Boa rd Prepa res Guide To Hel p Teachers Deal With Racial Slurs The board of Education has prepared a guide that tells teachers how to reply when their pupils use szich derisive racial terms as "whitey " or suggest that Italians are gangsters and Jews seek special treatment. The guide, made public by the Bureau of Curricular Development, said, for example, that when a Negro uses the w6rd "whitey" a good response would be: "Did you ever see pictures of southern mobs when civil rights workers go by? What do their faces show? Aren 't you showin g the same thing? " The answer to a pupil' s saying "Puerto Ricans cause slums" might be: "We had city slums long before Puerto Ricans arrived. Slums are the result of year s of neglect and failure by the City government and the general public in urban planning. " If a pupil says: "My father says that when he was in the Arm y all the Jewish soldiers had soft jobs away from the fighting," the reply would be: "How does the Arm y assign men into combat units? Do you believe assignments are made on the basis of religious background s?" If another asks: "Wh y are Italians gangsters?" the response might be "Crimes are committed by people of various backgrounds . They are not related to any particular group. Television progr ams such as "The Untouchables," lead to false generalizations about crime and nati onalit y." Why Negroes Riot In answer to why Negroes riot , y_ the suggested reply is: "People riot ""when they feel there is no other way to obtain what they believe to y 7 be their legitimate rights." When a Negro child resents the use of the word "Negroes" and insists on "black people" the guide's suggested response is: "I can understand your feelings about the word "Negro." It originated as a racial classification of Africans during the period of slavery. However, the term "black people" is also objectionable to many people. Perhaps the most precise and correct term is "Afro-American or African-American." When a white child states: "Everybody should have his rights but why can't they take it easy. You can't change things overnight," the response indicated is "Would you say that 300 years is overnight? How long should people wuit for their civil rights?" When a pupil says: "Everybody knows that the Irish drink too muc h ," the answer could be: "Who is everybody? Excessive drinking is found among many groups. Alcoholism is recognized as a social disease of our times and alcoholics require treatment to help them overcome the need for drinking." A Vietnam Paralleled If a pupil says: "Japanese people are sneaky," the response might be "The United States Army Attacks the Viet Cong and North Vietnamese forces in South Vietnam without warning. Does that moan Americans are sneaky? All Japonose did not agree with military leaders of Japan who carried out the air attacks on Hawaii and othor United States bases in the Pacific." In dealing with obscene language the guide notes: "Habitual profanity li often not directed at tho teacher or fellow student. A boy ¦ays, "Mr -, I lost my book." The suggested reply: "Tho word you used to describe the book doesn 't tell me which book you lost. It is also not the kind of language we use in class." Among possible approaches suggested is "Recreate a classroom situation in which there was a verbal exchange between two pupils who used obscene language. Tape the exchange and play it back. " "Ask pupils to record profane and obscene words they hear or read and indicate the circumstances under which they were used ," was another suggestion. "Select excerpts from Shakespeare 's works which contain profane or obscene expressions ," the guide advised. "Explain Shakespeare 's reason for using these exp ressions. " The guide also includes the American Indian , t h e Ch inese, the Poles, and the Swedes with information on their contributions to American culture. Dr. Bernard E. Donovan , Superintend ent of Schools , said the guide , "is a direct approach to the problem of interpreting the culture and contributions of all minority group s which have in the past made this nation great and which Off -Campus Women Hold Pizza Part y The Freshmen women's off-campus council held a "Pizza party " in The Maroon and Gold Concert Band, pictured above, is one of the the West Hall Loun ge on Tuesda y, April 29, 1969 from 8:00 p.m . to three groups to entertain in the Combined Pops Concert , May 11. 10:00 p.m. The theme was Hobo Night , and the entertainme nt was provided by several of the off-campus women, residents. Celestine Wrona , Housenick House; Kathleen Simpson, Yodock House ; and Celeste Fobia , Davis House , each sang The Harmonettes , Men 's Glee ranged by Wilson and Ehret , and solos; the Hassert Hazzards sang a Club , and the Maroon and Gold Side by Side by Woods. series of rounds and Martin House Concert Band , three performing enThe Men 's Glee Club repertoire did an original skit, which related sembles from the BSC Music De- will include the Navy Hymn, Der several amusin g incidents they 've partment , will prese nt a combined Entfernten by Schubert , and Hunthad durin g the year. Kathlee n concert of varied " pop " music on er's arrangement of The Streets of Simpson won the $5 prize for in- ' Sunday, M ay 11, at 8:00 p.m. in Laredo. The Glee Club will join dividual entertainment , and the Haas Auditorium. with the Harmonettes in singing Hassert Hazzards won the $5 group The complete presentation , di- selections from George Gershwin 's entertainment prize. rected by respective members of Porgy and Bess. Soloists will be Dean Tolan , Mrs. Kinne y, Mrs. the Music Department faculty, w ill David Drucker , William Bird , and Locke, and Ann Carpenter were include the Harmonettes under the James Hatton. guests at the part y. Mart y Manzick , dire ction of Miss Sylvia Cronin; the The