of die situation.
Modeling doesn't have to imitate another person. You can model yourself
when you felt more in control, more confident, and more positive about your
abilities. In the argument example, you could recall how you felt in that school
debate in which you took first place. How did you form your arguments? Were
you cool under pressure or fired up about your convictions? Superimposing the
past success on die present conflict gives you anodier way to look at what is
happening and odier avenues for response.

54

Pacing and Leading
After achieving communication rapport by identifying and matching of
PRS's and the other's nonverbal language, the NLP technique of Pacing and
Leading can facilitate the manager in teaching new ideas, information, and skills.
This Pacing and Leading technique first entails that you work on building this
prescribed rapport. Next, you start with communicating information or ideas that
are similar to the ones the other people understand. For example, an instructor
would start with a premise or idea that die class has already learned. The boss may
discuss a procedure that the employee is already familiar with.
Once everyone is on the same wavelength, the NLP practitioner proceeds to
instruct the new idea dirough incorporating what is applicable in the past (learned
material) into the new material. Hie trainer explains new material to die group by
communicating it in the three sensoiy representational systems of visual, auditory,
and kinesthetic. For example, the instructor explains the new concept (auditory),
while showing a diagram or picture (visual), and connects the new ideas to more
familiar ideas by giving personal examples that causes the learners to identify how
the new information feels to diem (kinesthetic). Finally die trainer/instructor
further cements this new knowledge through the use of repetition and concrete
examples or demonstrations.

55

NLP Summary
In conclusion, Neuro-Linguistic Programming is a complex model that
offers a number of strategies for achieving one's communication goals.
Researchers are debating about die validity of the NLP model because of
conflicting findings in their empirical studies. Most of the NLP studies were in the
1980's in response to the initial works of Bandler, Grinder, Dilts, and others. More
recently, NLP methods and techniques for achieving communication change and
personal excellence are being applied to wide variety of disciples and publications.
These NLP practitioners from different disciplines are using NLP for gaining new
insights, meanings, and alternative behaviors (Brooks, 1991).

NLP and RT Implications in Business
Determining what employee's attitudes and beliefs are, how these beliefs
affect job behavior and job effectiveness is often an organizational goal of
progressive companies (Alder, 1992; Connor, 1990). NLP techniques are
beneficial in business especially in team building, negotiation, and selling products
and services (Dilts, 1983). Managers can learn how their employees are processing
their world. Correctly and skillfully applied NLP techniques enhance rapport and
communication goals (Brooks, 1991). Supervisors trained in NLP and RT
techniques and principles display more flexibility in their thinking and behavior

56

choice selections for themselves and their employees (Glasser, 1994; Harris,
1992).
Control Theory can also be superimposed on to Deming's Fourteen
Management Points (Glasser, 1994). The quality movement uses Deming's
directives for the need of corporations to focus on the product and service. Control
Theory (CT) principles provide an understanding of human needs and behaviors
that assist in the quality mission. In CT terms, in order for the organization's
mission statement to be effective it must in the personal picture albums of their
workers. If this picture of quality is part of the personal picture album of the
worker, she or he will fulfill this picture because it will be a need driven behavior.
When the employees are self-motivated towards this mission the need for outside
inspection will not be necessary for self-inspection is apart of the work process
(Glasser, 1994; Hoglund, 1993).
Deming's seventh point of management is about instituting a lead
management style. This lead management style is synonymous with the RT
principle of leading without coercion. Facilitation, lead management, and
participation has all been observed as the management style needed for open
communication between superiors and subordinates (Glasser, 1994; Gonring,
1991).
NLP and Reality Therapy have a number of similar nominalizations
(presuppositions) that allows for the possibility of creating a combined program to
be developed for helping people (Geronilla, 1989). This combined program of RT
and NLP can help a manager to better discern the best possible mode of

57

communication and interaction course with their subordinates in order to achieve
their communication and managerial goals.
This thesis examines a combination of NLP techniques and RT methods for
use by managers to assist in improving the quality and effectiveness of their
downward communications. These concrete steps, specific actions, observations,
and principles, that this research proposes, are for practical use in the workplace.
The other desired outcome is for the development of more rapport and trust
between managers and their employees, along with increasing estimates by their
subordinates of perceived understanding. Future studies could include taking these
combined principles into the work place. The managerial model, once taught, can
then be tested for reliability and validity.

58

V. RESEARCH- CONTENT AND CONCEPTUAL ANALYSIS
In Glasser's (1994) book, The Control Theory Manager, he applies his
Control Theory, along with ideas from Deming, to die genre of organizational
culture. He proposes that Control Theory principles and Reality Theory techniques
assist managers in achieving quality work from his or her subordinates. Numerous
Neuro-Linguistic proponents also work specifically with this superior-subordinate
dyad for achieving communication goals (Adler, 1992; Andreas & Andreas, 1987;
Brooks, 1991; Dilts, 1983; Harris, 1992; Laborde, 1987). Reality Therapy, Control
Theory and Neuro-Linguistic Programming methods and techniques work with
various types of dyads, such as teacher-student, counselor-student, probation
officer-client, and therapist-client. In each of these dyads, one member is
responsible for setting the objectives and agendas for the other party. Though types
of agendas, backgrounds, and circumstances are different in each case, die
superior-subordinate relationship, as defined above, exists in each of these
relationships.
Examination of both die RT and NLP literature shows agreement in a
number of foundations and propositions. Both theories propose die idea that
information processing is an individual subjective experience, where a person's
internal representation or personal pictures (refer to pg. 9) are the product of the
sensory processes of that individual. Both NLP and RT maintain that our external
sensory experiences go through internal processing by passing first through the
total knowledge filter for identifying what experience represents. Also, we
subconsciously compare this experience identification with our personal picture of
what will fulfill our needs through the valuing filter to see it meets our needs or

59

not. NLP explains that this sensory data proceeds through a social filter that
contains our attitudes, beliefs, and values obtained from our culture, and a sensory
filter that relies on the person's predominate sense or PRS.
Both RT and NLP propose that behavior is the manifestation of this internal
processing. RT asserts that when the determination of the person's personal
pictures indicates an imbalance or unfulfillment of needs, a total behavior of some
kind will attempt to restore this balance. These total behaviors, that are attempts to
gain control of these internal imbalances, are not always effective and many times
are detrimental in achievement of the individual's needs. This imbalance, between
what the person's total behavior is and what die person needs initiates a frustration
signal. When the person doesn't recognize this imbalance by changing die acting
component of dieir behavior, die imbalance shows up in odier components of his
or her behavior. Glasser uses die analogy of a front wheel drive car to explain the
concept of total behavior. The front wheels of the car are the diinking and acting
components of behavior and the back wheels represent the feeling and
physiological components of the total behavior. As the metaphor suggests, by
moving or changing the acting and diinking components affects all the odier
components.
Fundamental to RT practices is assertion that one may not always be able to
change tiieir feelings, and physiological reactions, but they can always change their
actions. Glasser focuses on tiiis acting component more than die diinking
component. Even though a person can greatiy modify his or her thinking, Glasser
asserts, one may not always be able to control this thinking component. Therefore,
making a new plan of action has more effective results in changing tiiese other

60

components of total behavior. For example, a chronic stress suffers, who does
nothing to amend his or her situation, will often display a variety of physical
symptoms (such as head aching, stomach aching, heart attacking). Glasser
describes these maladies in action verb form to illustrate that these maladies are
not being inflicted on the person, but that the person is an active agent in creating
these afflictions, whether conscious or not. Moreover, this physiological attempt to
fulfill the imbalance that stress induces can exist internally for a long time (with
major physiological changes accumulating over time and are dependent on the
severity and duration of the stresses) before the person is aware of or forced to
find new effective ways to respond.
NLP is the thinking wheel that links Glasser's behavioral car. While NLP and
RT are both concerned with changing the thinking component of the total
behavior, NLP's concentration is on the person's thinking or perceptions. NLP's
methods encourage the person to reevaluate his or her self-talk or thinking. This
reevaluation encourages the person to perceive other alternatives and possibilities,
and, therefore, assists in the discovery of new and more successful way of acting
and thinking in his or her particular situation.
NLP recognizes this RT idea of imbalance. In NLP, the RT concept of
imbalance (created by tire discrepancy of what the individual is currently doing,
total behavior, and Iris or her needs) is seen through the person's language choices.
These language droices may indicate fire existence of deleterious associations
assimilated into the person's assumptions through the brain mechanisms of
generalization, deletion and distortion (refer to pg. 23). Transformational grammar
cues, such as unspecified verbs, unspecified referential indexes, modal operators,

61

universal qualifiers, cause-chain effects, and mind-reading incidents are the
semantic fingerprint of these distorted assumptions incorporated into the person's
world by the process of generalization, deletion and distortion (refer to pg. 24-26).
Both RT and NLP use communication as a vehicle for therapeutic change.
The RT procedures that lead to change involve the questions: What do you want?
What are doing now? Is what you are doing now helping? What can you do
differently to get what you want? NLP techniques involve having the individual
identify his or her goal and desired outcomes (similar to RT's- what do you want?).
After this identification of tire person's desired state, the NLP practitioner then
accesses the person's internal state through the observation of his or her language
choices to identify incidents of generalization, deletion and distortion that may be
holding the person’ back from achieving his or her desired state (similar to RT'swhat are you doing now?). Finally, the NLP practitioner helps the other person
discover these hampering beliefs in order realign desired outcomes with flexible
behavioral choices that are more conducive to success. Both RT and NLP stress
flexibility in behavior for helping the person formulate this new plan of action. If a
particular behavior or plan of action doesn't work, then the client continues to
create a plan of action until he or she finds one that works.
Because of the similarity in the foundations of NLP and RT, techniques and
procedures of each are analyzed via the framework for quality proposed by
Glasser (1994). For the purposes of this thesis, literature from RT and NLP
concerning the different dyads outlined above is sorted into the following
categories. A conceptual analysis of the implications of each NLP and RT

62

technique and procedure for managerial communication follows each content
category.
These categories, for this content analysis, for both Reality Therapy and
Neuro-Linguistic Programming proposed by Glasser in his 1994 book, The
Control Theory Manager, are five conditions for quality in our organizations.
These five conditions are:
CATEGORY I:
The work environment must be warm and supportive. The workers must
trust die managers.
CATEGORY II:
Since quality is always useful, workers should only be asked to do useful
work and should be encouraged to contribute to the usefulness of what is
being done.
CATEGORY III:
Workers are asked to do the best work they can do.
CATEGORY IV:
From the time the workers are lured, lead managers will guide the process
of helping them learn to continually evaluate their work. Then, based on this
on-going self-evaluation, lead managers will encourage workers to improve
tire quality of what they do.
CATEGORY V:
Quality work always feels good (p. 18-26).

63

CONTENT ANALYSIS
CATEGORY I:
THE WORK ENVIRONMENT MUST BE WARM AND SUPPORTIVE.
THE WORKERS MUST TRUST THE MANAGERS.
As reviewed earlier, research indicates that employees report greater job
satisfaction, more work motivation, and higher estimation of self-worth when they
perceive their work environment as being warm and supportive. In this supportive
work environment job, satisfaction increases when these employees feel free to
express their feelings, and in turn feel they are being understood by their superiors
(Jablin, 1979; Schnake et al, 1990; Likert & Seashore, 1963; Cahn, 1986; King,
1986). Glasser defines this work environment, which is warm and supportive, as
being free of coercive practices intended to control others. The outcome of tins
type of supportive work environment is the genuine cooperation between manager
and worker and among workers themselves. Corporate culture studies describe
this environment as a participative organizational culture. Glasser, agreeing with
Deming, explains that this culture is possible because of the lead-management
practices, where die lead-manager shares power and decision-making with their
employees. In addition, these employees are responsible for self-evaluation of
work and improvements for quality work.

64

Category I contents:
Hie following NLP, RT, and Control Theory methods and principles, placed in this
first content category, are for assisting die manager in building trust and rapport
with his or her subordinates. Also included in this content category are Control
Theory practices that helping build rapport by working toward fulfilling die
worker's basic needs of belonging and power.
1. NLP facilitates rapport building through representational matching by assessing
language or predicate choices and eye accessing-cues along with considering
context as related to the intended meaning of the subordinate's communication.
The NLP technique of rapport building involves Matching and Mirroring the
communication partner's verbal and nonverbal communication. One of the primary
ways to match is representational system matching and involves assessing the
communication partner's language or predicate choices and his or her eye­
accessing cues (along with considering die context of die communication) to
reveal the "map of die territory" which from die other person is operating.
The NLP concept of Primary Representational System (PRS) is die idea
that even though we use all our senses to experience the world, we tend to rely on
one sense, either visual (seeing), auditory (hearing), or kinesthetic (feeling), more
often to process die information that we perceive. Reliance on a primary sense is
especially prevalent in times of stress, uncertainty, or when presented with new
information. The NLP model of PRS matching maintains that certain predicates or
word choices in a person's language indicate what sense that person is using to
process their perceptions. Examples of predicates that indicate a visual PRS are

65

see, illustrate, show, reveal, picture, clear, and focus. Auditory predicates include
hear, ask, voice, tone, sound, say, and ring. Whereas, people who rely more on
their feelings or have a kinesthetic PRS explain things with predicates such as
touch, move, feel, stoke, handle, move, and tangible (see Appendix 2 for an
expanded list of indicative PRS predicates).
Discovering what PRS a person is using also involves observing their body
language. NLP maintains that when a person is accessing a certain representational
state, they will display distinct, identifiable (though mostly subtle) eye-movements.
These specific eye-movements are eye-accessing cues. For example, when a
person thinks about an image or visual picture from his or her past, die eyes look
up and to the left. Conversely, when die visual picture is a constructed image of a
possible future experience, the person looks up and to the right. Auditory PRS eye­
accessing cues are on a horizontal plane and again indicate a remembered
conversation by moving left and show a constructed hearing message by looking
right. Whereas, when the person looks downward to the left and right, she or he
displays evidence that he or she is accessing the kinesthetic PRS and internal
dialogues. NLP practitioners use the observation of the person's predicate choices
and eye-accessing cues to discover their communication partner’s PRS. NLP
ascertains that these observations always need to be assessed for accuracy through
considering the context of the communication and the communication partner's
intended meaning for congruency.

