,———————

>

Thoug ht For The Day
Smfle, and the world smiles with
you, cry and you cry alone...
-

Fire Investigation
—Continues—

LORILEONARD
ROB FLANAGAN

News Editors
According to Code Enforcement
Officer Charles Felker, the fire
that occurred March 24, at 601 and
603 E. 3rd St., which killed one BU
student and left 10 other homeless
is still under investigation. Conducting the investigation is Fire
Marshall Harry Roadarmel .
Felker stated, "To the best of my
knowledge the house was zoned for
a single family but it may have
been ' grandfathered in '."
However, according to Kay Camplese, who along with her husband,
Prof . Donald Camplese, owned the
building, it was zoned for three
unrelated people. It was not until
the morning of the fire that the
owners found that 11 people had
lived in the building.
Camplese stated that the leases
for both apartments were signed by
three people and that no extra
money had been received. Camplese also said that the only way for

her or her husband to have known
so many people were living there
would have been to search each
bedroom periodically. An act that
she reguarded as a clear invasion
of privacy.
Regulations state that a building
zoned for four or more unrelated
people must contain one smoke
detector and one fire extinguisher.
Felker had no comment as to
whether there was or was not, but
Camplese stated that the structure
did contain both. There are no
specific guidelines as to whether or
not the detector and extinguisher
are requiredJn^..building which
was zoned for only three people.
The house also contained a new
furnace , electrical appliances and
wiring. According to Camplese, the
only thing the officials are sure of is
that the fire was not caused by an
explosion since the back wall had
not been blown out. Camplese went
on to add that she has been told by
officials that the actual cause may
never be determined.

Tricks on skates??? A crowd of students having fun,and tiring themselves out
were at Skatetown, Bloomsburg, on April.2. Mon. April 16, there will be a Free

;

;

*

INSIDE
MONDAY:
-Purgatory
in Bloomsburg
-Hacky
Sack

April 13-14

Annual Reading
Conference Scheduled

Twenty-two educators from
schools and agencies in the greater
Bloomsburg, Berwick, and Danville
areas will be participating in
Bloomsburg University's 20th Annual Reading Conference, Friday
and Saturday, April 13-14.

Chairing or speaking at sessions
on Friday are Debbie Rodes,
Columbia County Association for
Children and Adults with Learning
Disabilities (CCACLD), Bloomsburg; Elsie Harhart and Romaine
Whitelock, Berwick Area School
District; and Jean Knouse,
¦ Danville" Area'School District. '
Participating on Saturday from
the Bloomsburg Area School
District will be Nancy Edwards,
Ronnie Nagel , Patricia A.
Williams, and Don Sachetti.
From the Danville Area School
District are Margaret Richards,
Elaine Pongratz , Jean Knouse, and
Aria Billig.
Other Saturday participants include Kim Hessert, Benton Area

Skating Party beginning at 9 p.m. Purchase tickets at the Information Desk.
Buses will leave from Elwell.
; *•_

School District; Linda Shively,
Southern Columbia Area School
District; Sandra Whitemire ,
CCACLD , Mifflinville ; Kay
Knecht, CCACLD, Orangeville;
and Kay Shulski, North Central
Secure Treatment Unit, Danville.
Bloomsburg University will be
represented in sessions by James
Mullen , Carol Venuro, John
Hranitz, Samuel Slike, and Charlotte Hess.
BU Acting President , Larry
Jones, will give brief remarks at
Friday's general sessions and at
the .evening banquet. Faculty
Emeritus, Boyd Buckingham, will
give the invocation of the latter.
Dean Howard Macauley, college of
professional studies, will offer
remarks at Saturday's general
session
Conference director is BU
Reading Clinic Director Edward
Poostay.
Dr. Lyndon W. Searfoss ,
associate chairperson and
associate professor of the elementary education department of
Arizona State University , will appear before the Saturday morning
general session of the Reading Conference at 8:30 a.m. "Helping 'Outsiders' Become 'Insiders :' What's
the Key to Reading and Writing? ,"
is the topic of Dr. Searfoss ' speech ,
which is part of the two-day conference to be held Friday and
Saturday.
Dr. Searfoss received his
bachelor's degree in elementary
education from West Chester State
College and his master 's and doctorate degrees in reading education
from Syracuse University. He serves on the University Faculty
Senate and has been a member of
the College of Educations
Editorial Board and the Personnel
Committee of the department of
elementary education. He also served as the Elementary Reading
Education Coordinator at Arizona
State.
Dr. Searfoss has performed
( Continued on Page 5)