Maroon and Gold Concert presid ent of this year 's Freshman Men's Glee Club , under the direcCouncil presented Mrs. Williams tion of Mr . William Decker who is Band will present highlights from with a gift of appreciation. acting chairman of the Music De- Lerne r and Lowe's Camelot , Yopar tment; , and the Maroon and der 's Relax!, Slaughter On Tenth are now strivin g to make it even Gold Concert Band , directed by Mr. Avenue by Rodgers , and Bilik's arrangement of the American Civil greater. It should be a valuable Stephe n Wallace. Wa r Fantasy. tool for every secondar y school The Harmonettes will present teacher. " Bartok' s Enchanting Song and the The public is cordially invited to Loafer , Schuman 's Holiday Song, attend this program. There will be While We're Young which was ar- no admission charge. Contemporary Mus ic Hi^hli^hts Comb ined Pops Concert Revolution & Reforms A News Essay On the mats—Allen Maurer, M&G, and BUI Sanders, Gadfly— flyweights. Education by Allan Maurer Aviation Education News Bulletin—Growth of aviation education at all levels has been described as "fantastic" by Cessna Aircraft Company since introduction of the company's Air Age Education programs two years ago. Officials stated that a 000% increase in high school activity and a 400% increase at the college level has been measured by the company since instituting Its Air Age Education programs. When the company first .surveyed aviation education courses being taught in the nation's sch ools in late 1068, there were only 66 high schools offering aviation courses for credit. By January, 1968, the number had jumped to 401. Before Cessna's Junior college program was announced, there were 21 colleges offering programs in aviation. Today, the company has Identified 88 community college level courses or ser ies of courses ranging up to completo aviation programs. Tho AENB also reports that aviation education is progressing in maj or universities across the countryFurt h er , new chapter of Alpha Eta Rho, the International professional aviation fraternity, have formed at Kent State (Ohio), Lewis College (Illinois), St. Peters- The polls will once again be opened fhe twelfth of May to finish some unfinished business. Since only seven votes were cast to approve the changes to the constitution , approximately 400 more are needed to make the constituted quorum. Therefore the poll s will be reopened Monday, May 12 and ev ery successive day un til the quorum is reached. If you haven ' t cast your vote , please do the twelfth by showing yo ur BSC I.D, to the person at the polls outside of Husky Lounge. If you are not sure whether you vot ed , display your card and your name can be checked for pr evious voting. The cooperation of the student body to vote as rapidl y as possible on the twelfth or soon thereafter will end this unfinished business nicely. burg (Florida), and Cochiso Collego (Arizona). The Fratornlty now has active chapters on 25 campuses. Many colleges, junior 'colleges, and universities venture into aviation education by way of flying clubs, which ofFor theory and training with qualified Instructors, and often , at Inexpensive rates. BSC's Flying Club Is still in the Infant stago, but its constitution has been approved by the CGA, It has a core group of members, and It' s looking for people who wont to FLY (In an airplane), By Brian McLernan Last Thursday night , as occasionally happe ns, in my sometimes dubious wanderin g, I was sitting in the Maroon and Gold office trying to wri te. This is often as difficult an assignment as sitting in the John , trying to read the Reader 's Digest. Thursday night was one of those nights, for outside in the hall , BSC' s new left were holding a rally. - Yes, our lovely radical s, who answered an M&G ad for prospective members to an SDS-like organization , were holding a meeting. The meeting was under the jurisdiction of BSC's very own Eldrige Cleaver , a so-called intellectual , graduate student . Thin gs were well organized . Our leader showed up 35 minutes late, There was a good turn-out , perhaps 30 students , which is equal to somewhere in the neighborhood of .6% of the Bloomsburg student body—a representative group. Debate was long and violent concerning the name of the organization which would represent BSC's brave , modern loft. They were afraid to have themselves referred to as SDS because they felt tha t the Bloomsburg student body would not openly suppor t an SDS chapter , so they adopted (for the time being at least) the name SCRU. That' s students for something or other . Now, many of the students in attendance felt that SCRU involved a concept entirel y too liberal to bo connected with BSC' s new left , so further debate regarding the name of the organization was tabled pending a later mooting. As Is the case with all "radical" organizatio ns SCRU then turned its att ention toward action. After all , what good is a radical left wi t hout somethin g to protest. Everyone In attendance had their particular boots, but no one could exactly pin* w point what was bugging him. So, for the next forty-five minutes or so, the vast membership tried to select a cause against which to demonstr ate. "Well , how about women's hours ?" said one girl who looked as if she had no real reason to be concerned . "No , we can't talk about that , there isn 't justification for widespread support" "How about booze on campus?" said a pimply 18 year old. "No , the state owns the campus, I suppose they can say what happens on their land. " "Well — how about studen ts ' rights?" "You 've got it. We'll protest about students ' rights. How do we go about prote sting?" "We 'll organize a demonstration. " "Where?" "I don't know." "Well when shall we have it? " "First weekend there isn't something going on." General assent , "But who's