66

2. NLP technique of Matching and Mirroring also involves matching the
communication partner's nonverbals, such as body positions, vocalics, and
breathing patterns for rapport-building.
According to the NLP model, when the NLP practitioner mirrors and
matches, in a similar not mocking manner, the other person's nonverbals, such as
body positions, breathing characteristics, and vocal qualities. The intended
outcome is to foster identification so a deeper level of rapport develops. The
product is one of recognition; "I understand that you are like me."
Other techniques of mirroring involve the NLP Practitioner indirectly
reproducing their partner's body positions. For example, die practitioner displays a
similar body posture (either upright or relaxed) along with similar arm or hand
movements (such as talking with hands or moving arms and hands in certain way)
. Accomplished NLP practitioners, who use these mirroring techniques, even
adjust their breathing levels to match those of their partner’s. For example, a more
relaxed personality often breathes in a slower and deeper manner, an accomplished
practitioner will observe the person's breathing characteristics by watching the
outline of the shoulder movement to see the rise and fall of the chest. This
practitioner then either increases or decreases his or her breathing rate and depth.
The practice of these mirroring and matching technique is not a direct imitation of
such movements. NLP asserts that practice is necessary so that these matching
movements are slightly altered and delayed from that which the person exhibits.
The mirroring technique also matches die vocal qualities of the
communication partner, such as speaking with a similar pitch, tone, and speed. For
example, when you speak to an uncertain and timid employee in a slower, softer

67

manner, you have a greater chance of that employee being more receptive to you.
This is especially evident, when you see someone shrink away from a superior who
is talking to them in a loud, fast, and brusque manner.
3. RTs foundation of fostering trust, by relating as friends, also works toward
fulfilling the employees need for power and control.
Relating as friends in the superior-subordinate context involve die superior
revealing:
-Who she or he is.
-What he or she stands for.
-What she or he will ask die workers to do.
-What he or she will not ask die workers to do.
-What he or she will do for them or with them.
-What she or he will not do for die (Glasser, 1994, p. 30-35).
Reality Therapy fosters trust by relating to others as friends for friends will
do more for each other than strangers. How one relates as friends and how much
one needs to share with another varies according to individual and the situation.
More often than not, relating as friends can simply involve giving die other person
your time by being open and receptive.
Managers develop friendships, says Glasser, when they reveal some basic
personal information. By relating basic lifestyle information and personal beliefs,
the worker identifies the manager as real person, who like themselves have a life
outside the workplace with responsibilities, joys, stresses, personal interests, and

68

values. The premise here is that we connect to other people more when we can
feel their humanity.
As a friend, the manager needs to remove as much ambiguity as possible.
When the manager explains to his or her subordinates what he or she will and will
not do for them, workers see a clearer picture of where they stand and what their
manager expects of them. For example, as a manager you can make it clear that
you expect your employees to solve minor job obstacles on their own. You can
reinforce that you will provide die resources necessary for solving these problems
but you will not do it for them. This gives the employees control and responsibility
for producing quality work and works toward fulfilling the basic need for power.
4. The Control Theory principle, that no coercion is allowed, maintains that
criticism is always destructive to quality work.
Here, criticism is the action of focusing on the negative or aggressively
laying blame on the individual. Evaluation, when done properly, is not an act of
self-criticism. The process of self-evaluation is critical to the RT process and relies
on the person evaluating die effectiveness of his or her conduct or behavioral
choices. Self-evaluation's focus is for examining current total behaviors and the
effectiveness or ineffectiveness of this total behavior for obtaining successful
results, as objectively as possible.
Both Glasser and Deming believe that coercion, criticism, and punishments
are killers of quality work. Boss-managers employ either or both explicit and
implicit means in their coercive practices. Looks of disgust, dismissing gestures
and body language, tones of the voice that indicate disdain or disapproval, and

69

refusing to look at and talk to the employee, send a message of criticism.
Criticism, even if intended to be constructive, destroys trust and friendship and
results in a loss of control in die worker. Again, criticism is not die act of self­
reflection and evaluation for better choices or alternatives, but is the intention to
focus on the negative of the situation. Instead of focusing on die negative or
criticizing, Glasser suggests that the manager works with die employee by
suggesting and joindy devising more effective courses of action.
5. Control Theory also states that it is necessary to foster a sense of friendship or
trust, in order to fulfill the basic human need of belonging.
Fostering a sense of belonging is a crucial element in creating a warm and
supportive work environment. Control Theory proposes that human total behaviors
are our best attempts at the time to meet our needs. However, many total
behaviors are ineffective in this attempt. The basic human needs are the need for
survival, love/belonging, power/importance, fun/enjoyment, and freedom/choices.
Beyond the survival level (which is a need for food, shelter, and air), the most
universal human need is die need for love and belonging. Dramatic illustrations of
the importance of this need for love and belonging are seen in die reports of
fatality in newborn infants, who were sensory-deprived. It was the failure to touch,
talk too, and show love to these infants, not failure to provide them with their basic
needs, that resulted in their dying or their failure to thrive.
This need to belong is crucial to die effectiveness of the organization. If the
organization treats their workers as outsiders and incidental, then most of their
attempts to foster rapport and trust will be futile. This is evident in boss-

70

management cultures, where tire workers are an expendable resource, always other
workers who can take their place. These workers feel that they have little personal
value to the organization. Therefore, these workers will not put the same effort
into producing quality work for boss-managers as they would for lead-managers,
who treats them as a valuable resource. Even if a worker has a strong internal
motivation, the output and quality of his or her work will be negatively affected by
die boss-manager who treat him or her as an expendable resource.

CONCEPTUAL ANALYSIS
Rapport and trust building are the fundamental foundations of both RT and
NLP. The subsequent effectiveness of RT and NLP practices rely on building this
foundation. Many of the inferences and techniques of these paradigms may seem
to be simplistic or a matter of common sense. However, the practices of trust and
rapport building appear to be uncommon as people frequendy report feeling very
little trust and rapport in their organizations. When a work environment is warm
and supportive, as perceived by the employees, the case may be that many of these
effective lead-managers use some of these RT and NLP ideas more intuitively
rather than purposively. However, both RT and NLP propose that die more
conscious the practice and intent for rapport and trust building is, die more
successful these helping practices will be.
When managers attempt to control their employees through coercion and
punishment, they destroy this warm and supportive environment. In die real world,

71

these coercive practices are difficult to eliminate. For many, blaming and focusing
on the negative is die only way he or she knows how to control. Punishment
practices often get more immediate and visible results. However, punishment is
die downfall for quality work in the long run because die result of these practices
is that the workers lose control. Eliminating these coercive practices is crucial.
Glasser insists, as does Deming, that the responsibility and control for doing
quality work must be given to die employees. Moreover, they maintain that
awareness of the negative effects of coercion, along with practice in eliminating
these habits, requires effort and a long-term commitment on the part of the
organization.
Beyond bringing this need to build rapport and trust to awareness, what
specifically can a manager do to develop trust and rapport with his or her
subordinate? The basic skill the manager needs to develop before they are able to
use die NLP Matching and Mirroring technique is active listening. This process of
active listening and acutely observing is difficult for many people. A hindrance in
this pursuit of actively listening and observing can be die individual's internal
dialogues, personal needs, along with the external distractions present in the
situation. Frequentiy, people fail to actively listen to another because he or she is
so busy thinking of his or her own responses, opinions, and ideas. If this is indeed
die reason, it seems then as a necessary prerequisite for active listening one needs
to practice quieting this internal dialogue and consciously work on placing our
attention on the other person. The practice of only listening to parts of
conversations and not noticing other displays in the interaction is often due to long
standing habits. Such habits of resisting change by reifying what we already know

72

and believe in hampers our active listening attempts, especially when the other
person is relaying new or contrary information. Low self-esteem is also another
hindrance to active listening. When one is scrambling to formulate and substantiate
his or her own point of view while the other person is talking, the quality and
quantity of listening suffers. A common example of how our internal dialogues
and habits inhibit the practice of active listening is when we are introduced to
someone for the first time and promptly forget the other person's name. Here, we
are so busy assessing this person drat we fail to pay attention to fire introduction,
consequently our listening attempts become secondary. This tendency to size up
and fit new acquaintances into our personal construct system is a part of our
humanness. It takes practice and conscious effort to overcome this natural
reaction.
NLP rapport building techniques gives practical ideas for developing active
listening and observing skills. In order to utilize the Matching and Mirroring
technique, the manager needs to actively listen and observe her or his subordinate.
Along with trying to grasp the other’s meaning, NLP practitioners actively listen for
specific predicate choices while also observing his or her communication partner's
nonverbals for identifying that person's "map of the territory."
Active listening is also crucial to Glassefs concept of fostering trust In this
case, the communication partner, who is being attentively listened to, feels valued
and worthwhile. Active listening gives diem a sense of belonging. An illustration
of this is when children act out as a response to being ignored. This feeling of
being unloved, because of the lack of attention, causes the child to act "bad" to get
attention when acting "good" doesn't work.

73

An essential ingredient for active listening involves taking the time to listen.
In our fast place and complex world taking and making time to actively listen is
often difficult to do. However, without this effort to make time for active listening
any attempts for rapport building will be thwarted.
The NLP practice of taking an ecology check grounds these techniques. The
act of taking an ecology check is simply checking die communication feedback for
assessing the accurateness of our perceptions and estimations. The NLP
practitioner, when taking an ecology check, is using die skill of active listening by
communicating what his or her perceptions are to die communication partner, in
order to assess his or her evaluations about where die communication partner is
coming from. For example, if by actively listening I hear the person describing in
visual predicates and looking up to die left and right while formulating his or her
thoughts, I conclude that this person is accessing their visual PRS. An ecology
check for this conclusion involves asking a question about this perception, and
stating this question or observation in predicates matching in the other’s displayed
PRS. Such queries for the visual PRS are "let me see if I understand what you are
saying, the picture I get from your description is..." To check for accurateness in
the assessment of which PRS the communication partner's is accessing, the NLP
practitioner confirms by searching for verbal agreement using the same PRS
predicates.
In conclusion, the art of rapport and trust building are dependent on the
active listening skills of the manager. NLP's Matching and Mirroring technique
both help develop these skills, and in turn is dependent on these active listening
and acutely observing skills. Active listening is also a pre-requisite for die R.T

74

foundation of trust building. As die manager becomes more accomplished in these
skills, die subordinate's sense of belonging and identifying with the manager also
grows.

CATEGORY Hs
SINCE QUALITY IS ALWAYS USEFUL, WORKERS SHOULD ONLY BE
ASKED TO DO USEFUL WORK AND SHOULD BE ENCOURAGED TO
CONTRIBUTE TO THE USEFULNESS OF WHAT IS BEING DONE.
Category H contents:
Ibis category's contents contain practices dial assist die manager in explaining and
teaching workers how and why their jobs are useful and necessary to the company.
Along with teaching new skills and ideas for improving quality and usefulness,
Control Theory practices that include and solicit die worker’s suggestions and ideas
about how their work can be improved, and, therefore, contribute to die usefulness
of what is being done are also sorted into this category. In addition, this category
contains die NLP practice of sensory acuity and flexibility for assisting the
manager in obtaining his or her communication goal of achieving employee
understanding of these new skills and ideas.

75

1. Glasser defines a Control Theory manager as a person who can relate to his or
her employees as a teacher, who explains the job and its usefulness to die
organization.
This process of teaching and learning involves both managers and their
subordinates. Managers encourage workers to make a difference in their jobs
through being alert to better ways of doing their job. The manager by listening
carefully to these contributions integrates and teaches those ideas that improve
quality to others who can use them. Glasser maintains that it is the usefulness of
die work that helps to motivate the employees. This is especially true when the
employee contributes to die quality of the work through his or her own ideas and
discoveries.
2. NLP technique of Pacing and Leading is a method for teaching employees new
skills, ideas, and concepts that increase the quality and usefulness of their work.
This Pacing and Leading technique first involves explaining a new concept
or skill by associating this new idea with an idea or skill that die employee is
already familiar with. Another way for the manager to achieve rapport and invoke
a sense of familiarity, or pace, is to ask the employee about a problem dial would
benefit from the new idea he or she is about to learn. This pacing component is for
helping the employee feel comfortable with the new idea by finding a common
ground.
Once the manager achieves this rapport through pacing, he or she can next
lead into the new area by bridging this new knowledge with die old. Pacing and
Leading involves explaining the new material in the three sensory modes of visual,

76

auditoiy, and kinesthetic. The manager contributes to understanding of this new
concept by providing visual cues, such as pictures, diagrams, and charts. Along
with these visual aids, the manager gives the auditoiy message or explanation of
the new idea In order to explain in the kinesthetic mode, the manager uses
examples that are familiar so that the employee may recall previous actions,
emotions, and feelings. Then, the manager connects this past picture and feeling
with die visual and emotional picture of the new concept, skill, or technique. In
order to help subordinates understand new ideas, the NLP trainer evokes the
kinesthetic sense by asking the employee to consider how he or she will feel once
he or she uses or understands this new concept or skill.
3. The NLP practice of sensory acuity and flexibility assist the manager in
achieving employee understanding and other communication goals.
Sensory acuity, in the practice of NLP, is the process of acutely observing
die employees feedback concerning how die message is being received. The
manager looks for resistance or confusion about die new idea by carefully paying
attention to the employees verbal and nonverbal responses. The employee, for
example, in learning the new software program, may verbally respond that he or
she will never understand this or this employee may simply retreat through body
language, by folding his or her arms, avoiding eye contact, and/or display looks of
frustration on his or her face. By using sensoiy acuity, the manager-trainer can
adjust his or her message for finding other alternatives for explaining, such as
giving a better visual picture, or relating the new information in less technical or
threatening language. The key for success in relating this new information entails