BLOOM COUNTY
by Berke Breathed

GuestEditorial Letters
The Bloomsburg softball team traveled to South Carolina to play
quality softball against outstanding teams on beautifully maintained
fields. We returned eager to play more quality softball on our own
familiar home field. Instead, we returned to bulldozers and pipes and
piles of dirt haphazardly scattered throughout the field. Where did they
come from? Why are they there?
Obviously, the bulldozers are there to dig up the dirt to put in the pipes.
And apparently the pipes are there to bring added water pressure to the
campus from a water tower on the hill behind Nelson Fieldhouse.
However, the water tower hasn't even been built yet! The pipes are
useless ! Why are they digging up the softball field just as our season is
about to open?
We have a very short season, with the schedule being completed by the
first week of May. How much difference would six or seven weeks have
made if the tower is not even up yet?
Further, neither the athletic department nor the softball coach was
notified of the decision to ruin our field. Perhaps if someone had been told
of the proposed action, it could have been avoided. Instead, the season
has opened and we have yet to practice or play on a softball field. We use
a grassy patch of land and never see a true bounce off of a dirt infield,
never run correctly measured base paths, never throw a pitch off a
mound, never know if a line drive is really foul or fair. In essence, we can
never practice quality softball without a field.
Stripped of our home field, we must travel 20 minutes if we hope to host
any "home" games — so much for the home field advantage. Even once
the pipes are laid, the field will not be playable. The dirt cannot merely be
thrown back in the holes and bulldozers; driven away. The ground will
continue to settle and sink and rain will turn the holes into ditches. The
ditches endanger the safety of the players. Sprained ankles or worse will
be rampant among the team. Why is a quality softball program forced to
endure this lack of consideration? How can we continue to bring national
recognition and acclaim to the university if we do not even have a field on
which to practice?

The Voice Staff
STEPHANIE RICHARDSON
Executive Editor
Managing Editor
News Editors

'

.»

News Assistant
Feature Editors

-.

r

Feature Assistant

Sports Editors
»
Sports Assistant
Advertising Manager
:
Advertising Assistant.
Photo Editor
Photo Assistants
.'
Circulation Manager
Business M a n a g e r s . . . . . : . . . .
Advisor

..'

;

. '.

Ernie Long
Lynne Sassani ,
Lori Leonard , Rob Flanagan
Gary Wessner
Corty Pennypacker,
Nancy Schaadt, Jeff Bachman

John Staman

Wade Douglas, Mike Albright
¦
Marty Hasenfuss
. . . .< .'
Chris Thren
'. . . . . . . . .
Mary Atonl
• Kent Hagedorn
• : Bob Yoder, Brian Creep
. Sarah Hackforth
Neil Renaldi , Mary Mohl
. . . ¦ ¦ ¦ ¦ . . ¦ . ¦ ¦ .. . . . . Richard Savage

An Editor Replies

Dear Editor,
I'd like to reply to the letter of
Mr. Christopher T. Crane in which
he has a few things to say on my
campaign coverage. First, I would
like to thank you. So far you are the
only person who my coverage has
motivated to do anything. I'm flattered despite the fact it was
negative. I was beginning to think
that nobody reads what I write.
I've written enough critical things
this semester that it was about
time that I hade some aimed my
way. If someone has to keep
reading his stuff all the time it
begins to feel like masturbation. A
university is supposed to be a
marketplace of ideas but only you
and I have been firm enough in
ours to share them with others. So
what if I called anybody who supports Ronald Reagan a paranoid,
arrogant greedhead. So what if
you, I assume, think I'm a
bleeding-heart, knee-jerk liberal.
Well actually, I don't think
EVERYBODY who supports

College store
sales up

College stores represent one of the
country 's top-ranking retail growth
markets, according to figures released
by the National Association of College Stores. The typ ical college store
averaged a 9 percent increase in sales
last year over th e previous school
year and showed a 35 percent increase over the past four years. The
gains significantly oufscore ret ailing
in general throu gh the last few years'
recession.
The survey included two-year colleges and lour-year institutions and
ranged fro m stores reporting annual
volume ol less t h a n 5500,000 to those
with sales above S3 million.
Course books increased slightly as
a percentage ol sales in most stores,
contributing from 50 percent of total
net sales in the larger stores to 70 percent in smaller ones. Over the past
f o u r years , college stores have steadil y increased their proportion of used
books sold. -

Ronald Reagan is an arrogant,
paranoid greedhead but I said that
in the hopes that it would needle
someone into a dialogue.
Speaking of a dialogue let me
reply specifically to the things you
said in your letter. Now, as far as
my story being an editorial you're
right. To be exact it was an
"analysis" which amounts to the
same thing. Our only fault here at
the Voice was failing to label it as
such. As far as opinion appearing
on a feature page well here I'm
afraid I'm going to have to claim a
little expertise in this area .
THERE IS NO'LAWWHICH SAYS
AN OPINION HAS TO APPEAR
ON THE EDITORIAL PAGE. It is
merely traditional to place them
there. I have never been a firm
believer in the sacredness of
tradition. I'm only into tradition to
the extent that it serves my purposes.
Lastly, I do not claim to be an expert on politics. I do however read
as much as I can on the subject and
in so doing am unable to prevent
myself from forming ideas about it.
If I am a little more than willing to
share those ideas through the Voice
well what can I say, crucify me; If
you are unaware, let me inform
you, anyone is allowed to write for
the Voice so you have the same opportunity as 1.1 am quivering with
anticipation at the thought of your
reply.
Sincerely,
Jeff Bachman

Attention:
THE VOICE is now accepting staff election applications for fall 1984. Take to Box
97 KUB or THE VOICE offices.
Staff is reminded that elections
will be held Sunday, April 15:

EDB, FDA ai\d
EPA: more than
alphabet soup
Campus Digest News Service

Although it 's taken the Food and
Drug Administration five years to
study the effects of eth y lene
dibromide (more commonly referred
tp.> as the carcinogen EDB), some
strong restraints are now being applied to the pesticide.
First , a l i t t l e b a c k g r o u n d .
Registered with the federal govern ment in 1948, EDB has been used as a
soil treatment before planting for
prevention of root worms. Other uses
include fumigation of citrus and some
vegetables, to prevent spread of
Mediterranean fruit flies and spraying
grain-milling machinery to combatinsects.
.
As earl y as 1974, the National
Cancer Institute issued the first cancer
alert on EDB after lab tests on
animals showed it to be a powerful
cancer-causing chemical. Other tests
showed that EDB could cause birth
defects and reproductive disorders.
So far , there is no solid proof of like
eff ects of EDB on hurrians.
After finding traces of EDB in
Florida groundwater, the EPA banned the use of the chemical as a soil
fumigant last October.
On Feb. 3, they further prohibited
use of EDB on grain products and set
voluntary safe levels in grain-based
food. This lead to widespread
removal of certain foods from
grocery shelves. Although federal
rules require retailers to be told which
foods they buy are EDB-l rented ,
grocers don ' t have pass t h a t
knowledge on to the consumer.
In March , the EPA will decide
whether to ban use of the pesticide on
imported fruit. Although it is no
longer used on domestic fruit , the
Agriculture Department requires the
fumi gation of imported fruit as protection against the fruit fl y. Now,
high EDB levels have been found by
government researchers in both pulp
and skin of imported oranges and
grapefruits.
It could take as lorig as three years
to completely rid the food supply of
EDB-treated grain because of mixing
of grain and the impracticality of
testing every sack or bushel.

^^_^fe\

borne 'states 'have ' adopted- evetv ¦•
stricter rules governing the use of
EDB, such as Massachusetts, which
has banned at least 20 products from
sale. California , too, has pulled a
number of products from the shelves.
The Natura l Resources Defense
Council is seeking even stronger
guidelines for the use of EDB. "We
believe that state guidelines compromise public health. Up to 29 states
have no authority to act ," said
spokesman Al Meyerhoff "on CBS's
"Face the Nation . "
State health officials are not sure
how much EDB is safe to humans.
The EPA has recommended levels of
30 parts per billion in ready-to-eat
foods, 150 parts per billion in partially processed products and 900 parts
per billion in raw grain. Until recently, scientists had believed that EDB
vaporized completely after use as a
fumi gant. EPA tests show that processing and later cooking EDBspra yfltl grain cut down on the
residue.
As may be expected , grain pro cessors are upset with the bans; they
say converting to an alternative treatment could cost the industry and consumers $100 million. EDB is a preferred method because it can be used as
a spot treatment (about S500), as opposed to a genera l fumi gation (about
$4,800) .
There are alternatives to EDB use.
Refrigeration or use of two other
chemicals, methyl bromide and carbon tetrachloride , are more expensive, however.
Another , more popular , choice involves low-level- radiation to kill insects and bact eria. Health anil
Human Services Secretary Margaret
Heckler says radiation leaves no
residue on foods for the consumer.
Radiation also extends the shelf life of'
foods, making it more cost effective.
The federal government has proposed
use of radiation instead of EDB.
The FDA, which classifies irradiation as a food additive, says that it
must first be proven not to cause
cancer. The group is expected to
redefine the radiation method as a
. non-additive in March.
Consumers have until' mid-April to
comment on radiation proposals
before new regulations are approved.
The process could take as long as two
years to become widespread.

International Briefs
"

JERSULEM
April 2: Three Arab terrorists attacked crowds of shoppers with
guns and grenades, wounding 48
people. The attack, which took
place in the central downtown section of the city, was the third major
terrorist attack in Jerusalem in
recent months. A radical
Palestinian group, the Democratic
Front for the Liberation of
Palestine, has taken responsibility
for the attack."

capital of Chandigarh. The killing
was the latest in a series of
terrorist assassinations linked to
the Sikh campaign for greater
autonomy within the government.
At least ten people were killed
when police fired on a crowd of
rioters in Amritsar. Police and
military units have been ordered to
shoot rioters on sight, and to open
fire to disperse "illegal
gatherings."

GUINEA, WEST AFRICA
April 3: Guinean armed forces
have seized power to end what they
have described as "bloody and
ruthless dictatorship". The
military has dissolved the ruling
democratic party, parliament , and
have suspended the constitution.
They have imposed a curfew ,
closed the airport, and the countries borders. A spokesman said
that the takeover took place
"without bloodshed, in complete
calm and amid popular rejoicing.''

WASHINGTON, D.C.
April 4: President Reagan has
urged a worldwide ban on chemical
arms, declaring that chemical
weapons had "serious implications
for our own security." The
president announced that Vice
President Bush would submit a
draft of a proposed treaty in
Geneva to ban the production,
possession, and use of chemical
weapons worldwide. Mr. Reagan
added that the United States must
have a "limited retaliatory
capability of its own" of chemical
weapons to deter the "massice arsenal" compiled by the Soviet
Union.

NEW DELHI, INDIA
April 3: Assassins killed a member
of parliament in the Panjabi

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International News Briefs
" STEPHEN M. KASSAB

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sign up at the Info, desk!
F.rst Come Bas !