gonna lead it?" "That is a problem—we need a loader. " "Where can we find one?" "Well , the samo place the CGA finds theirs. " "Oh. " At 0:45 the mooting adjourn ed after rol l was taken and another mooting scheduled. And so, the students of BSC join Harvar d, Columbia, Corne ll, and other Important colloges in carefully planned , well organized and sufllclently understood protest of major Inj ustices. ' God bless you , children , you might make WDAU. Editor 's Note : The prec eding article is a biased opinion . It does conta in facts , however , and so it Is bein g prin ted on a news page. LETTERS... son, Kelh Elliott , Judy Mills , Sharon' Dow, Sally Wlllemet , Joyce Berlanda, Cl aire Mc Neils, Barbara Twisted Stan to get some correct information , Myers , Barbara R it sko, Cindy EverDear Editor: instead of attacking them in an un- , ett , Karen Klemash , Renee Zim* Twisted From Stan in the April ' merman signed letter. Gadfly Return 30 edition of th e M&G is so inane Furthermore did the thought t ha t it doesn't merit a reply. But arise that a lot of sisters would Dear Editor , ' Stan 's distortion of the facts do de- have gotten hurt by sorority housmand a re ply. Well , the Gadfly is with us again. ing? What about roommates of two 1. Stan t alks about the wa y t he different sororities and their dilemAt least is is no longer an amateur"leaders " vote and ra ises the ques- ma? What about th e sisters who ish scandal sheet. Now it's a civtion of if they represent "us." I would have had to give up their ilized "paper " featuring somewhat have a question for Stan. Does he prese nt rooms to move into a wing inflammatory "editorials. " represent the resident men (ask I' m re ferring, of course, to the in a dorm not of their own choosthe resident men) or does he reparticle "The Student as Nigger" ing? These girls were told that the resent the administratio n? by "profess or " Jerry Farbe r. independents were giving a little 2. Stan also talks abou t the diffiGranted , the average student does so the sister would have to give a culty of getting a quorum. If my little too. In other words , the sorordeliberately place himself in a pomemory is correc t, at the April 21 ity would be abl e to live together sition of inferiority, but a permeeting of Council , Tony Savage son must have a knowledgeable but ^he sisters had to give up the had to go and drag Stan from his "consolation prize " of choosing "guid e" lead him through the forroom at 7:10 in orda r to reach a where they wanted to live. Who est called "Education. " I don 't •qu orum . mean the kook who screams "Freeare the real martyrs , if anyone? 3. In regards to the excellent Still , the sororities voted for sor- dom , now!" while denying others propo sals of Chuck Blankenship . ority housing because they realized free speech and the freedom of The proposals were from the entire getting an education without pothat the important thing was not Constitutional Revisions Commit- that they were giving up their lice and Nationa l Guardsmen havte. In fact , Chuck was not a mem- good view of North Hall to live ing to break up every "bull sesber of the Committee until second sion" having more than four peoperh aps in West , but that they semester. And when the proposals ple. I mean a person who has taken would be living together—not matwere presented to Council (by tering where—expressing the sis- th e time to rationally and responGeorge Calvert , Chuck had very lit- terhood they all had pledged. sibly make it his business to open tle to say abou t them. In fact, he new areas of understanding and acHowever , as we all know , sorormoved to table the long range proity housing was not passed , due to tion. This type leader does exist : posals which were the most imporHarvard isn 't considered so liberal much static from independents. tant of the committee 's recommenbecause no change has taken place , The solution proposed in the letter dations. obviously . You don 't hear about to which we reply was alre ady 4. As for Marcia Williams ' althought of by sorority sisters. They „ the person who cuts through red leged incompetence. For the bette r tape to get a point across; you onl y did not want wings in a dorm; they part of the year she has acted as wanted their own houses. However , hear about the radical who cries both Recording and Corre sponding like everything on this campus , for immediate and total chan ge Secretary . And has devoted more and takes over a building to "deal ," this would have to go through time to Council and the College so to speak , "from a position of channels. This was one step toward Community than this college depower. " sorority housing and this was serves. In Monday 's New York Times blocked. So complain now about 5. As for the Presidents of ARW , the social life on campus , and there was an inte rview with three ARM , Day Men and Day Women; officers of the "national" S.D.S. complain because Bloomsburg if next year 's Presidents are any- doesn 't have any sorority houses "National" is in quotes because thing like this year 's Presidents , for social activities , but don 't let us the S.D.S. tend s to leave each chapCouncil will be better off without ter to do as it pleases. These three hear it. their presence or their vote. • "Is it fair for a Resident Advis- students actually - advocated overFinally, anyone who would care throwing our U.S. Government. or to cope with a gang or sororto look at the minutes of Council Now, that' s only the opinion of ity?" (By the way, name calling would find that Stan has made e.g. gang and cliques isn't consid- three out of a membe rship of about 10 major motion s this year. 10,000-plus. I cannot believe that ered part of constructive critiOf these motions , at least half of cism.) Any wing that' s halfway so- these people believe in