77

manager to be flexible in her or his communication. This idea of being flexible in
selecting alternatives or choices is a key concept in both NLP and RT.
4. Control Theory states that when a manager encourages her or his employees to
give opinions about how they can improve their work and contribute to the
usefulness of what is being done, the manager helps her or his employees fulfill
their basic needs.
When the manager asks for input from the employee for improving the
usefulness of what he or she does, the manager is fulfilling a basic need. This basic
need, which Glasser defines in his Control Theory, is the need for power and
recognition and the need for freedom. This request for die employee's opinion,
when the manager intently and genuinely listens to the worker, helps fulfill the
employee's need for recognition.
By listening to negative as well as die positive messages of the employee,
the manager gives the signal to the employee that it is permissible to say what is on
his or her mind. This employee's perception of feeling free to speak helps fulfill his
or her basic need of freedom. Conversely, if a manager restricts what he or she
wants or is willing to hear, the employee will not feel free to give their honest
input.
4. The NLP technique of PEGASUS is a framework the manager utilizes for
holding useful meetings.
PEGASUS comprises of seven steps:
1. Present outcomes

78

2. Explain evidence
3. Gain agreement for outcomes
4. Activate sensory acuity
5. Summarize each major decision
6. Use relevancy challenge
7. Summarize the next step.
The first step is to present file specific outcomes, objectives, or goals that
concerns this meeting through written agendas (provided prior to the meeting), flip
charts, or other visual aids. Next, the manager discusses die evidence for this
desired outcome by explaining to the employees what they will see, hear, and feel
as a result of achieving this outcome. For example, Jane Smith a marketing
manager for XYZ corporation presents the outcome of her meeting as a decision
to develop the new product, widgetatron. Ms. Smith displays the marketing
evidence compiled for developing this product through such visualize as overhead
charts showing survey information, competitor products, and consumer buying
habits. Along with this presentation, she has die people involved with development
and marketing speak about die viability of this new product and potential for
increased sales. In addition to presenting die evidence for this decision through
visual and auditory cues, Ms. Smith asks her employees to consider past examples
of similar product development and how they felt about its process.
The next step of this PEGASUS technique operates throughout the meeting.
Here, the practice of sensory acuity or actively observing is done with the manager
observing each person in die meeting for any nonverbals indicating agreement or
disagreement. Because the manager knows that the hardest obstacles in gaining

79

agreement for the outcomes will be from those who disagree, and for whatever the
reason, and remain silent. In addition to responding to verbal questions and
objections, die manager is searching for those who are silently objecting or who
are displaying incongruent nonverbal and verbal messages.
This PEGASUS technique needs to be flexibility executed as every situation
is different. The manager may be dealing with different hidden agendas and will
have to use this skill of sensory acuity and flexibility for guidance in how to handle
die perceived incongruency. The manager, in this case, may decide to wait and
deal with his or her perceptions after the meeting or may use this opportunity to
ask the employee about his or her feelings. For example, die manager may inquire,
"You seem to have some hesitancy about accepting this outcome, do you have
something else on your mind?" The purpose here is to work on gaining a verbal
consensus before going on. However, if the manager receives information
indicating that this outcome needs to be reconsidered, then the meeting should be
postponed in order to research this new input.
If there are no significant objections or discovery of significant information
that is missing, the next step entails die manager using the technique of chunking
dawn. Chunking down is the process of breaking down the outcomes into specific
tasks and decisions. After breaking down the larger outcome into various decisions
and tasks, the group proceeds by addressing each decision in order of importance
to the presented outcome. After each group decision, the manager summarizes by
clearly conveying what was decided in concrete representational (visual, auditory
and kinesthetic) terms. Again, die manager utilizes sensory acuity to check for
objections and misunderstandings before going on.

80

Periodically following discussions or information inpi^tc the manager
employs the method of taking a relevancy challenge. The process posing a
relevancy challenge is the act of the manager asking the group to consider the
discourse and information in terms of relevancy. For example, if the manager, after
a particular idea exchange, feels that the group is wandering off die subject, then
she or he asks the group to consider what was said and evaluate the relevancy of
these ideas or discourses to the stated outcome. This relevancy check is not a
technique for enforcing a particular viewpoint, but is a device for keeping the
discussion on the subject. The manager should not use this device to silence any
members or attack individual ideas. This tool is merely for determining whether
die ideas being presented are useful or applicable for this meeting.
Finally, the manager closes the meeting with a summary of the major
decisions, tasks outline, and outcomes. Along with the summary of the meeting's
accomplishments and decisions, the manager closes die meeting with a summary
of die next step or plan of action. Again, the manager presents this final summary,
as well as all explanations, in the concrete sensory representational statements of
visual, auditory, and kinesthetic. This PEGASUS method for holding useful
meetings relies not only on die stated NLP skills but also on the input and
cooperation of the employees in the meeting.

81

CONCEPTUAL ANAT .VSTS
This content category links the idea of quality and useful work with the idea
that useful work practices, intended for achieving a quality outcome, work toward
fulfilling employee's basic human needs. Employees should not only perceive their
work as useful but also have opportunity to give input to contribute to this
usefulness. Though it may seem obvious that requiring workers to do useless work
is counterproductive for motivating workers to do quality work, many seem not to
understand the power of having employees engage in useful work as being
fundamental for motivating workers to do quality work.
Presented under this category of useful work are techniques for teaching and
communicating employees the skills or new ideas that promote the usefulness of
their work. The first item suggests that Glasser’s idea of relating to employees as a
teacher helps managers communicate ways to improve the employee's work.
Besides teaching new skills, the manager as a teacher explains how their job
procedures help achieve quality in their work.
However, the case may be that the employee, as required by the rules of the
organization, engages in practices that do not contribute to the usefulness of their
work. In this case, the manager can elicit input from his or her employee about the
specific practices or rules that are detrimental to the usefulness of the job. The
effect of asking the employee to contribute to the usefulness of their work is for
building compliance from the subordinate and gives the employee a sense of job
ownership and power..Obviously, the success for changing organizational rules
depends of the larger organizational culture. In actuality, the manager may have

82

very little power to do so. Certainly, the manager can adjust his or her own
expectations about the employee's job in light of this new input.
For example, many organizations recognize die value of employee input for
compliance gaining by utilizing die practice of soliciting suggestions. Employee
suggestion boxes, questionnaires, focus groups, and other such methods are
vehicles for getting employee input. However, in order to be effective, the
organization or manager must "walk the talk" and address each suggestion with the
employee or post a response. If the suggestion box is just for show die employees
will soon start to recognize this. Even if the suggestions are not viable, the
manager can explain why these suggestions aren't applicable or even consider how
to expand or change these ideas into something that is workable.
Pacing and Leading is especially beneficial when used to teach new material
or new skills and techniques that meet employee resistance. For example, many
positions are integrating computer systems and complex software. The
introduction of new technology can be especially intimidating for people who have
been in their jobs for a number of years. This emotional response may be due to a
variety of causes, such as not understanding how to use the technology along with
die fear of making mistakes. In this case a manager could use the Pacing and
Leading technique for helping his or her employees feel more comfortable. An
example of pacing is to link the unfamiliarity of this new technology with how the
employee felt when microwaves or calculators first came out (assume that this
employee is old enough to recall the first microwaves or calculators). The
extension of this would be to have the employee visualize how he or she became
familiar with die new appliance and how he or she now takes this appliance for

83

granted. The manager here is trying to create a comfort level for his or her
employee by connecting the new with the old. Pacing and Leading is for use in a
variety of situations.
Also, presented in this content category is the proposal that the manager
must consciously work on staying flexible in her or his communication choices and
behavior alternatives. This principle of flexibility is central to both RT and NLP.
The more flexible die manager is the better chance of success she or he has in
achieving her or his communication goals.
Another method that contributes to job usefulness is the PEGASUS
technique for holding useful meetings. Meetings, commonly reported by
employees, frequentiy contribute very little to job usefulness. This PEGASUS
method utilizes the idea of compliance gaining, by working on building a
consensus for the outcome. Critical to the success of this method is the
involvement of employees through soliciting their input.
Flexibility is also necessary for the success of PEGASUS. For example,
when the manager gets either verbal or nonverbal feedback during presenting
outcomes, die manager needs to be flexible for dovetailing these presented
outcomes. Achieving agreement by dovetailing outcomes involves the manager
matching the employee's hierarchy of values and criteria An individual's hierarchy
of values are the principles, standards, or qualities that he or she considers
valuable in order of importance. Hierarchy of criteria are die various perceptions
the individual has about the outcome that she or he judges to be important. The
more the manager can include or explain the presented outcome in terms of die

84

group's dominant values and criteria, die greater chance she or he will have for
gaining a consensus.
The above listed ideas, methods, and techniques center on ways to teach or
explain new skills, ideas, or outcomes designed for contributing to the usefulness
of the employee's work. Compliance-gaining, consensus-building, and working to
promote understanding all require die manager's time and effort. The assumption
is that the manager sees the value in involving his or her employees and is not just
interested in dictating his or her edicts.

CATEGORY HI:

WORKERS ARE ASKED TO DO THE BEST THEY CAN DO.
Category IH contents:
This category contains those NLP and Control Theory practices and principles that
a manager can utilize for assisting his or her employee discover and uncover
assumptions, along with new ways of acting and perceiving that will help the
employee do die best he or she can do.
I. The NLP Meta Model of Linguistics helps employees discover and evaluate
those assumptions that may be hindering their work performances.
NLP examines the mental processes of generalization, deletion, and
distortion for possible negative effects or interferences in die employee's attempts

85

to do the best that they can do (refer to pgs. 22-26). The NLP Meta Model of
Linguistics attempts to present new meanings possibilities, and alternative ways of
perceiving and behaving to the employee. By examining and questioning
occurrences of detrimental associations due to the processes of generalization,
deletion, and distortion, the superior can attempt to help die subordinate reassess
his or her past beliefs. These past beliefs may be affecting how die employee is
evaluating his or her present situation. The possibility for the creation of new
meanings arises from the employee critically examining the validity of this past
assumption in his or her present circumstance.
This model works on gathering information and expanding the limits of the
employee's perceptions through examining the employees language choices. The
subordinate's use of transformational grammar cues may indicate possible
dysfunctional assumptions from these processes of generalization, deletion, and
distortion (refer to pgs. 24-26). The superior, upon hearing these transformational
grammar cues, probes for meaning by asking the employee to relate specifically
why, how, what, and how do you know certain assumptions are true. This process
of discovery by the employee may show how his or her perceptions are hindering
work performances and alternatives.
2. The NLP technique of Modeling helps the employee to do his or her best work.
This Modeling technique inspires die employee to do her or his best work
through the use of role models. Modeling is the practice of placing one's self in the
shoes of someone else whom you believe achieved excellence in this area.

86

Modeling can also emulate ourselves when we were more in control, confident, or
positive about our abilities.
By helping the employee find a role model, the supervisor can illustrate
certain techniques, skills, and/or attitudes that will assist die employee in doing a
better job. Also, Modeling can serve as an inspiration for the employee by giving
the employee new ideas and ways of acting that he or she hasn't thought of before.
When die employee reevaluates perceptions and assumptions because of strongly
visualizing past experiences of success or when he or she identifies with a role
model, the chances of perceiving new possibilities also increase.
3. Control Theory states that in order for an employee to do quality work, she or
he must have a personal picture of quality.
Glasser defines this concept ofpersonal pictures as the specific images or
pictures that we devise for satisfying our basic needs. Glasser asserts that we are
responsible for these personal pictures. We can create, remove, or add new
pictures.
Control Theory maintains that this picture of doing quality work, as the
means of fulfilling the need to belong and be recognized, must be in die worker's
personal picture world, in order for the worker to be motivated to do quality
work. In addition, the manager, who desires to be a lead-manager, must also have
a personal picture of his or her employees doing quality work. The personal
picture of die worker doing quality work motivates die lead-manger to strive for
facilitating his or her employee's quality work efforts.

87

4. The NLP technique of Matching Outcomes helps motivate employees do thenbest work.
NLP defines outcome as the intended result in terms of die way the person
would like to see, want to feel, and what he or she will hear when this outcome
happens. This technique involves the manager asking his or her employee state his
or her outcome in specific concrete terms that reflect a positive not a negative or
fear-based result. By assisting die employee in defining these specific results, die
employer attempts to inspire ownership by the employee for this described
outcome.
In this NLP technique of Matching Outcomes, it is necessary to have the
employee define the outcome in sensory terms. By having die employee visualize
what he or she will actually see, hear, and feel upon achieving die outcome, the
superior is helping his or her employee to consider this future construction as a
real possibility.

CONCEPTUAL ANALYSIS
The NLP Meta Model of Linguistics can give the superior clues about his or
her employee's "map of the territory." Through die active listening process, the
manager can uncover those assumptions that are hampering the decisions and
work behaviors of his or her employee. In implementing this model, die manager,
upon hearing transformational grammar cues, attempts to help his or her employee

88

uncover these past assumptions and explore alternative ways of perceiving his or
her situation.
For example, Paul's employee John is having a hard time interacting in his
work team. Paul, rather than just reassigning John, attempts to help John explore
why this group interaction is difficult for him. In their meeting, John tells his boss,
Paul that he believes that "they just don't like me." The "they" refers to the whole
group. Paul, hearing the transformational grammar cues of an unspecified verb and
a universal qualifier, asks John questions for exploring these generalization
references.
In response to John's statement, "they just don't like me," Paul first questions
the "they" assumption. Paul queries, "They, do you mean everyone?" Next, Paul
questions John's perception of not being liked by asking him to relate how
specifically has everyone in the group shown John that they don't like him. By
asking die questions why, how, what, and how do you know in specific terms, Paul
assists John's exploration about die validity of his assumptions for his present
circumstance. John may have legitimate problems with some members in the
group and is extending these feelings to everyone in the group or he may just have
incorrect perceptions about the group's attitudes. Whatever the case may be, this
process of discovering helps John formulate a plan of action for improving this
situation. This examination of the employee's language attempts to uncover those
assumptions that lie beneath the surface, but, nevertheless, influence attitudes and
behavior. The process is not a vehicle for the manager to dictate die meanings that
he or she feels the employee should have, but is for assisting the employee's
attempts to find other ways of looking at things.