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Music and Theater Unite for Operas
DAWN GREENE
Staff Writer
Every spring semester the Music
and Theater Departments

traditionaly present a show to the
university. The departments annually alternate the selection of the
show performed . This year the

Music Department chose "Dido
and Aeneas" by Henry Purcell and
"The Little Mahogbnny " by Kurt
Weil and Berthold Brecht.
The cast was selected by William
Decker, a BU music professor, and
Gerald "Buddy " Teigelo, New
York director, choreographer, dancer and producer, who will be
producing the works with Decker.
"Things are just starting to get
off the ground now. With the casts
that we have for the two operas, I
know they will be wonderful performances," said Decker.
"It's such an experience to be
working with Teigelo. He has
superb credentials in coachjpg and
teaching and it is a great opportunity for me to learn from him.
Prof. Decker is working hard to
make sure that we enjoy what
we're doing as well as making it
look professional," said LaVon
Wills who will portray Belinda, one
of the main characters in "Dido
and Aeneas".
Other cast members include
Laurie Perry as Dido and Brian
Thomas as Aeneas. The chorus
consists of four sailors; Lee
Scheider , Kerry Boll , Brian
Karabin and Bob Eineigle, and a
band of witches; Margaret Mullert,
Susan Matinko, Anita McCoy ,

Karla Morris, Laurie Jo Klahr,
Jennifer English, Michelle Myers
and Emily Awkerman.
The cast list for "The Little
Mahogonny" includes Karen Lombard! as Jessie, Joanie Landers as
Bessie, Kerry Boll as Charlie, Bob
Koch as Billy, Duane Long as Bobby and John Kisberg as Jimmy.
John Garcia will be the piano accompianist during rehearsals for
"Dido and Aeneas" and will also be
playing the harpsicord during the
performances. Julie Pyle will be
stage manager for the two shows.
William O'Donnell of the Theater
Department will be designing the
stage and costumes for the operas.
Assisting O'Donnell are the Bloomsburg Players and students from
Stage Lighting Design classes and
Theater Appreciation classes.
We're really interested in putting
on a quality piece of work. The
Theater Department works well
with the Music Department and
everyone is really excited about the
production," said O'Donnell. "I
also like working with Buddy/ I've
toured with opera companies and it
is refreshing to work with a
professional who is still in the
business."
The performances will be April
13 and 14, 8 p.m., Carver Hall.

fatter "

God Is a Woman And Damned MeTo Bloomsurg

KATHLEEN BARTUNEK
Staff Writer
Many people ask me why I came
to Bloomsburg. Usually I avoid answering the question, but I believe
the'time has come for me to expose
the real reason I am here, as it may
explain why many other students
and faculty are present at this particular institution. Very simply put,
I'm here because I died two years
ago and was assigned to this place
as punishment.
I passed on at the Christmas party in 1981. Mom and Dad were
basking in the Bermuda sun, so like
any other normal teenager I
decided to have a party in their absence. My friends came over and
we proceeded to drown ourselves in
holiday cheer. I guess I drank too
much, because when they passed
out, I died. After consuming nearly
a gallon of "Purple Jesus Punch",
it was hardly surprizing that I was
in a very good mood when I got to
Heaven.
Before continuing, I feel it's my
duty to inform the general public as
to what Heaven is really like.
Forget Dante, he was all wrong.
Oh, he was right about it being very
bright and full of spirits, but wrong
in that Heaven is terribly unstructured. Without sounding too
irreverent, I'd even venture to call

Heaven a very loose place. There
were ho divisions, people just
floated around hanging out. They
all looked a little high. Heaven was
also a very friendly place *- people
smiled and waved as I glided on by
on my way to see God.
Anyhow , God chuckled as I landed, rather abruptly, in the Hall of
Audience. I was having trouble
standing, I guess I was unaccustomed to the lessened gravity
up there. God was sitting behind an
alter that resembled a piece of
modern office furniture. It was
white and cluttered with papers. I
don't recall what God was wearing.
God was very understanding and
waited for me to regain my composure.
"Comfy Kath? "
'/Yes Ma 'am. Excuse me
Ma'am, am I addressing You
properly?"
"Indeed. However, since you've
called Me 'God' throughout your
miserably sinful life, why stop
now?"
I wasn t too crazy about God's
choice of adjectives. God turned
her attention to the papers on her
desk, and I grew increasingly uncomfortable as she continued to
shake her head 'tisk-tiskirig'.
"Listen Kath, I've got 2,000 souls
waiting to see Moi, so I'll be brief .

Hacky Sack Gains Poriarity With Students

Gerald "Buddy" Teigello, a New York director, choreographer,, dancer and producer will collaborate with
William Decker to produce 'Dido and Aeneas' and The Little' Mahogonny.'