freedom for them were for either suspension of ciable can be considered a "gang, " all students and in rational chan ge. the rules to consider business un- and R.A.'s are putting up with We seem to be coming into a reder miscellaneou s or for adjournvival of Joe McCarthy 's Red Scare. some dillies already. ment. Perhap s Stan should follow This sure isn't going to help "Is it fair that independent girls the adage that those who live in be forced to live on a floor that is change in colleges. We are going glass houses should not throw to see a clamp-down on all colhalf or partially housing a soro rity stones. leges. If you think things are bad clique?" As it stands now there arc In conclusion , Stan is behaving now , wait 'til they give the Kam pus many floors which have a majority like a sore loser. A sad condition Kops riot-contro l training. We of sorority girls now and the indefor a Jun ior in college—even if the were allowed to gather in Husk y a penden ts don 't seem to have been college is Bloomsburg. few months ago to attend the Open psychologically warped. Glo Wilson CGA meeting. Things were tense uur nuui is iJiuuuiiiuiumiy mj i u i then; what would it have been if ity, and the freshmen who were mace , lead-weighted billy clubs and Sorority Housing "forced" to live with us don 't riot guns were visible? Quite possiDear Editor: think it' s unbearable. No one bly, BSC' s own major campus-disIn response to the letter which thought to question whether fresh criticizes sorority housin g (May 2 men were being "forced" to live order. Farber 's article would be of issue of M&G ), we wish to prov ide with upperclassmcn. Regardless of concern to any parent or adKreat some answe rs and also re late some this so called "forcin g," rank as far ministrator. They are in a comforrelevant informatio n which was ov- as class or sororit y/inde pendent table rut and don 't care to climb goes is nonexistent. The freshmen erlooked by the composers of that out. Poverty exists; so does crime , one-sided attack. said that before the y were fully taxes , starvation , ignorance , prejuFirst , at the time when this emoacquainted they were wary of the dice , disease , war— I could go on tional display was written , ISC had upperclassmen factor but unaware and on. Only happiness and not "given itself permission " to of a sorority factor. PEACE don 't exist. Our elders say pu t through sorority housing. The No solution has been found as of they are happy while at the same thought was only under considerayet for the housinn enigma. Like ti on and has been for th e past few many ideas of advancement at BSC , time imagining the world they live in as a rapidly growing mush room months. If any of the girls who it has been stifled , for the present cloud. We can 't stand still! The were so violently opposed to it anyw ay. Perhaps when the puzzle status quo always hurts somebody. would have taken the time to atcomes once again to the surface , If a problem or need arises, face it tend the open ISC meeting on sor- peopl e will do more thinkin g and und take care of it. But stability j umporit y housing, they would have thin gs out and less talking is needed to avoid hopeless chaos. known that it was nothing near ing to conclusions. Perha ps then a Everybody talks about the weather , definite. ISC is glad to hear any solution to sororit y housing will lie but nobody does anything about it; p rob lems, any opinions; but the in reach. storm clouds arc gathering over the Signed , K irl s on ISC are only human and they can 't read minds. Next time Sisters and Inde pendents: there are any complaints , go to ISC Marsha Jupinu , dor Item- Fri. , Ma Y 9, 1969 MAROON & GOLD EUGENE LESCAVAG E But inttt Manager JOSEPH GRIFFITHS Editor-in-Chitl N»wt Editors DAVE MILIEU BILL TEITSWORTH , MICHAEL HOCK Spor/i Editort CLARK RUCH, VIC KEELER M anaging Editor Copy Editor TOM FUNK ALLAN MAURER , MIKE STUGRIN Ft atur * Editort Pholo orophy Editor MIKE O'DAY Art Dirtetor dor REMSEN Advrtitlng Managtr Circulotion Mono fltf , RICHARD SAVAGE, M hlmr JOHN DENNEN, Faculty Butlntti Conwltant Vol. XLVH. No. 44 NANCY STEPANOWICZ ROBERT CADINSKI Addi tional Staff , REPORTERS! M"" 1 " *'•>" •' Undo Ennii Glnny Pofttr l n D ™fh °£j f° ADVERTISING. Su|fln Seh.nek It is extremely interesting, I think , to listen to the comments concernin g the new volume of Gadfly which have st arted to p our forth. Generally, people seem to feel that the quality and content of the paper is acceptable and that it is again performing a service to t he coll ege. However , the comment relating to the paper , which I thought was great , was made by a facul ty membe r who is noted for Ms liberal views. He said something to this effect: "The Gadfl y is great as long as the people who write it don 't get into power. " Immediately I was struck with the wisdom of his statement and my faith in the sensibility of the facu lty wa s restored. In the editori al of the first Gadfly of the semester , the editor stated that the reason for his deciding to publish once more was because "the Maroon and Gold has again imposed censorship rules ... t h a t . . . endanger not only the fundamental rights of speech and pres s, but also that of free inquiry in an academic environment. " As far as I can ascertain , this statement was the result of a decision by the editor of the M&€ not to pub lish an article called "The Student as Nigger ," because it contained a larg e numbe r of off-color phra ses and words. As a feature editor of the paper , I offered to print the article , which I felt was a good one, if some of these offensive words and phr ases were deleted. This, of course , was not acceptable to the editor of the Gadfly and he accused me of being a coward and then proceeded to publi sh his own paper. Glaring Error There is, however, one