89

Another way that the superior can attempt to help her or his employee to do
their best work is through the NLP Modeling technique. In this case, die manager
encourages the employee to reframe the work situation in terms of how a certain
role model (either his or her self in another successful experience or another
successful person) would think, act, and feel in the employee's particular work
situation.
For example, Mary's employee Sue is having a hard time at work because
she has difficulty in presenting at meetings with her superiors present. Sue is a
hard-working and competent employee, however, she becomes tongue-tied when
she presents new or controversial information to her superiors. Because of this
problem with communication competence, Sue has been passed over several times
for promotions and new projects. These rejections are effecting her current work
performances.
Mary attempts to help Sue improve her communication competency by
using die Modeling technique. Mary has Sue remember a time when she felt at
ease speaking in front of a group. Mary chose Sue to emulate herself at a time
when she was more in control and confident, because she knows that Mary has had
this experience. Through these recollections, Sue can bolster her confidence and
attempt to transfer these feelings to her present situation. Mary has Sue vividly
recall this past success in sensory terms, what she felt, heard, and did while she
was successful. Mary may also use someone else in the organization to serve as a
role model for teaching Sue specific presentation skills. Both of these internal and
external models show Sue specific actions and attitudes that she can translate to
her present work situation. The ideas and practices uncovered from this Modeling

90

technique next need to be incorporated into Sue's own presenting style and
reinforced through practice.
Examples of modeling exist in the practice of helping employees through a
mentor's guidance. Mentors or formal mentor programs not only help the
employee learn the ropes but also set examples. The superior can best use these
formal programs for helping the employee by attempting to have the employee
placed with the appropriate role model, who will best serve die needs of this
worker.
Another widespread formal organizational practice that emulates NLP's
technique of modeling is the process of Industry Bench Marking. Though this
process can be highly numbers oriented, the basic process involves identifying
superior performances in critical activities as observed from both competitors and
non competitors. Potential sources and opportunities for observing these superior
performances are trade journals, consultants, professional meetings, visits to other
organizations who have improved techniques or methods, and participating in
either internal or external apprenticeships.
Another NLP technique that attempts to help the employee do his or her
best work is the process Matching of Outcomes with specific results. Here, the
manager helps die employee visualize the specific results of the desired outcome
by framing these results in sensory terms. The NLP assumption is that our thought
processes affect our outcomes. By concretely visualizing the results, the manager
increases his or her chances that the employee will believe that these results are
attainable. Similarly, the idea proposed by L. Thayer suggests that how we define a
problem or situation affects the outcome, where die problem we name is the

91

problem we set out to solve. These ideas focus on the power of the individual's
perceptions in describing the situation, problem, or experience. NLP works with
this concept of subjectivity by defining outcomes in concrete terms meaningful to
the individual, so that the NLP client can visualize these outcomes, and,
subsequently, identify these outcomes as being achievable.
Finally, Control Theory stresses die importance for both the manager and
employee in creating a personal picture of quality. Without this persona/picture
of qualify, die drive to fulfill die employee's basic need to gain acceptance and
recognition through doing qualify work will not exist. Likewise, the manager needs
to have the employee, who is a producer of quality work, in his or her personal
picture book. When the manager incorporates this personal picture of his or her
employee doing qualify work, he or she will be more likely to treat their employee
as a valuable rather than expendable resource. This concept of die manager also
having a personal picture of the worker producing qualify work is crucial for the
success of involvement attempts by die manager with his or her employee.
Involvement of the superior with his or her subordinate is die foundation of RT.
For a manager can not become involved with his or her employee when he or she
doesn't believe that this employee is a valuable resource. This belief of whether or
not the employee is a valuable resource profoundly affects all of the helping
practices in both NLP and RT.

92

CATEGORY IV:
FROM THE TIME WORKERS ARE HIRED, LEAD-MANAGERS WILL
GUIDE THE PROCESS OF HELPING THEM LEARN TO
CONTINUALLY EVALUATE THEIR WORK. THEN, BASED ON THIS
ON-GOING SELF-EVALUATION, LEAD-MANAGERS WILL
ENCOURAGE WORKERS TO IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF WHAT
THEY DO.
Category IV contents:
This content category contains Reality Therapy's method for working towards
more successful identities and outcomes at work. RT provides practical
framework that the manager can utilize to assist in his or her employee's work
evaluations. Control Theory gives an explanation for why these practices work
toward assisting the employee achieve more successful results. NLP also gives the
manager a tool for helping his or her employee discover new ways of perceiving
his or her work in this self-evaluation process.
1. Control Theory claims that by giving die workers control over their jobs, die
manager is assisting his or her employee attempts to fulfill a basic need for power.
Glasser’s (1994) fundamental assertion is that "We all want to have a sense
of control over what we choose to do (p.59)." Glasser maintains that the worker
will strive for fulfilling this need for power by whatever means the worker believes
he or she has. If die employee can't or chooses not to work on fulfilling this need

93

for power, Control Theory predicts that sooner or later the employee's physiology
will react. That is when the worker is unsuccessful or denies this need for power in
his or her thinking, acting, or feeling, components of his or her total behavior, then
the worker's physiology will attempt to fulfill the need. Glasser describes head
aching and other stress-related maladies as an active verb because these stressrelated inflections are attempts for fulfilling the basic need that the person has not
addressed through die other components of his or her total behavior.
Conversely, the results of not giving employee's control of their work can be
seen in die outcomes produced by die boss-manager. The boss-manager, who
directs and mandates the worker through use of threats and punishments, produces
complacency in her or his workers. Often, workers in these circumstances will do
just enough to get by and not be noticed. In this case, the boss-manager doesn't
want the employee's input, and, subsequenfly, the employee's sense of ownership
of her or his job suffers. However, when die employee is responsible for
continually evaluating and improving his or her work, die employee's attempts to
fulfill this need for power in his or her work is more likely to be successful.
2. Reality Therapy provides a framework for the manager to assist die employee
with his or her self-evaluation and quality improvement efforts.
Glasser stresses that die manager must first become involved with her or his
employee before attempting to help die employee. After die manager achieves
rapport with his or her employee, he or she can then guide the subordinate through
the four steps of Reality Therapy. These four steps of RT involve die manager
assisting the employee in:

94

1. How to look at the employee's goal, objectives, and wants.
2. How to look at what die employee is doing for meeting these goals.
3. How to evaluate if what die employee is doing is producing these goals,
objectives, and wants.
4. How to make realistic plans to achieving these goals (refer to pgs. 11-13).
The manager guides the employee through this process by asking such
questions as, "Is what you are doing (total behavior) now helping? If not, what can
you do (action) specifically to help achieve your goals? " The RT method revolves
around die idea that the employee will have a greater chance of success in fulfilling
these goals by focusing on the acting component of his or her behavior. After
evaluating her or his actions and work efforts, this employee next needs to find
alternative ways of doing (either acting or thinking about) his or her job that will
work towards more successful results.
3. The NLP Association Shift Technique assists the subordinate in her or his selfevaluation and quality improvement efforts.
The Association Shift Technique assists the subordinate in self-evaluating by
having the subordinate view his or her work through other perspectives. In
implementing this technique, the manager first asks the employee to describe his or
her work. This description from the employee's viewpoint is die 1st shift of this
technique, and is the "I" perspective.
Next, the manager asks the subordinate to describe his or her work as seen
through the eyes of other workers. This 2nd shift relies on the worker objectively

95

looking at her or his job, and entails the worker to evaluate from the "they"
perspective.
Finally, the manager directs this employee to describe his or her work from
a third perspective. This 3rd shift involves the employee evaluating his or her work
from flie perspective of what she or he sees when standing outside of his or her
self looking at his or her work. This concept of standing back to watch what you
are doing, how you handle situations, and the results you achieve is the 3rd shift, is
for encouraging the employee to look at his or her job or work-related activity "as
if' he or she is seeing it for the first time. This technique may uncover long­
standing patterns, habits, and attitudes for examination. The possibility here is that
some of these habits or long-standing patterns may not be applicable anymore or
as effective as they once were in the present job situation. The goal is for die
employee to try to become as objective as possible. Information in this 3rd shift is
for acquiring feedback that can help the worker adjust his or her actions.
The idea of this Association Shift Technique is to assist the worker in
evaluating by helping he or she get past personal feelings and preconceived
attitudes so that this employee can understand other's perceptions of how he or she
is performing. The employee can gain insight into her or his work through each of
these perspectives. This insight may give the employee information about his or
her worker that he or she hasn't seen before. This technique goes hand-in-hand
with die RT method. The manager can then use these insights from the employee
to help with the RT question of, what am I doing now and is what I am doing now
helping.

96

CONCEPTUAL ANALYSIS
RT only has a chance for helping file worker find more effective alternatives
of actions, if die worker takes responsibility for her or his actions and work
products. Control Theory explains why taking responsibility and control of his or
her job feels good to the employee. Good feelings result, states Glasser, when the
employee is responsible and takes control of his or her job, because he or she also
works toward fulfilling his or her basic need for power and recognition.
However, file case may be that file subordinate does not always have a lot of
control of his or her job. Even if the subordinate's immediate superior utilizes leadmanager practices, the organization (on a macro-level) may still hamper file
employee's work alternatives. Organizational rules, culture, and its inherent
structure can serve to restrict an employee in his or her choices of appropriate
organizational behavior. For example, resource allocations, job descriptions, and
dependency on other groups, who have conflicting goals, may limit employee's
work alternatives. In this case, where file organization places limits on the worker,
the manager can help him or her take responsibility and control in file areas over
which he or she does have jurisdiction. Oftentimes, larger organizational issues can
frustrate, and, subsequently, influence employees attitudes on die job. RT, here,
can assist tins employee in conceiving and implementing new plans of action for
dealing with the frustration and stress. Even when file worker has limited
legitimate power, as defined by file organization, the manager and the worker can
find more successful alternatives of action through RT. Inherent in the RT method
is file maxim; one always has control of his or her own actions. The manager uses

97

this idea to reinforce that even if die organization limits the employee's work
possibilities, there are always some aspects of his or her job where change and
control is possible.
The problem of organizational rules, structure, and cultural influences is that
they can affect the worker's altitude. When employees have a negative attitude
about her or his work, oftentimes, die problem magnifies and becomes pervasive,
affecting most aspects of his or her work and interactions within the organization.
RT assists the employee in changing attitudes, when they become negative or
hamper the employee, by helping the employee to find other alternatives of action.
RT works by having the subordinate "acting as if." Glasser explains that by
changing the employees alternatives of action, die employee can change his or her
feelings, and thoughts about die job. In Glasser’s car analogy the front wheel is the
action component of die person total behavior, he metaphorically illustrates the
person driving down another road when this front wheel changes direction.
For example, Rich, a customer service representative, is having difficulty
with his customer ratings. After reviewing his own work through NLP and RT
methods, Rich admits that the reason his customers express dissatisfaction (or his
work isn't matching his picture of quality) is because of his attitudes (or what he is
presently doing to turn offhis customers). He realizes after associating and
viewing different perspectives (Association Shift technique) that he is frequentiy
abrupt and sometimes even nasty to his customers. Through this self examination,
Rich discovers that his attitude about his job is preventing him from doing a good
job. This attitude, he reflects, is bom of frustration about the organizational rules
and procedures. Last year, Rich applied for a better position. Rich's application

98

was rejected because he didn't have enough experience or service for the new
position. Rich, feeling that he can do more than what he is presently doing, now
views his job as beneath him.
Rich's boss, Tom, after actively listening to Rich's evaluations, suggests that
Rich can only achieve his picture of quality work if he changes his feelings. Tom
points out that Rich’s attempts for promotion are unlikely to be successful with his
present work record. If Rich is serious about being promoted, Tom suggests, then
changing his attitudes would better serve him. Tom's advice to Rich is to "act as
if." Even though Rich's feelings about the job are the same, Rich and Tom work
out a plan of action for helping Rich to "act as if' he's devoted to his job and is
striving to do his work better. This plan includes Rich working on his phone and
interpersonal skills with Rich practicing to be as sincerely courteous as possible. In
order to help Rich with communication and interpersonal skills, Tom sends Rich to
a workshop and teams Rich with someone who excels in this area The plan of
action for changing Rich's attitudes and feelings, which are more conducive for
building good customer relations, entails that Rich not only be cognizant of how he
is treating people, but, also, through the use of modeling and training, shows Rich
new ways to handle his customers. Finally, Rich's commitment to this plan or
finding another plan if this plan is not effective is crucial for Rich's success.
RT and NLP attempt to assist the manager in guiding his or her subordinates
out of the negative cycle of blaming others for their work and in turn being
frustrated when he or seems to have lost control of this work. When die worker
accepts RT, NLP, and Control Theory principles, die worker can no longer blame
or abdicate his or her responsibilities. This employee's sense of personal

99

satisfaction and approval of die manger in turns motivates him or her for
continuing to be responsible for quality work.