JOSEPH ALLISON
Voice Contributor
A young man came to the park in
shorts, shoes, and a shirt. In a flash
there was a flailing of arms and
legs. What on earth was he doing?
Maybe he was dancing? Maybe he
was ill? Actually, he was playing
with a Hacky Sack.
For David Wightman, this type oi
behavior has become quite natural .
It is not just the flailing of arms and
legs that keeps him involved. He is
simply doing his best to keep a
small golf ball-sized bag of beans
from touching the ground. The
small leather bag is called a 'foot
bag', and . its subsequent and
related behavior is the sport of
"Hacky Sack."
According "to Wightman, "The
objective in Hacky is to keep the little bag ( two inches in diameter and
32 grams in weight) in the air by
\ letting it . hit the inside and outside
of your foot. The degree of concentration that is developed while
doing this is incredible." Apparently, an individual's eye-foot
coordination is not as keen as that
of the eye-hand relationship.
Unless you 've had previous exJ perience with soccer, your un-

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derstanding of this type of coordination will be limited. "Still ,
Wightman insists, "Hacky Sack is
a coordination sport that requires
no previous coordination or understanding. "
The history of the concept of
"Hacky Sack" goes back to 1976
when a physical therapist was
seeking a new, more effective
treatment for knee-injured patients. By introducing the muscles
surrounding the knee to varying
degrees of flexion and extension ,
rehabilitation would take place
more quickly. Manipulation of the
foot bag by the feet incorporated
specialized kicks which, affect different muscle groups.
The specialized type of kicks include the inside , outside, and back
kick. The easiest , the inside kick, is
performed by bringing the instep of
either foot to a knee-high perpendicular position adjacent to the
other leg. The foot bag is then
allowed to hit the instep and the
process continues for as long as
possible. The outside kick is simply
allowing the bag to hit the outside
of the foot, away from the rest of
the body. The back kick is an alternate form of the outside kick. The

)nly difference is that the foot
naking contact is found, believe it
)r not, behind the player's scapula ,
rhis certainly makes for an ineresting if not acrobatic endeavor.
Because of the awkwardness in
)laying Hacky Sack, many types of
ndividuals find it unusually
ascinating. Wightman explains,
'All kinds of people are playing
iacky. In this type of sport its easy
or Joe Schmoe to become well
mown simply by developing a style
>r kick of his or her own.''
When asked for tips in preparing
yourself for the beginning of a life
vith the toot bag, Wightman asser;ed , "It involves you mentally as
veil as physically and one of the
ong-standing laws of the sport is
hat there is no such thing as beginner's-luck. Everyone, no matter
low coordinated they think they
ire, will inevitably screw it up.
Once the'pre-Hacky warm ups
tave been, squared away, the inlividual is ready to try his or her
:oot at the specialized kicks. Kicks
ire riot to be confused with 72-yard
'ield goal tries. Kicking is meant to
>e a bunt or bump off the shoe so
he novice doesn't spend the entire
ifterribon chasing the bag" around

the yard. The initial concept to
grasp is that of control. A
reasonable amound of control can
be gained by bumping the bag from
one foot to the other and practicing
until it becomes almost inborn or
until you tire of chasing the foot
bag.
The ultimate sign of development
is apparent when the player can
keep the bag off the ground for at
least six kicks. The individual has
now graduated into the higher
ranks of "Hacky Circles." These
are small groups of successful solo
- Hacky enthusiasts who feel
they're ready to strutt their stuff.
The foot bag is passed to anyone in
the circle and they -can dazzle the
others by keeping it up for a while
or immediately elect to pass it to
someone else.
"A lot of people like, to parallel
Hacky Sack with the frisbee craze,
but I think the foot bag has many
more aspects. You can't take a
frisbee and throw it to yourself...very easily. I mean it's just
not a whole lot of fun." Wightman
continued, "Hacky Sack, on the
other hand, is an excellent solosport that you can enjoy for hours
upon end."

It's hke this, I'm really sorry, but
^
you've failed.
I'm afraid I'm going
to have to damn you."
"I'm only seventeen God, how
bad could I have been?''
God shuffled through some
papers. "Let's see, on a scale of one
to ten you rate a three and a half .
Sorry, you missed the curve."
"What's the curve?"
"Four and a half ."
"You mean I'm going to Hell for
a lousey point? What about
purgatory, can't I make it up
there?"
"I cancelled purgatory in the
eighteenth century."
"Yeah but I believe in it in the
twentieth century. Doesn't faith
count for anything? "
"I don't have time to get into
that. I'll tell you what, I don't do
this for everybody, but I like you so
I'm going to give you a make-up."
"Oh thank God."
"You're welcome. However
there are certain conditions for
this. It wouldn't be fair to me to
make it easy on you, so I've picked
a nice place for you to repent.''
"Where?"
"I'm going to send you to a
sleepy little town in Pennsylvania
called Bloomsburg."
"God, wow, I've been to Bloomsburg. It's nowhere. Couldn't I
repent in Malibu?"
"That would be counterproductive. The whole point is to
keep you out of trouble. Bloomsburg is perfect - no nightlife,
therefore no temptation.''

''How long would I have to stay in
Bloomsburg?"
"Four years."
"Tell You what, give me six
years in Siberia and we'll call it
even."
"No dice. It's Bloomsburg or
Hell.!'
"Hell's for eternity, right?"
"Yep."
"Isn't there anywhere else?"
"Well, I'd be willing to send you
to Slippery Rock."
"No, no! NOT SLIPPERY
ROCK !I'll take Bloomsburg."
"You're sure?"
"Positive."
"Okay. See you when you die,
and get that Divine cum up!"
"Yes God, thank you Ma 'am, in
Bloomsburg how can I miss?"