comment which I feel forced to make about the entire matter and which also applies to a predominance of the so-called "liberal faction " of the college community. The editor of the Gadfly is clearly guilty of a glaring and terribly unwise inconsistency in both his reasoning and actions. Because he wanted to overcome the very minor censorship rules of the M&G , the editor of the Gadfly began to publish again. Why, however, did this editor censor the very article which he refused to print in its origin al form? How can the editor of the Gadfly accuse the M&G of self-imposed censorship when he imposes the same thing on his own paper? At best , his actions are inconsistent , but at worst , they are typical of an entire body of thinking which occurs at BSC. Of course the Gadfly contains other mat eria l besides t he "Student as Nigger " article , but this one inciden t seems to detract a great degree of the respectability which the G adfly enjoyed under Lylc Slac k last year. The trend in thinking, which I ment ioned a moment ago seems to elude being named , but p erha ps the word " su p erficial " might suffice. This body of thinking is characterized by a lack of self-control , a com p lete lack of di plomac y and tact , and an utter disre gard of common sense. For instance , we have seen a number of instance s at CGA meetin gs in which certain liberals displayed disgusting fits of impatience and lapses in good politics, Statements such as "I want the administration out of here " are simply not good sense. Walking out of Executive Committee meetings campus , and over tho country as a PHOTOGRAPHY. Tim Shannon '*"' • Pom Van Eppi FEATURE. OiiUcalJ U^l d t<"' ' COPY. Ellin Rolfmon Kq thy Roorty TYPISTS. Prlicllla Clark £2. z£S Th« MAROON 4 GOLD It loeattd on th« iKond floor o( Waller Mall. Niwt may bt lubml tttd by calling 784-4640, Ext. 323, or by contacting lh» pop»r through Box 301, Th» MAROON & GOLD, o tnimbw of 1h» Ptnniytaanla S*ot » College Pr»n Attoclatlon , t» pubMihtd at n»or bl -w»»k\y at poiilblt by, for and through lh» (mi of the itudtnti of Bloomiburg Stot * Colltgc, Bloomibu rg, Ptnniylvanlo. All opinions txprmid by eolumnlfti and foaturt wrlltn, Including lt>t»n-to-th»Milror , or* not ntctiiarlly thoi * ol thlt publication but thou ol th» Individuals. whole. Do wo stand under the tree , to be struck by lightning, or do we seek a chan ge such as going into a buildin g equipped with a lightning rod? It' s now growin g close to the time when we , as young adults , will be "tho Establishment. " I don't support the John Birchore; I don 't support the New Left. I advocate a liberal dose of moderation to keep us from lighting a (Ire which could destroy us, 'Well , the Gadfly has come of age; now it is slightly right of the New Left. Lots of luck, boys: I hope you don't light the fuse to a keg of dynamite Instead of your pipe. Rubs Griffiths ^ accomplishes nothing except contributin g even more to the' truth of , a "student as nigger" concept Going into an open hearing and abru ptly making demands and accusations is hardly good manner s or even simple logic. Advocating t hat we sta ge a demonstration and th en askin g "What should we dem- , onstrate about ?" borders on simple stupidity. Poster iors Exposed But enough of this, the list is too l on g and de pressin g. The point I am tr ying to make, is that the reason progress is slow and sporad ic at BSC is tha t our "liberals " consistentl y and .almost willingly make asses out of themse lves. How can p rogress b e made when at facult y meetin gs, professors rise , and in a ' t orren t of b iti ng sarcasm , make their liberal views known? That course of action , I think , is one of the easiest ways to turn people off to listening to your ideas. Because this college is so drearily middle-class and thus conservat ive, nothing can be^.accomplished from the high-pressure , no-thinking tactics which we have seen so often. I do not think I would be too wron g in saying that one of the reasons why the current Dean of Students was appointed , was because of all the noisy and opposition which uncoordinated was voiced . Perhaps if we would have had some concerted action , the appointment would havfc at least been held in abeyance. Illusive Solution The situation , as I have described it, unfortunatel y does exist , but , however, I am unable to supply a solution at the present time. One thing which we must have , of course , is some sort of organization 'which would present a program of concerted action and coherent demands. This organization would exist for the single purpose of rationally discussing the needed reforms and in formulating ways to bring them about. Presently, however, there are too many people around here who are imbued with the shrill of their own voices and th e smell of t he ir own swea t . They accuse others of censorship, while practicing it themselves; they demand reforms , but can't decide how to get them; they like the reputation of being liberals and "pr o" student , but they're really sophists; they want to free students from their yoke of nigge r, but they 're just niggers to another master. As we prepare for exams and get r ead y for t h e summer , it might be wise to consider this thought: At BSC we have rightists , Neo-Nazi s, and pseudo-liberals. Although all of these people have their faults , the y are , at least , invo lved. Wh y not join the political forum and help them out? Howeve r, don 't wai t too long, one of them ma y come t o p ower. S Uaiphi f i o m Stan Continued from last Wedneiday by Stan Rakowski He made the "ridiculous " state- . ment that the former kin g and also beloved and loyal man of the reall y common people , should not ri ghtfull y have been king (even going ho far as to try to hold u p his coronation ) but late r on played along