CATEGORY V:
QUALITY WORK ALWAYS FEELS GOOD.
Category V content:
This final content category summarizes the "why," according to Control Theory,
these preceding practices and principles help managers in their efforts to assist
their employees work toward more successful work identities.
I. Control Theory explains why quality work always feels good.
Quality work, as defined by Control Theory, is "anything we do or leam that
is highly satisfying to one or more of our basic needs (Glasser, 1994, p.59)."
Quality work, Glasser maintains, feels good to the worker because when the
worker is successfully doing quality work, this worker is also successful in his or
her attempts to fulfill the basic needs of belonging, power, and recognition in his
or her job. Because the worker is the only person who can fulfill his or her basic
needs, what the manager is offering to the worker is an opportunity. When the
employee views this opportunity for assuming responsibility and control of his or
her work, as a needs-satisfying opportunity, the lead-manager has a better chance

100

of tiiat employee doing quality work. Thus, the motivation for doing quality work
is an intrinsic motivation.

CONCEPTUAL ANALYSIS
This final content analysis category concludes with the "why." "Why" the
principles and method of RT and NLP can be successful for affecting change.
Control Theory explains that the "why" is that the employee feels good when he or
she has successfully fulfilled his or her basic needs at work. The first ingredient
necessary in attempting to fulfill these basic needs is the worker's cooperation and
agreement that doing quality work is a needs-satisfying opportunity.
Communication is the vehicle for achieving this agreement. After
establishing rapport and trust from his or her employees, the manager can attempt
to communicate and present this opportunity. Oftentimes, the manager may
discover that his or her employee has a not so attainable and ineffective personal
picture of what quality is or how die worker can fulfill his or her needs at work. In
these cases, after establishing a relationship with the employee, the manager can
use the other RT and NLP techniques and methods outlined in the previous
categories for finding other alternatives of action, expanding die limits
preconceived by the employee, and helping the employee reframe her or his
perceptions of work and her or his work situation.

101

RESEARCH SUMMARY
The content analysis in this thesis identifies a number of NLP, RT, and
Control Theory techniques, methods, and principles that managers can utilize for
improving their subordinate communication relationship. Following each content
category, that sorts these specific ideas, the conceptual analysis discussed file
implications of each for managerial communication. In summary file specific NLP,
RT, and Control Theory techniques, methods, and principles are:
CATEGORY IThis category illustrates practices that a manager can use for creating a warm and
supportive environment.
Contents:
NLP1. NLP's Primary Representational Sensory (PRS) Matching and
Mirroring facilitates the manager's rapport building with his or her subordinates.
2. NLP's Matching and Mirroring nonverbal technique increases
identification and rapport building.
RT1. RTs foundation is to develop trust and involvement with subordinate's
by relating as friends.
Control Theory1. Control Theory principle that works toward creating a warm and
supportive environment through the use of non-coercive managerial practices.

102

2. Control Theory principle of when the manager relates to his or her
employee as a friend, he or she contributes to helping his or employee's basis
need for belonging.
CATEGORY IICategory n concerns encouraging workers to contribute to die usefulness of their
work and only asking workers to do work that is useful.
Contents:
NLP1. NLP's technique of Pacing and Leading assist the manager in teaching
his or her subordinate new skills and ideas that contribute to the usefulness of the
employee's work.
2. NLP's principle of sensory acuity and flexibility help the manager in
eliciting feedback, for contributing to the usefulness of the work, from his or her
subordinate.
3. NLP's method of PEGSUS assists die manager in creating useful
meetings.
Control Theory1. Control Theory principle states that when a manager asks for input
from her or his employees, the manager contributes to fulfilling the employee's
basic needs for power and freedom.

103

CATEGORY IllThis category's concern asking and assisting the worker in doing the best he or she
can do.
Contents:
NLP1. NLP's Meta Model of Linguistics assist the manager in guiding his or
her subordinate's examination about what may be holding them back from doing
the best he or she can do.
2. NLP's Modeling technique assist subordinates in discovering new skills
and attitudes for helping diem do the best they can do.
3. NLP's Matching Outcomes technique assists the manager in reframing
die subordinate's goals and objectives so that die subordinate may more concretely
visualize and enhance the belief that these goals are attainable.
Control Theory1. Control Theory principle states that in order for the worker to do the best
he or she can do the manager and employee need to have a personal picture of
quality.
CATEGORY IVCategory IV identifies how the manager can assist his or her subordinate's in selfevaluation and quality work improvement endeavors.

104

Contents:
NLP1. NLP's Association Shift technique help the manager guide his or her
subordinate in viewing the work being done as seen through different perspectives.
RT1. Reality Therapy provides a framework for the superior to facilitate the
subordinate's self-evaluation. This framework looks at die work by examining
what the goals, needs, and current work are and evaluating if what is currently
being done is fulfilling these goals and needs. This evaluation then forms the basis
for a plan of action.
Control Theory1. Control Theory principle explains that why giving the employees
responsibility for self-evaluation and doing quality work is a need's (the basic
need for power) fulfilling process.
CATEGORY VCalegoiy V concerns explaining why the preceding techniques, methods, and
principle assist the manager's attempt in guiding the employee to do quality work.
Contents:
Control Theory1. Control Theory principle that quality work always feels good because
the worker is fulfilling his or her basic needs of belonging, power, and recognition
in his or her job.

105

Summary Chart

NLP techniques,

Reality Therapy

Control Theory

methods

methods, principles

principles

1. PRS Matching and

1. Involvement by

1. Non-coercive

Mirroring

relating as friends

management practices

2. Matching and

2. Reality Therapy

2. Relating as a friend for

Mirroring nonverbals

method for self-

belonging needs

evaluation
3. Pacing and Leading

3. Soliciting employee
input facilitates power
needs

4. Sensory Acuity and

4. Personal Picture of

Flexibility

quality

5. PEGSUS

5. Giving responsibility
for worker for power
needs

6. Meta Model of

6. Quality work always

Linguistics

feels good

7. Modeling technique
8. Matching Outcomes
technique
9. Association Shift
technique

106

VI. DISCUSSION

The purpose of this research is to explore the implications of the identified
NLP, RT, and Control Theory principles, techniques, methods, and practices for
•

|

,

improving superior's communication with his or her subordinates. The categories
used for content analysis are from Glasser’s 1994 book, The Control Theory
Manager, and served as framework for sorting and identifying specific NLP, RT,
and Control Theory principles. The RT, NLP, and Control Theory principles and
methods in each category are:
I. The work environment must be warm and supportive. The workers must
trust the managers.
1. NLP's technique Primary Sensory Representational (PRS) Matching by
assessing language or predicate choices and eye accessing-cues along
with considering context as related to the intended meaning of the
subordinate's communication.
2. NLP technique of Matching and Mirroring involves matching the
communication partner’s nonverbals such as body positions, vocalics,
and breathing patterns for rapport building.
3. RTs foundation of fostering trust, by relating as friends, also works
toward fulfilling the employees need for power and control.
4. The Control Theory principle, dial no coercion is allowed, maintains
that criticism is always destructive to quality work efforts.
5. Control Theory stales that it is necessary to foster a sense of
friendship or trust, in order to fulfill the basic human need of belonging.

107

II. Since quality is always useful, workers should only be asked to do useful work
and should be encouraged to contribute to the usefulness of what is being done.
1. Glasser defines a Control Theory manager as a person who can relate
to his or her employees as a teacher who explains the job and its
usefulness to the organization.
2. NLP technique of Pacing and Leading is a method for teaching
employees new skills, ideas, and concepts that increase die quality and
usefulness of their work
3. The NLP practice of sensory acuity and flexibility assists the manager
in achieving employee understanding and other communication goals.
4. Control Theory states that when the manger encourages her or his
subordinates to give opinions about how they can improve their work and
contribute to the usefulness of what is being done, the manager
helps her or his employees fulfill basic needs.
5. The NLP technique of PEGASUS is a framework the manager utilizes
for holding useful meetings.
III. Workers are asked to do the best they can do.
1. The NLP Meta Model of Linguistics help employees discover and
evaluate those assumptions that may be hindering their work performances.
2. The NLP technique of Modeling helps the employee to do his or her best
work.
3. Control Theory states that in order for an employee to do quality work,
she or he must have a personal picture of quality.

108

4. The NLP technique of Matching Outcomes helps motivate employees to
do their best work.
IV- From the time workers are hired, lead-mangers will guide the process of
helping them learn to continually evaluate their work. Then, based on this on-going
evaluation, lead-managers will encourage worker to improve the quality of what
they do.
1. Control Theory claims that by giving the workers control over their jobs,
die manager is assisting his or her employee attempts to fulfill a basic
need for power.
2. Reality Therapy provides a framework for the manager to assist the
employee with his or her self-evaluation and quality improvement
efforts.
3. The NLP Association Shift technique assists the subordinate in selfevaluating and quality improvement efforts.
V. Quality work always feels good.
1. Control Theory explains why quality work always feels good.
After each content category, the conceptual analysis discussed the
implications and applications of utilizing these prescribed practices in managerial
communication. Thus, the focus of this research is on the practical implications of
these two disciples for answering the questions, how can a manager work toward
improving his or her subordinate communication and why certain theories and
principles of each discipline can affect a positive change in the manager's
communication.

109

ORGANIZATIONAL IMPLICATIONS
As discussed in the literature review, die issue of affecting change is
significantly dependent on die larger organizational culture. This researcher does
not propose that teaching managers the outlined techniques and practices will
necessarily cure all managerial communication ills. Also, tins researcher is aware
of how difficult it is to change an organizational culture or instill practices in
managers that die organizational culture does not facilitate. These techniques and
models are not a quick fix. Facilitating a positive change in the superiorsubordinate communication interaction through training can only be possible if
effectively presented, reinforced and supported over time, and if conditions in the
larger organization are also conducive and supportive to these efforts.
In a strong authoritarian or boss-managed culture, it may be that these
practices will be ill-received. However, in organizational cultures that commit to
change and are open to improving managerial communications, then these outlined
practices may contibute to an improvement. Thus, the focus is to provide a
framework for those organizations whose cultures have already recognized the
value and have moved toward improving manager-employee relations.
The goal of this prescribed managerial communication model is to provide
concrete ways and ideas that will assist the manager in his or her efforts in
improving subordinate communication interactions. Even if out of habit or
comfort concerns, a manager is unable or unwilling to adopt all of these
suggestions and uses whatever practice or practices that is comfortable to him or

110

her for increasing rapport and trust levels, he or she will have benefited from this
model.

THE PROCESS OF CHANGE
Change or improvement through applying NLP and RT practices is a
combination of both representational and constitutive ways of thinking, feeling,
and doing. Representational constructs are those principles contained in NLP, RT,
and Control Theory drat propose the pre-conceived categories that attempt to
identify die communication partner's way of perceiving, interpreting, and acting.
Examples of these representational categories in NLP are the ideas of processing
information through a predominate sense (PRS), identifying PRS's through specific
eye-accessing cues, and uncovering indexical grammar cues (Meta Linguistics
Model). The Control Theory premise also representationally categorizes basic
needs and the influences these basic drives have on our total behaviors.
These representational constructs work in conjunction with constitutive
practices. Representational constructs help us make sense of the world, with the
practice of ordering and judging experiences being innate in our humanness. These
constructs are for assisting the manager in identifying his or her subordinates "map
of the territory" so drat he or she can work toward building rapport and trust. RT
and NLP caution against making judgments without checking with the
communication partner and die particular context or situation.
If these representational ideas, which reflect our past experiences and biases,
are left unchecked the old ways of knowing, doing, thinking, and feeling will be

111

reified. Constitutive ways of knowing and discovering allow other ideas and truths
to evolve. Constitutive truths revealed by both participants, the manager and
employee, are specific to that interaction. RT and NLP are to be the framework for
tiie process of change, with each participant evolving new truths or new ways of
thinking, feeling, and doing out of the communication interaction through using
these representational frameworks to guide the process of discovery. Therefore,
these individual truths and outcomes will be unique for each manager-employee
interaction.
For example, in the Meta Model of Linguistics, the manager identifies
possible deleterious assumptions of his or her subordinate by observing certain
language choices. The superior does not judge whether or not these assumptions
actually represent detrimental assumptions. The superior only identifies possible
harmful assumptions or incidences of detrimental generalization, deletion, and
distortion so that the subordinate can uncover new ways of looking at the situation
or correct the manager’s observations. This NLP practice works to identify
possible hampering beliefs so that the manager and employee through their
communication interaction can constitutively expand limits or discover other
alternatives.
Individual managers need to adapt these practices to his or her own style
and circumstance. These techniques and methods are dynamic processes for
changing and are for rearranging as the interaction dictates. The manager can
utilize NLP and RT as a vehicle for improving his or her relationship and assisting
his or her employee's job improvement attempts.

112

FURTHER RESEARCH
Suggestions for further research are to conduct a pilot study for ascertaining
whether or not any of these presented ideas can effect a positive change in
managerial communication. Such as pilot study could involve utilizing four groups
from two different organizations. Two groups from each organization, trained
through a generic communication program, serve as die control groups. The other
two groups, again, one from each organization, receive managerial communication
training containing these outlined practices. Each group completes a pre-test and a
post-test for examining any possible effects of these training sessions.
Longitudinal studies could include testing these groups over a period of time
to examine if the participants and his or her subordinates still report changes or
insights gained from the training sessions. Longitudinal studies may broaden
understanding about whether or not the prescribed NLP and RT communication
training program can contribute to any significant, long-term, and positive
changes.
Several factors could influence this study, such as the particular
organizational cultures involved, how long the managers have been at die
organization, how effectively are the ideas presented, how much training the
managers receive, and whether or not the organization or trainer reinforces the
ideas and practices through follow-up with additional materials and training
sessions. Future studies can vary each of these variables for ascertaining if this
prescribed model is effective, when is it most effective, what is the optimum time

113

for training, what is the best way to present these ideas, and what circumstances
are most conducive for die success of this program.
SUGGESTIONS FOR TRAINING PRPGK AM TMPT .F.MENTATIQNS
An organization can institute training workshops for introducing new
managers or managers who are changing positions. The idea is that the manager’s
position change may help him or her to be more receptive to new ideas. The
organization should carefully consider whether or not it should have the program
voluntary or mandatory. An alternative to mandating the program, is to train those
managers, who appear to be more resilient to the idea of being trained for
communication, more informally. Informal training may be one-on-one coaching
sessions over a longer period of time.
The success of any training program depends on how the trainer presents the
ideas. The more die trainer works at gaining rapport with his or her managers, die
better chance the trainer has for gaining acceptance. Also, die trainer should relate
and teach these techniques and methods using easy to understand language that is
comfortable for die trainees. This prescribed managerial communication training
program will be more effective if the trainer presents die material through
identifiable examples. The trainer also will have a better chance for success if he or
she illustrates how by using these methods individual managers and his or her
employees will benefit. A win-win situation perceived by die managers increases
interest and possibly motivation for incorporating practices learned into their
communication interactions.