Conference

(Continued from Page 1)
visiting professorships at nine
colleges and universities across the
country and participated in 11
research and grant projects. He is
currently president of the Arizona
State Reading Council.
His publication list is extensive,
including over 20 articles and 11
books which he has written, coauthored, edited , or was a consultant. Dr.Searfoss is also responsible for the development of five
new reading courses offered at
Arizona State and has been a part
of numerous conferences on international, national, regional and
state levels.

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Campus Shorts
The Clash

For Secretaries

The only area appearance of the
ane health, followed by a question
rock
group, The Clash, will be at
.
and answer period.
University in Nelson
Bloomsburg
Dr. William Sproule, a member
Sunday, April 15, 8
Fieldhouse,
of the department of health,
physical education and athletics at p.m. The performance is sponsored
Bloomsburg University, will end by the university's Student Concert
the program with some good Committee.
relaxation therapy...flexibility ,
In addition to the university,
cardiovascular fitness , and
recreational activities.
This special day, "Professional
Secretaries Day, " away from the
The Women's Center's volunteer
office environment should lead to
good interaction and discussion, training has been rescheduled, and
according to chairperson Joan will be held Saturday, April 14, 9
a.m. to 3 p.m., and the following
Walton.
three Tuesdays, April 17, 24, and
Interested persons may contact
May
1, 7 to 10:30 p.m. The training
Joan Walton at 389-4422 for more
is
open
to all area women who have
details about the retreat. Deadline
registered
and participated in the
for registration is April 20. Limited
Center's
screening
procedures.
number of seats available. The cost
Volunteers
are
an
integral part of
of $10.95 includes luncheon.
the Women's Center's program,
performing many differen functions. Among the responsibilities
volunteers undertake after
The Campus Judicial Board
training, are staffing the center's
hot
line, accompanying women to
looking for new members for the
community services, staffing the
84-85 school year. If you feel you
Berwick office, assisting with child
care at the shelter, providing tranwould like to be a member
sportation, facilitating support'
please call Richard Haupt
groups, assisting with the public in^
located in the Residence Lif eJ^^fcM
formation program, and par-

Bloomsburg University is sponsoring a Symposium-Retrea t on
Wed., April 25, at the Sheraton Inn ,
Danville for secretaries and office
professionals.
The all-day program will consist
of a morning workshop on communication by Dr. Mary K.
Badami, a faculty member in the
Department of Communication
Studies at Bloomsburg University.
Her topics will include:
organizational communication , interpersonal communication , assertive behavior situations , followed
by a question and answer period.
Dr. Ira Gensemer, an associate
in Geisinger Medical Center 's
Department of Neurology, will
speak in the afternoon session on
bio-feedback...control over pain ,
repressed emotions and attitude

<$%

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Women 's Center

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Office for derails.

The number to call
is 389-4091

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NEW BUS SERVICE

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between Bloomsburg University
¦ ¦ ¦ ¦
AND
i
| Penn State, Lehighton, Allentown & Bethlehem

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* Days Before Holidays Will Follow FR1. Schedule.
• Great Service & Reasonable Rates
Designed with the Student In Mind!
•

For further Info , call or stop in at:

,

CARTERS CUT RATE
•
784-8689

(Service by TransBridge Lines of Bethlehem)

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ticipating in planning and staffing
fund-raising events. These responsibilities provide volunteers with
an opportunity to use many different skills they might possess,
and to develope new ones.
The training - includes an extensive examination of the causes
and effects of violence against
women, familiarization with community resources available to victims of violence, development of
skills in "active" listening, and
discussion of the philosophy of the
battered women's movement and
the Women's Center.
Women who wish to participate
in the volunteer training course
may call Florence Thompson,
Outreach Coordinator at the cen"
•
ter, 784-6631.

National Briefs

Ford 's Road
Former President Gerald R.
Ford has agreed to make 40 to 45
appearances to aid Republican
candidates across the nation but
has struck on a price - tag of
$200,000, to be paid by the
Republican National Committee.
Ford won't see any of the money
though. Half will go to support activities of the Ford museum and the
Ford library . The other half will go
to Betty Fordrs alcohol and drug
rehabilitation center in Rancho
Mirage, CA.

Jesse's Mix-up
|
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j •> '.

tickets (all general admission) are
on sale in the Bloomsburg.area at
Record and Jeanswear, Pro Audio,
as well as Susquehanna and
Bucknell Universities.
In the Scranton, Wilkes-Barre
area, tickets can be purchased at
Joe Nardone's in the Wyoming
Valley Mall and at Ralph's Record
City in downtown Scranton.
^

One of the most covered Up and
possibly most politically dangerous
remarks of this presidential campaign did not come from a candidate, but rather from one of his
friends. Black Muslim leader Louis
Farrakhn said to Jewish critics, "If
yx^hjymjfas^bj^^

Jesse Jackson) , ni the name of
Allah, this will be the last (harm)
you do." While Jackson was trying
to clear up Farrakhan's statement,
the leader of America's other principal Black Muslim faction, Warith
Deen Mahammad said, "I would
suspect the both of them of being
liars and hypocrites."