with him also. But nevertheless, ho worked for the election of our . fair kni ght , and even thou gh he had the re putati on of being an albatross around one 's neck , it appeared that this time his boat had finally come In. Naturall y after havin g worked throu gh the entire realm for the elevation of our fair kni ght (and even having gone so far as to take credit for the entire affair ) , tho jeste r expected the respect and homage that should rightfully have been his, But my, how dismayed ho became when the king set. up his court and .failed to Include the (Contin u td on pagt 3) Clarif ication Hooks & Slices . West Chester will agai n be the team to beat for the Penn sylvania Conference golf title May Il-I2v at Hershe y, with Larry Moore, Ed Ken yon, Bill Hoffman and Ron Livezey all returning fr om the ' cham pions hip team of 1968. Moore , the conference cham p, recen tly shot a one-un der 69 against Dr exel with no one on the team scoring over t. 77. WC won the matc h , 13-5. The y've also bea t en Hav enfo r d, St. Jose ph' s, East Stroudsburg, tied Perm and narrowly lost to Dela- ware. In the Rams victory over Stroud , Ed Kenyo n needed a 71 to beat Steve Gut er , 2-1. Guter is the 196869 Pennsy lvania Cbnfcren ca basketball i 'scoring champ. John Schmidt recently led Clarion to a quad meet victory over Indiana , Thiel and Edinboro , shooting a 69. Also scoring for Clarion , runn er-up in the conference meet last year , were vets Ed Malek 77, Al Weingartner 74 and Norm Jula 72, and newcomer s Chris Tyner 72 and John Hafer a 77. In "West Chester 's 7-0 trouncing of St. Joseph' s, Moore scored a one-u p nod over Hawk number one and Delawar e State amateur champion Bob Mu rphy. Tom Castril li'hit a 73 in a onepoint BSC win over Stroud. Ted Boula s' 75 took medal honors as Slippery Rock whipped California , 12-6. Paul Bakas and Tom Stauffer shared low score of 77 for California. Left io Right: Ken Drake, Denn is P lymette , Carl Nauroth , Len Thomas and Dave Sheaffe r. Not shown: Secretary Linda Clark and Team Advisor-Driver , Dr. Gilbert Selders. Rooks 2nd In PC CLT The BSC Chess Team finishe s a winning season by takin g second place in the Penns ylvania College Chess League Tournament , held at Shiptffensburg State College last weekend. Their only loss was to Dickinson , whose team recentl y finished seventh overall in a nationwide college tournament. Dickinson also wal ked away with the PCCL trophy, by becoming Western Division cham pions and then defeating BSC, the Eastern Division winners. The Husk y .Rooks had to get past F&M , Muhlenber g and a tough Lehigh team to take division honors. Dickinson 's competition included Gettysbur g, ' Shippensburg State , and Messiah. Len Thomas , Husky first board and the only graduatin g senior , had never won an individual troph y until the SSC tourney, where he won two. One was for best score on first board , and th e other was f or second place in a special "rapid transit" tourney (time limit 5 minutes per player ) , where he lost only to Pete Flowers of Dickinson. Len is ending a great chess career at BSC, and the team will miss him. The Husky Rooks also won their 9th consecutive Pennsylvania State College Chess championship, defeating the only challenger , Shippensburg, by a score of 4-0. The team 's overall year 's record is 7-2-1, compiled by Len Thomas , Carl Nauroth , Ken Drake , Dennis Plymette (who also serves 'as treasurer) , and Dave "Frosh" Sheaffe r (who is the equi pment custodian ). In addition , the learn would gel nowhere without the hard work and time freely given by Linda Clark , our secretary, and Dr. Gilbert Selders , faculty advisor who does all the driving for away matches. j ester , or any of his prote ge's hi it! But this is how our fair knight worked for again we must remember that t he word and idea of friendshi p and truthfu lness was, in Epsilon is a new card game that his vocabulary, either short-lived , originated in the Dutch Low Counor non-ex istent! tries and the countryside of what My what a stink the jester made from thi s, but alas , no one was is present-day Netherlands. The name is derived from the fifth rea lly listening to him anymore for he seemed t o be not hi ng bu t an Greek letter of the Greek alphabet archaic reminder of the past ! Even and refers to a peculiar tradin g when he t ried to a ll y h imse lf w it h variation in one of the optional the fair knight' s adver sar y to the ways of playing Epsilon. The number of cards needed to throne , he was shunne d here a lso and told to go (using the age-old play Epsilon is 100. This number is obtained in combining a straight cliche ) "fly a kite." And so our fair kni ght , now a s deck and a pinochle deck. From king, ruled the realm. It made no t wo to ten persons can pl ay a t a difference to him or his equally time. stu pid cohorts , that he had cheatThe game is not played as a ed , lied, connived, con t riv ed , and power game. That is, it is not like attacked , to gain his ends , f or t h is p oker , pinochle j or black j ack where the high cards take the low was just his "character. " How h e roared when he t hought ' cards or the highest value overback on how he had been pullin g powers a lesser value. Epsilon is and had pulled the wool over his more of a cut-throat point-game subject 's eyes. "What petty, idiotic where the playe r with the most and A# l jackass fools the y are ," points at the end of an arbitrar y he spurted. "What arc rules for if number of hands (usually 21) is they 're not to be brok en? Besides, the winner. now I' m kin g and I make the The play is begun with an anticlockwise deal from the dealer rules. " And so with all of this , our fair around the table until all of the kni ght , now kin g, began his reign cards are dealt. The dealer alwa ys over the people of