114

CONCLUSION
In conclusion, though it may seem to be a hopeless cause to train manager
how to communicate more effectively, our organizations seem to sorely need
efforts in this direction. This researcher proposes that just because die deck may be
stacked away from this goal, programs should be in place for assisting those
organizations who indeed are ready to try. Even though success for such a training
program depends on many ingredients, those organizations who commit
themselves to this mission may truly benefit from this outlined managerial
communication model. When organizations realize that their economic success
and perhaps survival is closely tied to the success of their managers in facilitating
quality work from their employees, then the time for such a program may be right

115

REFERENCES
Adler, H. (1992). NLP: Managing a revolution. Management Decision. 30(51
58-62.
Arnold, C.C., & Bowers J.W. (1984). Perception and Meaning. Handbook of
Rhetorical and Communication Theory. Boston: Allyn and Bacon, Inc.
Andreas, C., & Andreas, S. (1987). Change your mind — and keep the change.
Moab, Utah: Real People Press.
Badzinski, D.M., & Gill G. (1994). Discourse features and message
comprehension. Communication Yearbook 17. Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage.
Bandler, R, & Grinder, J. (1975). Structure of Magic I. Palo Alto, Ca. :
Science and Behavior Books.
Banmen, J. (1982). Reality Therapy research review. Journal of Reality
Therapy. 2(1128-32.
Barton, M.G. (1990). Manage words effectively. Personnel Journal. 69(1130-40.
Bell, M.A. (1983). A research note: The relationship of conflict and linguistic
diversity in small groups. Central States Journal. 34(21 128-133.
Betts, N.C. (1988, May). Neuro-Linguistic Programming: The new eclectic
therapy. Paper presented at tire annual spring conference of the Ohio
Association for Counseling and Development, Columbus.
Brooks, M. (1991). The power of business rapport. New York: Harper
Collins.

116

Bruce, W. (1986). Reality Therapy proven to be an effective management
strategy: A report of a computer model. Journal of Reality therapy, 5(2),
15-24.
Burke, K. (1962). Rhetoric of Motives. Berkely, Ca University of California.
Cahn, D.D. (1986). Perceived understanding, supervisor-subordinate
communication, and organizational effectiveness. Central States
Journal.
37(1119-26.
Childers, J.H. (1985). Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Enhancing teacherstudent communication. The Journal of Humanistic Education and
Development. 24(11.14-19.
Chomsky, N. (1972). Language and mind. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanich.
Connor, A.L. (1990). Building internal communication. Public Relations
Journal. 46(61. 29-33.
Daastoor, B. (1993). Speaking their language. Training & Development 47(61.
17-20.
Daniels, T.D., & Spiker, B.K.. (1991). Communication and organizational culture.
In T.D. Daniels, & B.K. Spiker (Eds.), Perspective on Organizational
Communication. 2nd ed. (pp. 119-134). Dubuque, la: Wm. C. Brown.
Dilts, RB., Grinder, J., Bandler, R, Bandler, L.C., & DeLozier, J. (1980)
Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Volume I- the study of the structure
of subjective experience. Cupertino, Ca: Meta Books.
Dilts, RB. (1983). Applications of Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Cupertino,
Ca: Harper Collins.

117

Drummond, R.J. (1982). Determinants of attitude toward Reality Therapy.
Journal of Reality Therapy. 1(2), 22-25.
Ducan, R.C., Konefal, J., & Spechler, M.M. (1990). Effect of Neuro-Linguistic
programming on self-actualization as measured by die Personal Orientation
Inventory. Psychological Reports. 66(31 1323- 1330.
Ekman, P., & Freisen, W. (1969). The repertoire of nonverbal behavior:
Categories, origins, usage, and coding. Semiotica. 1. 49-98.
Einspruch, E.L., & Forman, B.D. (1985). Observations concerning research
literature on Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Journal of Counseling
Psychology. 32(41589-596.
Ellis, D.G. (1994). Codes and pragmatic comprehension. Communication
Yearbook 17. Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage.
Falzett,W.C. (1981). Matched versus unmatched primary representational
systems and their relationship to perceived trustworthiness in a counseling
analogue. Journal of Counseling Psychology. 28(41
305-308.
Fromme, D. K., & Daniell, J. (1984). Neuro-Linguistic Programming examined:
Imagery, sensory mode and communication. Journal of Counseling
Psychology. 31(31387-390.
Geronilla, L. (1989). Neuro-linguistic Programming compared to Reality
Therapy. Journal of Reality Therapy. 9(1113-19.
Giles, H., Mulac, A., Bradac, J.J. & Johnson, P. (1987) Speech
accommodation theory: The first decade and beyond. Communication
Yearbook 10. Newbury Park, Ca.: Sage.

118

a

A

Glasser, N. (1982), What are doing? How people are helped through Reality
Therapy. Perennial Library: Harper & Row.
Glasser, W. (1994). The Control Theory Manager. N.Y., N.Y.: Harper
Collins.
Glasser, W. (1984). Control Theory. A new explanation of how we control our
lives. Perennial Library: Harper & Row.
Glasser, W. (1965). Reality Therapy: A new approach to psychiatry. Perennial
Library: Harper & Row.
Gonring, M.P. (1991). Communication makes employee involvement work. Public
Relations Journal. 47(11140-38.
Gray, G. (1991). Tools for the trade: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the
art of communication. Federal Probation. 37(21.11-16.
Greene, C. (1972). Relationships among role accuracy, compliance,
performance, evaluation, and satisfaction with managerial dyads.
Academy of Management Journal. 15. 205-216.
Gumm, W.B., Walker, M.K., & Day, H.D. (1982). Neuro-Linguistic
programming: Method or myth? Journal of Counseling Psychology. 29(31
327-330.
Hall, E.T. (1976). Bevond culture. Garden City, N.Y.: Doubleday.
Hammer, A.L. (1983). Matching perceptual predicates: Effect on perceived
empathy in a counseling analogue. Journal of Counseling Psychology. 30(21
172-179.

119

Harre, R (1994). Is there still a problem about the self? Communication
Yearbook 17. Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage.
Hams, C. (1992). NLP: A pathway to personal effectiveness. Personnel
Management. 24(71.44-48.
Hatfield. J„ & Huseman, R (1982). Perceptual congruence about
communication as related to satisfaction: Some moderating effects of
individual characteristics. Academy of Management Journal. 25. 349-358.
Hoglund, R G. (1993). Made in Japan: Deming is management principles.
Journal of Reality Therapy. 12(2). 14-19.
Hunt, E., & Agnoli, F. (1991). The whorfian hypothesis: A cognitive psychology
perspective. Psychological Review. 98(31. 311-391.
Infante, D.A. (1978). Similarity between advocate and receiver: The role of
instrumentality. Central States Speech Journal. 24.187-193.
Infante, D.A. (1988) Arguing constructively. Prospect Heights, 111: Waveland
Press, Inc.
Infante, D.A., & Gorden, W.I. (1991). How employees see the boss: Test
of an argumentative and affirming model of supervisor's communication
behavior. Western Journal of Speech Communication. 55(31.294-303.
Infante, D.A., Rancer A.S., & Womack, D.F. (1993). Building communication
theory (2nd ed.I. Prospect Heights, 111.: Waveland Press, Inc.
Jablin, F.M. (1979). Superior-subordinate communication: The state of die art.
Psychological Bulletin. 86(61.1201-1222.

120

King, S.S. (1986). The relationship between stress and communication in the
organizational context. Central States Journal 37(11. 27-35.
Konefal, J., Ducnan, RC., & Reese, M.A. (1992). Neuro-Linguistic
programming training, trait anxiety, and locus of control. Psychological
Reports. 70(301. 819-832.
Korzybski, A. (1933). Selections from science and sanity. Lakeville, Conn.: The
International Non-Aristotelian Library.
Korzybski, A. (1951). The role of language in the perceptual process. In
RR Blake & G.V. Ramsey (Eds.), Perception: An approach to personality.
N.Y., N.Y.: The Ronald Press Company.
Lewis, B., & PuculekF. (1990). Magic of NLP demystified: A practical guide
to communication and change. Portland, Or.: Metamorphous Press.
Likert, G., & Seashore, C. (1963). Making cost control work. Harvard
Business Review. 41. 96-108.
Luria, A. R (1976). Cognitive development It's cultural and social foundations.
Cambridge, Mass.: Harvard University Press.
Pinkley, RL., &Northcraft, G.B. (1994). Conflict frames of reference:
Implications for dispute and outcomes. Academy of Management
Journal. 37(41 193-205.
Russell, C.G., & White, J.C. (1993). Linguistic virtual reality: Is there no way
out? ETC.: A Review of General Semantics. 50(21 155-157.
Parish, T.S. (1988). Helping college students take control of their lives.
College-Student-Joumal. 22(11 64-69.

121

Schall, M. S. (1983). A communication-rules approach to organizational culture.
Administrative Science Ouartlev. 28, 557-581.
Schemdlen, G.W., McCormick, D.W. & Wodlt, A.L. (April, 1987). Neuro­
linguistic programming, matching sensory predicates, and rapport. Paper
presented at the annual meeting of the Western Psychological Association,
Long Beach.
Schnake, M.E., Dumler, M.P., Cochran, D.S., and Barnett, T.R (1990).
Effects of differences in superior and subordinate's perceptions of
superiors' communication practices. The Journal of Business
Communication. 270), 37-49.
Smith, A.L. (1992) Getting mangers off their butts and into the communication
game. Communication World. 9(11. 32-37.
Smith, A.L. (1990). Bridging the gap between employees and management. Public
Relations Journal. 46(111. 20-24.
Strom, J.V. (1974). Implications of William Glassefs Reality Therapy for
behavior change in participation training group members: A trainer role
behavior model. (Doctoral dissertation, Indiana University, 1974).
Dissertation Abstracts, 35(10A) 6428.
Torres, C., & Katz, J.H. (1983, February). Neuro-Linguistic Programming:
Developing effective communication in the classroom. Paper presented
at the annual meeting of die Association of Teachers and Educators,
Orlando.
Vygotsky, L.S. (1962). Thought and language. Cambridge, Mass.: M.I.T. Press.

122

Waldron, V.R. (1991). Achieving communication goals in superior-subordinate
relationships: The multi-functionality of upward maintenance tactics.
Communication Monographs. 58(31289-307.
Weick, K.E. (1976). Educational organizational as loosely coupled systems.
Administrative Science Quarterly, 21,1-16.
Weisburgh, M. (1990). Using NLP to focus on learners. Training &
Development Journal. 44(11121-25.
Wexley, K., Alexander, R., Greenwalt, J., & Couch, M. (1980). Attitudinal
congruence and similarity as related in interpersonal evaluations in
manager-subordinate dyads. Academy of Management Journal. 23.
320-330.
White, M., Crino, M., & Hatfield, J. (1985). An empirical examination of the
parsimony of perceptual congruence scores. Academy of Management
Journal, 28, 732-737.
Whorf, B.L. (1956), Language, thought and reality. Cambridge, Mass.: M.I.T.
Press.

123

appendix

SECTION 1

REALITY THERAPY & CONTROL THEORY
DIAGRAMS, CHARTS, AND COUNSELING SHEETS

Reprinted doss moteriolInterpersonol Communication* Dr. Bert Miller

failure identity.
Not In offoctlvo control
of our lift
WEAKNESS
IRRESPONSIBILITY

WOK). LEW

THE BASIC CONCEPTS OF
REALITY THERAPY
BCTTV MMAyioiir

Q

SURVTAL
■CHADORS
SYMPTOM
BEHAVIORS

NEtunvor
ADOtCTEO
BEHAVIORS

SUCCESS IDENTITY
In effective control
of our lift
STRENGTH
FLEXIBLE .MORE EFFECTIVE BEHAyioa5^>
RESPONSIBILITY
SELF-DISCIPUNE

GIVE UP
BEHAVIORS

Fosmvfur
SECURITY
KMAVI0R3

BEHAVIORS
Bvlonglng—Low (Coop.) ^
Gaining Power and
Recognition (Compl.)

ll*NMUM

j Njjjljll
On*f«. Food,

RimUJNO
BEHAVIORS

Finding
Pleasure
In Failure

Having Fun

a

Being Free

Cost of Intensive Werfcs is now $425
IA base Certification Weeks dre $460
THE PRACTICE OF REALITY THERAPY
Counselors should be aware that reality therapy is an ongoing process made up of two major components: (1) the counseling
environment and (2) specific procedures that lead to changes In behavior. The art of counseling Is to weave these compo­
nents together In ways that lead clients to evaluate their Hves and decide to move In more effective directions.
THE COUNSEUNG
Tt&s counselor should attempt to create a supportive environment
within which clients can begin to make changes in their ttves. To cre­
ate this environment counselors should conslstentlyi
Be friendly and listen to their clients' stories. It Is Important that counselors
be perceived as people who are not overwhelmed by clients' situations and
who have confidence that they can help their clients find more effective
ways to fulfill their needs.
Try not to allow clients to talk about events In the past unless these events

ENVIRONMENT
can be easily related to present situations,
Avoid discussing clients' feelings or physiology as though these were sepa­
rate from their total behaviors. Always relate them to their concurrent
®ctlons and thoughts over which clients have more direct control,
Accept no excuses for Irresponsible behavior. This relates particularly to
clients not doing what they said they would do.
Avoid punishing, criticizing or attempting to* protect clients from the reasonable consequences of their behavior.