Scout 's Woe

Since 1936, Girl Scouts have been
supplying the nation with cookies
annually butthis year has brought
unfortunate tampering, incidents.
As of last weekend; there were 81
reports of pips , needles; paper clips^"
and ground glass found in boxes in
17 states from Maine to Nebraska.
Some objects seemed to hsiye been
baked into the cookies, while others
had been poked ^through sealed
boxes. Hospitals around the country offered to x-ray the cookies free
and Scout leaders and other
authorities stopped distribution in
severalare1as;»:; T--:^

Moundball Hits BU

Ga^rranq ^fefe vR^turyt

Huskies Romp Over LH

(Continued ffbmjPa ge 8)
close. However, MU will fee without
two time conference runnerup at
number one, Miles Gray, who is out
for the year after suffering
multiple fractures of his leg in an
auto accident.
NOTES : Due to the unseasonable
weather several matches were
postponed a listing of the
reschedulings is as follows: Shippensburg (April 14 at 12:00) and
Scranton (tentatively for April 27).
The Cornell match will not be
rescheduled.
BU 9, Lock Haven 0.
MITCHELL d. Krise 6-1, 6-0
CASARI d. Savage 6-1, 6-1
LARIO d. Lentz 6-0, 6-2
PENNEY d. Green 6-0, 6-0
GREBE d. Bellman 6-1, 6-1
GIBBS d. Kemmerer 6-0, 6-0
MITCHELL-GIBBS d. Lentz-

Green6-1, 6-1
CASARI-GREBE d. KriseSavage 6-l, 6-i
d.
L A R I O - A U GU S T I N E
6-0,
6-0
Bellman-Mishra

MIDDLE STATES
TENNIS ASSOCIATION
CURRENT RANKINGS
SPRING 1984
1. Princeton
2. Penn
3. West Virginia
4. Penn State
5. Swarthmore
6. Mercyhurst
7. BLOOMSBURG
8. Millersville
9. West chester
. 10. Haverfort.
Honorable Mention: Temple,
Lafayette, Lehigh

Sailing Courses Offered

A course in Basic Sailing will be
offered at Bloomsburg University
at 7 p.m. on four consecutive Wednesday evenings beginning April
18th.
The course is intended for those
with little or ho knowledge of
sailing.

Discussions in this classroom setting will include information on
sailboat etiquett , manuverings under normal and rough weather conditions, basic seamanship, boating
safety, and other topics of interest
to the students.
The course, taught by Dr. Bill
Sproule, is intended for those interested in gaining a working
knowledge of sailing. Dr. Sproule is
Assistant Chair of Physical
Education, and has taught Sailing
for both Bloomsburg University
and The U. S. Coast Guard
Auxiliary for a number of years.
Further information concerning
this and other late starting courses
can be obtained by contacting the
Bloomsburg University Office of
Extended Programs at 389-4004.

take a closer look at..

AFMTTVIENTS

$200 A MONTH/SUMMER
Furnished withallutiliUes paid

(Continued from Page 8)
softball coach Lanhette "Crunch" Crutchinsdn spurred her actions,
It seems that after a disagreement over Cartwright's daughter playing
ability (she was cut prior to the first practice), Cartwright went into a
blind rage when she returned to her job site: And instead of digging trenches to alleviate the flow of sewage from Hartline to the Commons (just
kidding Servomation) , she "miscalculated" the direction and headed
towards the softball field. Her rage knew no bounds as, she dug six foot
deep trenches across the diamond not to mention to the huge four foot
mounds of dirt left in strategic, locations.
Doubleday,'s contribution was in the area of rules, where she designed a
set of simplistic yet demanding guidelines. The rules basically followed
those outlined for the game of softball with a few key differences. First, a
team gets points for remaining out on the field and more importantly
staying atop the five mounds, from which they battle against the enemy
with grenades, bazookas and the like. If a team can stay the course for
more than three batters in a row it gains another five grenades. After it
accumulates twenty such trinkets it can trade them in on a set of
bazookas.
The sport is currently being tested exclusively at Bloomsburg during
the 1984 spring campaign. Crutchison, who is reportedly fully recovered
from her drug induced state caused by the disbanding of her softball
team, is rumored to be training her ex-players in a top secret location in
the fine art of guerilla warfare.
NOTES : All games will be home as BU houses the lone mound ball field
in the state; thus substantiating Bloomsburg claim as the Pooperston of
moundball.

Attention All Students

Anyone interested in serving on the Search and Screen Committee for
finding the new university president please attend tonight's CGA meeting
at 6:30 p.m. in Multi-A. Must be dedicated and able to attend summer
meetings. Any further questions may be addressed to the CGA office at
4467.
.

Classified Ads
ANNOUNCEMENTS

RETREAT! RETREAT! - Inter-Varsity Christian Fellowship, April 13, 14, 15, Planned Famine!
NEED CASH? Earn $500 plus each school year, 2-4 (flexible) hours per week placing and filling posters
on campus. Serious workers only; we give recommendations. Call now for summer & next fall.
1-800-243-6679.
HEALTH YOURSELF:..at the NSA Health Fair, April 11th from 11 -2 p.m. in Multi-Room B. Information on
diet, fitness, stress. Free blood pressure readings, hematocrit screening, and much more!
HOUSE AVAILABLE...for the Summer of '84, and the Fall & Spring of '85. Houses 8--2V4 blocks from
campus. Contact Jim Ulshafer at 784-2871 (after 5:30 p.m.) for more info.
Typing and Resume Service, 672-9324.
FOUND: Boots, call Mike at 784-6174.