tho realm and receives the first card in the deal. all did not live ha ppily thereafter! In the case of the number of players being such that all players don 't get the same number of cards , for get it. The effect of the extra cards in one player 's hand is not th at great that it will alter the final result of the game. Besides, as the game continues , each player should have several opportunities to have more cards than some of his opponents. The several variations of Epsilon have to do with the trading of cards. By the fi rst method , each player passes two cards to the player on his immediate right. After he is dealt his cards , he scans them , and then picks out two cards that have little point value. He then passes these cards to the player on his right and takes two cards from the playe r on his left , hoping they will increase his score more than the two he'gave away. Another method of play is the trading of any number of cards with another pl a yer. Th is is lim it ed t o one trade in each hand excep t in the fifth hand where the pla yer can trade as man y times as he desires. The name— Epsilon—is derived from this fif th-handed trading policy. This method is not as restricted as the previous method and at times can be pretty hectic. E psilon , althou gh appearing to be a ra ther scatterb rained and incoherent game, is reall y interesting once you get Involved in the different variation s and tho scorin g method, In scorin g it is possible to get from 10 to 100 points. Ten aces in your hand , called a clean sweep, Ik DEADLINE ht Pilot Info: MAY 16 StOH (Continued from page 2) Epsilon WANTED) Reipom lblo party to take ovtr low monthly payments on a tp lntt piano. Can be teen locally. WW/ei Credit manager P;O. Box 35 Cortland , Ohio Campnspoits Mr. Haupt and Mr. Cortez are keeping BSC men of North and Elwell Halls in top competitive spirit. The foosball tourney was wrapped up on Thursday night as the men vied for prizes in the final. Mr. Haupt was also pleased to see the enthusiasm for the Shea Stadium tonight. Pool Tourney in New North Mr. Cortez said that much enthusiasm was shown by the "hustlers " in New Ndrth for the pool tournament. Out of 66 contestants there were only 2 forfeits at the end of, the third week of competition. The semi-finals were finished up on Tuesday night. Mr. Cortez said that there were a lot of good shoote rs and the competition was pretty stiff. Weight room facilities will be available in New North in the near futu re . Further details will be avail able in the next issue or by contacting Mr. Cortez. worth 100 points; 1 ace , 3 kings , 3 q ueens , and 3 jacks—a royal family—is worth 90 points; three ladies, all three Queens of Hearts , are worth 80 points; eight one-eyed ru ler s are 2 Kin gs of diamonds , t hree J acks of Hearts , and three Jacks of Spades , and is worth 70 points . A bad run is worth 60 p oints and consists of a ll card s equal to or less than 10. A good run is a hand with all cards equa l to or greater than 10 and this is worth 50 p oints. A lon g run is a strai ght lon ger than five cards and worth 40 pts. A short run Is a plain five-card strai ght. In both the long run and the short run you can add five points if the strai ght is a strai ght \ Fulltime Work This Summer FIFTEEN $1,000.00 CASH SCHOLARSHIPS Earn In Exceu of $133.00 Per Week ... with plenfy of time for Boating, Swimming, Golf... WIN ONI OF MANY ALL IXPINII PAID TRIPS TO LONDON , INOLAND I . Some Qualified Students May Work Overieas Next Summer — BASIC REQUIREMENTS - ' 1, Must be dver 18. / 2. Six monthi of college. / 3, Neat appearance , Thou iludtnli who ivcc»nMly compkl * fh» tummtr may eonllnut th ilr emaciation with ui ntxt tummti on a part-lim * batit, ft lnferv/»w by Appointment only — Call MR. COOK 1 Phlla. 346-OJ60 / Camdtn 1609) 944-3SS9 / Reading (31S) 3730849 WilkM-Sarre y Chief Pisyaov and proceeded to take over the excavated area. Sweeping past a group of plumbers , the mob quickly occupied the Job-Johnny and planned to stage a "sit-on" to force the administra-v tion to allow certain members to leave the area to call their mothers when it got dark. The list of demands handed over to the president of the college included : a) State aid to all supe r liberals to help defray the expense of pipe tobacco, cok e, and war surplus army ja ckets. b) Purchase of two and a half tons of peach-fuzz used in the 1965 Remington commercials to be used by those students who do not have the hormonal capacity to produce their own facial decorations. c) A truckload of horse manure to construct new members. This list was nailed to the wall of the Upon the dismissal of Ukier Skaklassi as Prime Minister of Albania , the Republic of the Congo delivered an ultimatum to the King of Saudi Arabia telling him that unless the slave-trade with France was discontinued at once, Morocco would not allow President Nixon to visit Nepal. This aroused a furor in Tristan Da Cunha which may culminate in that country 's removal from the British Commonwealth. The Italian Ambassador to Guinea is reported to have told Prime Minister Harold Wilson that Poland is planning to boycott the European Common Ma rket by infiltrating its ranks with Danish Cheese merchants. Subsequently, the Maldive IsJohnny by the chief while some of his followers were stuffin g their pipes with crushe d deodorant cakes in hopes of getting a cheap "high ," and others were rootin g through the Johnny to get more plans . The day was saved by the GSA who moved the entire congre gation to Pottsville where a twentyseven story sewage plan t is under construction. If you are having more than ten ... VISIT BILL HESS' TAVERN THIS WEEKEND! Nice M usic — Nice Atmosphere COLLEY r<- Harr y Logan Barber Shop Fine J ewelry Mon. Tues. , 9 Thurs. ) <*¦"¦- & P ™Sat. Fri. 9 a.m. -9 p.m. / Closed