THE PROCEDURES THAT LEAD TO CHANGE
Counselors must be sure to use the following specific procedures:
Focus on clients’ total behaviors, that Is. how they are acting, thinking and
feeling now. Help them to learn the difficult lesson that, painful and self­
destructive as these may be. all total behaviors are chosen.
Ask clients what they want now. their present pictures. Then expand this to
the directions they would like to take their lives. If they say they do not
know, continue to focus on what they are doing now (total behaviors) to
make sure that they realize they are choosing their present directions.
The core of reality therapy It to atk clients to make the following evalu­
ation, “Does your present behavior have a reasonable chance of getting
you what you want now and wM It take you In the direction you want to
gor
Usually, clients answer "no", which means that where they want to go is
reasonable but their present behaviors will not get them there. Counselors
should then help them plan new behaviors. For example. "I want to Improve
my marriage but to do so I will have to treat my spouse differently."
Sometimes, they answer "no", but then they seem unable to get where they
want to go no matter how hard they try. Counselors should then ask them to

consider changing directions. For example. "No matter how well I treat my
spouse, he/she is still unloving. It looks Ilka I hava to consider divorce." In
this case, the plan now becomes more to change the direction than the
behavior.
In the rare situation In which they answer "yes", this means that they see
nothing wrong with their present behavior or where they want to go. Coun­
selors should then continue to focus on the clients' present behaviors and
keep repeating the core question in a variety of ways. Be patient, with dif­
ficult clients this may take a while.
Before a plan is attempted, both client and counselor should agree that it
has a good chance to succeed. Once a plan Is agreed upon, ask the client
to make a commitment to the counselor to follow through with the plan.
Clients who make commitments tend to v«rk harder. With young students,
and others at times, a written commitment is generally more effective than
a verbal one.
Do not give up on the client's ability to find a more responsible life, even if
the client makes little effort to follow through on plans. If the counselor
gives up. it tends to confirm the client's belief that no one cares enough to
help.

ACTING BEHAVIORS

THINKING BEHAVIORS

FEELING BEHAVIORS

PHYSIOLOGIC BEHAVIORS

TOTAL BEHAVIORS

ACTING BEHAVIORS
ALWAYS HAVE': THINKING/FEELING/PHYSIOLOGIC COMPONENTS

THINKING BEHAVIORS
ALWAYS HAVE: ACT1NG/FEELING/PHYSIOLOGIC COMPONENTS

FEELING BEHAVIORS
ALWAYS HAVE: ACT1NG/THINKING/PHYSIOLOGIC COMPONENTS

PHYSIOLOGIC BEHAVIORS
ALWAYS HAVE: ACTING/THINKING/FEELING COMPONENTS

BERTA. MILLER

BASIC NEEDS ---- CONTROL THEORY PSYCHOLOGY

LOVE/BELONGING
— Friendship
— Cooperation
— Involvement
— Caring
Relationships
— Connected
1 POWER
rr Importance
— Competition
— Recognition
— Achievement
— Competence
— Respect
— Skills
— Being Heard
— Impact

— Enjoyment
— Pleasure
— Learning
— Relaxation
— Laughter
FREEDOM
- Choices
— Independence
— Options
— Liberty
— Autonomy
— Moving Around
— Physical•
— Psychological

[survival
— Air
— Food
Water
— Body Functions
— Shelter
— Health
— Exercise
— Sox

}•

•• %.
. •• . '

FEELING

..VI-7

*f

* u

HYSIOLOGY
•
•• • •
• ,••• • • • • •
•• • • • • « « • • *, •
• •
•• • <
• t • • •. « • • • • • •
t
. «s •
«
•
•
•. •
«•
• •
< «»

«

2o

2

m
o

CD
m
m
3^
<

o

X)
>

cn
to
m

§
5}
•n

n
o
<

n>

6
z

3

r*

RESPONSIBILITY
1. Responsibility is the ability to fulfill one’s needs, and to do so in such a
way that does not deprive others of fulfilling their needs.
2. A responsible person does that which gives him a feeling that he is
worthwhile to himself and others.
3. Acquiring responsibility is very complicated, a life-long problem.
ability must he learned,

This

4. If a person is not involved with others who care enough about him to
give love and establish discipline, s/he will not learn responsibility
easily.
5. Children “test” with irresponsible behavior. Through discipline
tempered with love, the person learns someone cares.
6. Before an irresponsible person can accept discipline, s/he must feel
certain the counselor cares enough to show him the responsible way to
behave.
7. The counselor often must suffer the pain of the person’s intense anger
by firmly holding the person to the responsible course of action. " If
firmness is not constant, consistent and fair, the person will repeat the
pattern of irresponsibility. •
»

8. A person gains self-respect through discipline and closeness to others
through love. Discipline must contain the element of love which says:
“I care enough about you to expect your best behavior and I know you
can behave in a more responsible way.”
9. The job of the counselor is to help the person explore options for
meeting the basic physiological and psychological needs BELONGING,
POWER, FUN AND FREEDOM in responsible ways without interfering
with other people’s rights to meet their needs.
In summary, we learn responsibility through being involved with other
responsible fellow human beings.

SAMPLE REALITY THERAPY QUESTIONS
Do you want to change?
If you changed how would your life be different?
J'°es If help or hurt you to think that way?
What would you have In your life If you changed?
If you changed how would your life be better?
What would you like In your life that your not getting?
Is what you have been doing working?
Is It getting you what you want?
Would you like to figure out another way to get what you want?
So while you felt like that what did you choose to do?
Does It help or hurt to have negative feelings?
What do you want to do?
What will probably happen If you choose to do that?
What do you do when you're lonely? Angering? Bored? Depressing?
Are you willing to try something else?
Would you like to feel better about yourself?
Do you want to change how you feel? Think? Behave?
How would you like It to be?
What have you been doing to get what you say you want?
Have you read any books about happy people?
What did you do today to feel better?
Does it help or hurt to tell everyone how lousey you feelTWIll it really help
you not to walk? Not to stretch your muscles? not to exercise?
Will lounging around all day in your bathrobe get you what you want?
How would your life to be different It you were thinner? employed?
What is being overweight preventing you; from doing?
If you changed would you feel better?
Pretend that your not depressed - Tell me what you would do.
If you had all those things - tell me what you would have.
Are you satisfied with your relationship with,__________
Are you willing to get along with._______________
.
Would you like to be more in control of your life?
What do people want from you?
What were you thinking, doing, feeling saying then? When?
Describe the last times you had a good laugh.
Was there ever a time you got along with? were happy?
Would it help you to be around more people?
How many jobs have you looked for this week?
Have you ever worked for a volunteer organization? What did you do?
Would it help you to have friends?

HOW TQ ASK. "WHAT DO YOU WANT"
(Ideas and suggestions from workshops- in no particular order;
I.

Things You Can Do
- barter (tell me one thing you want, and 1*11 tell
you one)
- fantasy (pretend you could be anything, etc,)
- one person removed (what would you want for your child;':- listen (people sometimes tell you what they want in rou i
about ways)
- tell the person what you want (give them the idea of t’r.
kind of response you're looking for)
- hold out two articles (nuts and candy) and ask the perr.rr
which one they want (for someone who wants nothing)

!!• Ques tions You Can Ask
-

what is the best thing that could happen to you?
who is your hero?
what do you want to do in 3,5,10 years?
what’s the picture in your head of _______________
did you ever have what you wanted?
? (marriage, husband, •what is the ideal
what do you wish for?
what do you hope for?
what do you dream for?
what’s missin in your life? (in honor of the Houston g:.
what do you dream for?
describe the last time you were happy
what do you dream of?
what's in your mind's aye?
if a miracle happened in your life, what would it be?
(job, boss, lady, et.\
what would be the perfect
AMD SO ON.

III. And in Desperation.

.

- so, you don’t want anything?
- so, you're happy with your life?
- SO, you came in to see me to tell die you have everyth!
you want?
tell me all the things you dor’t want.

E. Perry Good
Reality Therapy C
Houston, Texas
July, 1982

PETER B. APPEL

PRESENT! BEHAVIOR

I. IDEAS ON PRESENT BEHAVTop.
-ALL CHOICES ARE TOTAL BEHAVIORS WITH ALL FOUR COMPONENTS
- PHYSIOLOGY , FEELING , THINKING + ACTING
-WE CHOOSE TOTAL BEHAVIOR IN THE PRESENT
-PEOPLE DO NOT CHOOSE INDIVIDUAL COMPONENTS

-PRESENT BEHAVIOR CONNECTED WITH PROBABLE CONSEQUENCES OF IT CAN BE AN
INDICATION OF WHAT SOMEONE WANTS
-CONNECT TOTAL PRESENT BEHAVIOR TO WANTS AND REALLY WANTS
-LEAVE THE DISCUSSION OF THE PRESENT ONLY FOR DISCUSSION OF PAST SUCCESSES AND
THE CHOICES INVOLVED WITH THOSE SUCCESSES
-CONNECT FEELINGS AND PHYSIOLOGY TO THE THINKING AND ACTING COMPONENTS OVER W*
WE HAVE THE MOST ARBITRARY CONTROL
-CHALLENGE THE PERSON TO DISCUSS THE PROBABLE CONSEQUENCES AS A LINK TO A 7ALU I.
JUDGMENT THAT INCLUDES BOTH NEAR AND FAR CONSEQUENCES
-EMPHASIZE THE PERSON'S FREEDOM, POWER, AND RESPONSIBILITY BY USING SUCH WORDS
AS CHOOSE—WHAT ARE YOU CHOOSING TO DO?
-EXAMINING OUR BEHAVIOR IS DIFFICULT; IT TAKES THE STRENGTH OF INVOLVEMENT TO
AVOID THE PITFALLS OF BLAMING, EXCUSING AND DENYING
II. QUESTIONS:
—WHERE ARE YOU HEADED?
—WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW? WHAT ARE YOU CHOOSING TO DO NOW?
• • • REALLY WANT?
—WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO GET WHAT YOU WANT?
—WHAT DIRECTION IS YOU BEHAVIOR TAKING YOU?
—WHAT ARE YOU .THINKING AND DOING?
— SO, WHILE YOU FELT LIKE THAT, WHAT DID YOU CHOOSE TO DO?
—WHEN YOU GET THE HEADACHES, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING AND DOING?
—WHAT WILL PROBABLY HAPPEN IF YOU CONTINUE TO CHOOSE TO DO THAT?
(IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?)

PETER B. APPEL
WHAT ARE YOU DOING™PRESENT BEHAVIOR

What is the client

currently doing outside counseling to gain power and importance?
• • • to gain acceptance and involvement from others?
• • • to express his/her independence and free will?
• • • to enjoy her/himself, or to learn new things?

What are you doing to give the client power, input, importance, and impact?
• • • to help the client increase a sense of importance,
with others?
• • • to give the client a sense of belonging and warmth?
...to help the client get warmth and belonging frcn
others?
• • • to give the client freedom of choice and a sense of indeper. .
from you?
• • • to help the client become independent of others?
• • • to have fun with the client and help them learn more about
themselves?
• • • to help the client have fun elsewhere in life?
What are you saying or doing that increases the distance between you and the client'.’
>
• • • that makes the client feel unimportant?
• • • that bursts your client's bubbles?
• • • that reminds your client of exterior duty, obligation or rv
• • • that threatens your client's safety or security?

What do you do when you're lonely?

What do you do when your client is lonely.

What do you do when you're feeling helpless?

What do you do when your client fee: :
helpless?

What do you do when you' re bored?

What do you do when your client is borec.'

What do you do when you feel trapped?

What do you do when your client feels tr

What do you do when you're afraid?

What do you do when your client feels af:

PEOPLE’S PLACE COUNSELING CENTER
PLAN SHEET
.CLIENT:

COUNSELOR:

DATE:

SIX STEPS TO GOOD PLAN MAKING
1- ___ SIMPLE • • • not complicated, small step, not self-defeating, (within your ability),
2. ___ SPECIFIC • • • as to what, where, how, when, time duration, etc.
3. ___ A DO PLAN • • •
4. _
Pl“’ ----- TUJ™ENT,,,a plan that depends only upon your own actions, and not other people.
* ----- IMMEDIATE...starts right away or real soon, a NCW plan.
My problem is

tfhat I want is

My plan is

This will meet any need fc
Love/Belonging
____ Power/Importance
____ Fun/Learning
____ Freedom/Choices
____ Safety/Security

Number of days I will do this plan

WHEN PLAN IS COMPLETED, circle ’yes' or 'no' beside each day of week and comment on
feelings and thoughts.
COMMENTS ON FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS
SUN
MON
TUES
WED
THUR
FRI
SAT

YES NO
YES NO
YES__ NO
YES NO
YES NO
YES NO
YES NO
I CHOOSE TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND COMMIT MYSELF TO FOLLOWING MY PLAN.

SIGNATURE:
WITNESS:

*

appendix

SECTION 2

NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING
DIAGRAMS, CHARTS, &
PRS TESTING INSTRUMENT

MERzgELAlII)NEg> of Tllfroire OF PSYQKJI11ERAPY

wmw

FffiUU

Nt

ADLER
1 ••

wautr

•%

S

jVf*

7<*
,v

W*k

J5

;v.