PERSONALS

Fran G.- When we act stupid, childish and immature - we're actually imitating you! Burn that Ski-Club
jacket ! From your Luzerne 'friends'.
Bodega Scott: Thanks for heating up our lives - The Girls at 355 Lightstreet.
Matt- Best of luck in Baseball this season - L.C.
Congratulations new sisters of Alpha Sigma Alpha! Love ya- Mare.
Hi Mare-Nice new jacket- we miss you.
O.K. you G.F. guys she has paid her debt.
Don't worry Elizabeth I still love you!!
...
Sunshine- Happy Birthday. Love ya. Boo

i VOICE
I
I CLASSIFIEDS

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Send to: Box 97 KUB or drop in the Voice mail slot, Union before 5 p.m. on Sunday
]
or before 5 p.m. on Tuesday.
. .• _ All classified must be pre-paid.
|

j"~
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¦
' .. . .! wish to place a classified ad under j
the heading:
,
Announcements
. 1
¦——-—— :
Lost and Found
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For Sale
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Wanted
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0;\: . ; , ¦
Other ¦" - . ¦
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. I enclose $__
..

W V/IV ^C VI

WlV I O....

P.7-SailingCourses

Raise Record to 4-5

Netmen Overwhelm Lock Haven Enroute to 9-0 Win

Bob Yoder

Scott Grebe, seen here in fall action, has been preparing for today's 3:00 meet with Millersville despite
the recent bad weather and cancellations.

Satire;

Moundball: The Latest in Sports

The latest in women's sports? Pumping iron? Ickey pooh, with the
steriods and sweat, too repulsive. How about aerobicize? No way, those
body suits are too revealing for the slightly overweight. Swimnastics
maybe? Get 80's man, females nowadays want to exercise their mind as
well as their body. Then what about Trivial Pursuit? How guache!
Women want to stimulate their minds not dilute it.
Moundball is the name of the game for 1984, (Jane Fonda eat your heart
out). It is a sort of guerilla warfare baseball type of game that combines
the best of the Irish Republican Army and America's Favorite Pasttime.
A sport that demands a quick thinking , intuitive mind and lithe, athletic
body.
The game's origins*are still not properly documented but historians
have generally agreed that two people played major roles in its development. Alexandra Cartwright, formerly an excavation worker at Bloomsburg University, and Alvernia Doubleday, Vice President of Foreign Affairs at the same institution.
Cartwright is credited with designing the playing surface, which
resulted quite by accident according to Cartwright, despite rumors to the
contrary by insiders. According to those insiders, her .recent tiff with BU
(Continued oh Page 7)

WADE DOUGLAS
Sports Editor
In their first match in thirteen
days, the Husky netmen (4-5 ) overwhelmed a Lock Haven team that
was even less experienced then
themselves, not to mention considerably less talented BU waltzed
to straight set wins in all nine matches, surrending just eleven total
fames, in chalking up their second
shutout of the weather plagued
season. The Bald Eagles fell to 0-1.
Despite the case of victory,
Coach Burt Reese expressed both
his satisfaction and uncertainty,
"We got a good effort in all the
singles matches but we lacked
some intensity in the doubles...I'm
not real sure how good we are yet,
but after Temple (Saturday 's match) we'll have a better idea. They
gave West Virginia a tougher match than, we did. " (BU lost 7-2 to
WVU).
The match marked the return of
Mike Casari and Scott Gibbs to the
starting six after both were stalled
with leg injuries. Casari , though
noticeably favoring his still bothersome knee, was still more than
LH's Mark Savage could handle.The BU freshman's 6-1, 6-1
triumph was fourth straight
without a loss.
Gibbs showed no ill effects from
his pulled groin with one of two
Husky shutouts wins. The lefthander who switched to a down- sized racquet, was victorious at
number six over Chad Kemmerer ,
pushing his season mark to 4-4.
Other singles winners for the

visiting Huskies were Tim Mitchell
(3-6) who finally got a breather after a series of matches against top
players, Rob Lario claimed his
fourth win against five defeats,
while Mike Penney and Scott Grebe
took home wins for the third time in
four matches in the fourth and fifth
slots.
The doubles competition again
proved to be ah experimentation
ground for Reese, who said the
juggling will continue until the
Millersville match this afternoon.
The combinations for the LH contest saw Mitchell and Gibbs
teamed up at the top spot where a 61, 6-1 win resulted. Casari-Grebe
saw duty at the second slot where a
similar victory occurred. The one
duo that has remained constant for
most of the season has been Lario
and freshman Steve Augustine, at
the number three position.
One
y that should see considerable doubles duty is Jere Bird.
Bird, who didn't play at LocJk
Haven , teamed up with Lario
earlier in the year to form a successful twosome, has also played
several recent matches with Mitchell where Bird continued to play
well.
Today's match at Millersville is a
showdown between the seventh and
eighth ranked teams according to
the most recent Middle States Tennis Association listing. Prior to the
season, Reese expected both the
Marauders and West Chester to
challenge them in the conference
race so the match is expected to be
(Continued on Page 7)

Linda Becker, looks very intent in a practice session kshe warms up for a meet during fall action. Linda
playing in the number three spot, will be in action today at 3:30 p.m. against Lafayette. v -^
• iy