Wed. 486 W. MAIN ST. ^^~\ lands , anticipating defeat in the Crimea , have d ecided t o at tack the Spanish capit al , Madrid. Unless the Portuguese Ar my, under the command of Simon Bolivar , can stop the Irish Air Forc e from bombing London , Great Britain will be unable to aid the Andorr ans against the combined forces of the Spanish and the Maldivians . This shocking development prodded the Uniteu" Nations Security Council to plac e economic sanction on Mongo lia for allowing the Canadian SDS movement to succeed in occupying Lake Champlain. Guatamala , seeing their chance to take over Central America , invaded British Honduras in order to get back at Queen Elizabeth for refusing the aid of the CARE unit of Finland. When the governor of Texas heard of the invasion , he immediately shot his Spanish-born dog three times in the head and declared , "long live the dead dog state!" He is now resting comfortably in an Oklahoma sanitarium. Pitcairn Island was torpedoed and sunk by the Imperial Navy of Samoa in protest of the rising prices of beer from Togo. The British flag, which once was forever in sunlight , now appears to be sinking into every body of water on earth. Further developments in the Pacific indicate thaV the ocean is going to pot and soon will be drained to make way for the expandin g highway systems of Pennsylvania 's Governor Raymond P. Shafer. Madagascar was invaded without warning by a rabid hoard of Pelicans reported to have been sent from the Seychelles. In addition , Angola is slowly losing its longdrawn war with Czechoslovakia which has been going on secretl y for three centuries. In Ifni , the Consulate of Trinidad was bombed today by a herd of wild chimpanzees which escaped from a passing tramp steamer bound for Wales to pick up the yearly banana shipment. These and other disruptions about the globe are rumored to be the result of a conspiracy amon gst the Trapest Monks of Bulgaria , who now control the bat guano trade of the Maldive Islands. _ _ and Repairing Your J eweler Away jrum Home 5 W. Main St. Bluomshuuo I ._ .—^ ^ ^ a. ^ ^ ^h ^ ^ ^h ^h. ^ ^k ^ ^ h ^ k ^ b^ k ^ h . ^ k ^ h ^ & ^ k A 18 W. Main St. ; i BLOOMSBURG, PA. i Hallmark Cards Gifts | ft — OPEN UNTIL MIDNIGHT FRI. & SAT. Sundays & Daily — 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. O WAFFLE GRILLE PAUL DIETER , Prop . DOOMSDAY " VOL. 0 , No. 0 Bill Blomia Tom Sleezix assorted fairies Editor Assoc. Editor Staff Becker Motor Co. Alchy VOLKSWAGEN p .- L j-ixu -ij- _ u _ri_nj- i_rijxr ^M M M M M A M M i -u-u-u-Li-o-ui_ iu- uuL_j SHOP 112 W. Main Ai$mb$r Mind D t f i U Inturtntt Ccrpotttkn ^M M M M M M M M M M M M M il ijTj -uxji u i j DRESS FARMERS NATIONAL OFFICE • BLOOMSBURG, PA. M i M M M Haul... MAREE'S Rts. 11 / 15 SELINSGROVE , PENNA. 743-1514 JVIhNTERS NATIONAL BANK CHOPS, BEEF-BURGERS Phent 784-7937 HORSEFLY Apply now f or next year 's f inancing. CHARCOAL BROILED STEAKS SANDWICHES & SALADS * There was also a need to identify with somebody and we felt that we could identify with Chicken Man faster than with Winnie , who has some conservative tendencies. Q: Wh at' s that thin g between you r legs? A: A drum . Q: Why do you always have it with you? A: Well , it was a toss up between a drum and Winnie the Pooh. A drum is easier to carry than Winnie and besides , if you can get Winnie the Pooh between your legs, you're hurting, haby . • Q: Why do you wear moccasins instead of shoes? A: Well , it was a toss up between moccasins and Winnie the Pooh and if you ever get Pooh on your feet , your hurting, baby. Q: I understan d that most indian names have a meaning. What does yours mean? A: Very literally translated it means, "He who comes with great urgency to stand before the falling star and vindicate himself; one who vindicates himself because he has been grieviously wronged and ..." (at this point it becomes a bit redundant. ) Following this question , the chief raised two fingers. He was asked if this was the international peace symbol and he repl ied, "No. it means I have to go." At that point he went. A DEPENDENT PUBLICATION 5 Jet. of Route 11 and Interstate 80 / Exit 36 We Cater To Eviryon * and Serve Only Choice Chief Pisyaov , a Grad Student from Plavitt , Wyoming, is this week' s Horsefl y PMOC. The chief has become famous about the campus for organizing the SFA and demanding Aboriginal Studies. The following is an informal interview with the chief. Q: What is the purpose of the SFA and what are its plans? A: Our basic purpose is to provide enough activities to keep kids here on weekends. As far as plans , our first objective is to conquer the "job J ohnnie " up on the construction site. "We will use that as our headquarte rs and then organize enough people to flush every toilet on campus at the same time , thus destroying the campus sewer system , and simultaneousl y causing a sewer back-up into the b?thioom in the president' s house flooding the building with objectional refuse , drenching the president with noxious smelling liquid , thus causing the DPI to relieve him of his position because his lack of personal hygiene would deem him to be "unbecomin g a college president. " Q: We notice that the SFA has adopted a flag with a picture of Chicken Man printed on it. What does this flag signify? A: We really dig liber als , so it was a t oss u p bet ween Ch ick en M an and W innie the Pooh . We cou ld n 't get the copyri ghts on Winnie 's picture so Ch icken Man won. Phone 784-2561 BLOOM BOWL We Invite You To Dine With Us Everyday and Sundays Too ~_~ j inm |iiuiniii |niiui |in||n|||||ii|||ii||iiiiiiM |iiii||||uiii|iiiiiiii Mii|||ii| yillHllMltltliiHl ll«ll«lilillllli "llllttl _^ Miller Office Supply Co. THE WMIillMmiiMlBillMllllllilMli _ ; i : i ^ Chief Of SFA Exclusive Interview ^J ' ¦ - - ¦ i— , - j j .j . _ . ¦ii . . . _r*