2®S!5B

PfahW/'-w

ra
*•

■

P
*2*™r**
.(./eonfeiwd by V®

JtKJnatal'HE

'»(»Wr

I

£

KpS

•%•

K

\| ROGERS |

BEENE

vi%vvp

*

JUNG

;f CWpJjtffiflkiEHJ i;i;

4

EHIKSON

Ijg» ■ ■! ■

I ■—JhJ

\

is

[

imS

:»fiv

I

1

,'J

I
X/

WOLPE
\

| ski.NJNER |
«

\

•J • ••;€• xE*:

•*•' unrtllft*w- • •.* nr
* .,

:.•• :..> v,fvv:v,,fsfftv.,vl;: \v:•• v• /

;

s

Betts, 1900

APPENDIX 2
•

NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING
SUBJECTIVE INFORMATION
PROCESSING MODEL

ffUmoRY Sox

2*TC*Ntkut.Y CttAUC cVf’dtfifMie

Jjjorvtcvm. Ccustmmq

OULSMT

OWtFttOUC.

OOff SOUUO

c*x Tftnt/umL

0
Neu^olos/cai. Gusteawts

Rounds

Taste 5 ^
Swells

CLKTZtiUfiL SnrtULrrnous

•r

f

*v •*

s
\:

NLP PRIMARY REPRESENTATIONAL SENSORY SYSTEM
7
. •= EXAMPLES OF REPRESENTAITONAL PREDICATE CHOICES ’ J
f

! rVisual
picture
clear
focus
perspective
see
flash

bright
outlook
spectacle
glimpse
preview
shortsighted
discern
distinguish
Illustrate
delineate

Auditory

KiNCSTinme

tune
note
accent
ring

touch

StKHJl

shock

growl
tone
sing
sound
hear
clear

stir
strike
Impress
move

say

Impact

scream
click

stroke

static

rub
crash
smash
sharpen
tangible
crawl
Irritate
tickle
sore
grab
tarry

rattle

paint

ask

cloud
clarify

chord

graphic

harmonize

dress up
show
reveal
expose

key
muffle
voice

amplify

depict

compose
alarm

screen

screech

r.i

handle

throw
finger

hit

grope

tap

flat

REPRINTED FROM:
Brooks, M. (1991). The Power of business rapport. New York:
Harper Collins.

*»

:

t

Eye Accessing Cues

:

» »

Reprinted from
Brooks, M. (1991). The power of business rapport. New York:
Harper’Collins.

*.

I

SSSSS .

»
M

S3 O^ rt.o
°

/O
H

ct Qj p (q <

O CT H-

£ g O O

w
>

*03 P hr> &;
h

O CD

a

5

C
h3 H*tJ h Qj
J O (D

n) r+
» JT
w p O
p
_
a Cl
'

O
3
3
C
3
H*
O
p
rt
H*
0

O
*1
•
••

to P $ H

rd {?.
'
CL XJ
(D C

£

?8s

a
©

'"s ig
B S-S

i

•a © t>

*3

1-2 I

O
■2

o

fcf»

•d

g • *Q C*
w

P O

«q p

% ;
'-3. :
ji

^

lJ

:

o ©

©

gB o w"
5g^ S.^^asr6,
i®

08 aa

•>$ &

i I!i

PM

3 0
CD
W h-»
r+CD.
H* x*

frfi g
«g ^

hr,
»-• hrj
CD • .
Oj
••

^ g S

«I5

> VO

ST

a
O

&
©

P

W

S B c

iw

«l o'

.a

•a

to O

o

i ? av-

w P

o* Hi

O c^

©

Ssf
S £-•

.6

ft

Ul

P

r

►i P

S- j ■

^ 8

&^

o

9
6

:o 2

?• «
3 <

VO

r

1

a

■ssls?
s| t
g.S'12? »“ *

P M O
P
R

’ H-*

6

o

E

B'&

5

s.

&s
O

p.

ft ft-

P

4^

Ol

«1
I

rprs?^
*|8j«e
CT M

f-r »rt

^

£ © o ©^ °

o
tr

E

S'

* * w3

rr p x o

© ^ p x-

p “ S *1
o S'0
rt m

o

Pi®©
■«

fc- P
ft

:P

(fi P

© g.

ss

i
w -rl

s»a & •a <» ^

ra g F g P S

I< R* 8© EG © *t

«« * o * _

?S < 5 "
p •< p.^- p
h^:-w- v:° -w^ §•
P

sr r£ o ^ ^

Hi-fi
P

o S o ^ P-

fl S ’1 sT?«

©

g
M.

p

©

••

3e*
a 8- ?
p - a
,

s P

i S’g-si-i'
^ 2 © 3
3

bc-Orj©5©2^*

gfp0«®PR

ns ?ir
5-148 Ifs

<

»>•.

*< P Vi

o

•— O (A

M-o
sr p ©

©’ g-g W
P £ X.2 5 x

C»lfc!ilSj8
P-Kri» |-| «§•

•=i &
5 S B^P 8 w
if
g gS r.- 8 x-«

'S. J5(5 a. B’^5 a

p

ti

M.

O
J*
►**» 8-H

VS g B W

&

B

B
|w

N c P2C3

S

g-

P

© *r

w 5 Cl °
»
Q B p
n- r © ©

P

">
R.

i B.5©

6 B g
P
•9 ST'lSr
pr

2

3
I.

o

3

►i

-4

PSPS':
pa

$■0 S "2g g * 2
“ 1 B ° •a. H ® " ^

5-H.c^g.

pr»<
p o

•p p
*a

^e-si .2 8 0

cr
s£8
0 “
B’S
»t

to

8 “?

0 B 8

*a © x-

&S^cg

P- to

o *a

- - ©

B&
a ©

© -^ ©

F*1
. to

it to p
•28 fTVJ
to

ca£

•a

s

IT

o »“*•
w

8

p

a*B*
a

a. k

S'
'*
a p «
*s

s P

ffi*

8 S

8 8*

"i
6 -

ar* FlJ
P n

§

©

Ml M

fi-

r**a x

5 to
P

to

B g s-

cr

p fr «

f

CL

S*llP

p

af

* £ {L

g &sr

« S "-8

THE LANGUAGE SYSTEM DIAGNOSTIC INSTRUMENT
Cresenclo Torres
Part One
Instructions: This instrument contains three parts. Part One consists of five sets of three para­
graphs each. For each set, select the one paragraph that is easiest for you to read. Do not
be concerned with the actual content of the paragraph, merely with how you respond to it
compared to the other paragraphs in the set. Read all three paragraphs and then make your
selection, but do not deliberate too long; your first response generally is best. Indicate the
letter of the paragraph that you have selected on your answer sheet by circling the appropri­
ate letter (A, B, or C) for each set.
You have five minutes in which to complete the entire instrument.

1. A. The tinkle of the wind chimes tells me that the breeze is still rustling outside. In the
distance, I can hear the whistle of the train.
B. I can see the rows of flowers in the yard, their colors shining and fading in the sunlight
and shadows, their petals waving in the breeze.
C. As I ran, I could feel the breeze on my back. My feet pounded along the path. The
blood raced through my veins, and I felt very alert.

2c A. I like to be warm. On a cold night, I like to relax by a warm fire in a comfortable
room with a cup of smooth, warm cocoa and a fuzzy blanket.
B. The child talked into the toy telephone as though he were calling a friend. Listening
to the quiet conversation, I could almost hear the echos of another child, long ago.
C. The view was magnificent. It was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.
The panorama of the green countryside stretched out clearly below us in the bright,
sparkling sun.

104;

University Associates

3. A.

hey appcarcd to be surprised when they noticed that there were other people on
the beach. The amazement on their faces turned to eagerness as they looked to see
if they knew any of the people on the sand.

B. I was helped up and supported until I felt my strength coming back. The tingling
sensation that r^ up and down my legs—especially in my calves—was stronger after
I stood up, and my body was extremely warm.
C. People will express themselves more verbally if they can talk about their interests or
assets. You can hear the increased enthusiasm in their conversations, and they usually
become more fluent.

4. A. The feedback that the speaker received was an indication that she was communicating
more effectively. The people in the audience seemed to be in tune with what she was
talking about.
B. I want to understand how people feel in their inner worlds, to accept them as they
are, to create an atmosphere in which they feel free to think and feel and be anything
they desire.
C. Children watch adults. They notice more than we realize. You can see this if you observe
them at play. They mimic the behavior of the grown-ups they see.

5. A. Creative, artistic people have an eye for beauty. They see patterns and forms th^it
other people do not notice. They respond to the colors around them, and their visual
surroundings can affect their moods.
B. They heard the music as if for the first time. Each change of tone and tempo caught
their ears. The sounds soared throughout the room, while the rhythms echoed in
their heads.
C. Everybody was stirred by the deep emotions generated by the interaction. Some felt
subdued and experienced it quietly. Others were stimulated and excited. They all felt
alert to each new sensation.

The 1986 Annual: Developing Human Resources

105

Part Two
Instructions: This part consists of ten sets of items. Each item includes three lists (sets) of words,
or eac item, circle the letter (A, B or C) of the set of words that is easiest for you to read.
Uo not focus on the meanings of the words. Try to work quickly.
6. A. Witness
Look
See

B. Interview
Listen
Hear

C. Sensation
Touch
Feel

7. A. Stir
Sensitive
Husde

B. Watch
Scope
Pinpoint

C. Squeal
Remark
Discuss

8. A. Proclaim
Mention
Acoustic

B. Texture
Handle
Tactile

C. Exhibit
Inspect
Vista

9. A. Scrutinize
Focused
Scene

B. Articulate
Hearken
Tone

C. Exhilarate
Support
Grip

19. A. Ringing
Hearsay
Drumbeat

B. Movement
Heat
Rushing

C. Glitter
Mirror
Outlook

11. A. Dream
Glow
Illusion

B. Listen
Quiet
Silence

C. Motion
Soft
Tender

12. A. Upbeat
Listen
Record

B. Firm
Hold
Concrete

C. Bright
Appear
Picture

106 ;

University Associates

13, A. Feeling
Lukewarm

B. Hindsight
Purple
Book

C. Hearsay
Audible
Horn

14. A. Show
Observant
Glimpse

B. Tfempo
Articulate
Sonar

C. Move
Powerful
Reflex

15. A. Purring
Overhear
Melody

B. Smooth
Grasp
Relaxed

C. Glowing
Lookout
Vision

Muscle

Part Three
This part consists of ten sets of three short phrases each. In each set, circle the letter (A,
B, or C) of the phrase that you find easiest to read. Try to complete this task in the time
remaining.
16. A. An eyeful

B. An earful

C. A handful

17. A. Lend me an ear

B. Give him a hand

C. Keep an eye out

18. A. Hand in hand

B. Eye to eye

C. Word for word

19. A. Get the
picture

B. Hear the
word

C. Gome to
grips with

20. A. The thrill of
the chase

B. A flash of
lightning

C. The roll of
thunder

The 1986 Annual: Developing Human Resources

107

21. A. Outspoken

B. Underhanded

C. Short-sighted

22. A. I see

B. I hear you

C. 1 get it

23. A. Hang in there

B. Bird’s-eye view

C. Rings true

24. A. Clear as a bell

B. Smooth as silk

C. Bright as day

25. A. Look here

B. Listen up

C. Catch this

Vnivtniiy Associate

108

Name
Instructions:

''

KTZS “ -th» *« * “di»* *• •— -•• y ou chose

Part One:
Paragraphs

Part Two:
Words

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.

9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.

Part Three:
Phrases

16.
17.
18.

A
B

B

C

C

C

A

A
B
B

C

A
B
B

C

A
B
A
B
A

C

A

C

C

B

A

C

C

C

B
A

B
A

B
A
B
A
C

B

20.

C

21.

A
B

TOTALS

Tkt 1986 Annual: Dtutloping Human Resourtu

C
C

A
B

19.

22.
23.
24.
25.

A
A
B

C

C

’B

A

C

C

B
A

B
A
B

C

A
B

C

A
B

C

A
B

II.

C

C

A
B

A

C

Ill

109

umns°T; itlnd'lH ?n"thebox ££?

Column I

thCSC th"*

^^

x 4 -

(Actual score)

Column II ,

- x 4 -

(Actual score)

Column III

x 4 -

(Actual score)

3. Multiply each of the column scores by 4. This will give you your actual scores,
4. Chart your actual scores on the graph below by coloring in the space that represents your
actual score in each of the three columns.
0

10

20

30

40

50

60

70

80

90

100

0

10

20

30

40

50

60

70

80

90

100

Column I
Auditory
Column II
Visual
Column III
| Kinesthetic

5. Your highest score indicates the primary mode that you use to interpret and communi­
cate with the world around you. You probably use this mode (auditory, visual, or kinesthetic)
the most, particularly when you are problem solving or in stressful situations.
Your second-highest (middle) score indicates your secondary mode, which you likely
use in everyday conversation, in combination with your primary mode.
Your lowest score indicates your tertiary mode, which you may not use as much as
the other two or at all in your normal conversation. In fact, it often remains at the
unconscious level.
These three modes of perceiving and talking about one’s experiences are called
"language representational systems." A visual person is likely to say "I see" or "That
looks right.” An auditory person is likely to say "I hear you" or "That sounds right."
A kinesthetic person is more likely to say "I’ve got it" or "That feels right." The items
that you selected on this instrument reflected these three systems or ways of describing
experiences.
Each individual seems to be most comfortable in using one or two of these systems.
Some people believe, however, that if an individual could learn to communicate in all
three modes, or systems, he or she could establish more rapport and trust with people
whose primary systems differ from his or her own. Increased ability to communicate in
all three systems thus might lead to increased effectiveness in communication.

110

University Associates

NLP Comprehensive Practitioner Participant Notes
Unit 6, Page 7

Outcome Diagram

!

i

© 1990, Steve & Connirae Andreas,
c/o NLP Comp., 2897 Valmont Road,
Boulder. Colorado 80301

/