Goodbye Graduates! COLLEGE TIMES Best of Luck! State Teachers College, Lock Haven, Penna. VOL. VIII.—NO. 14. S. T. C. HONORED AT EDUCATORS' MEETING THURSDAY, JANUARY 15, 1931 'Times" Entered in Contest Gilbert Ross, Noted American Scholastic Press Association Violinist, Delights Audience 5 Cents Per Copy LOCAL VARSITY OPENS BASKETBALL SEASON On Friday evening, January 9, GilThe new year of 1931 brings with it the announcement of the Seventh bert Ross, violinist, presented a conDr. Armstrong and Mr. Patter- Annual Convention and Contest of cert given as the third number of the Bardo, Hager and Weber Lead the Columbia .Scholastic Press As- Musical Artists Course for 1930-31. S. T. C. Scorers in Openingson Given Posts in Education sociation, held each year at Columbia Mr. Ross, young, delightful and thorUniversity, in New York City. At a oughly American, whose entire musGames of the Season and J. H. S. Departments recent meeting the members of Alpha ical education has been obtained in Opening the 1930-31 basketball At the annual meeting of the Penn- Zeta Pi voted to enter the College this country, easily won over an apsylvania State Education Association, Times in this contest, carrying on a preciative audience by his personal- season the Raiders lost to the veteran ity as well as by his exquisite art. West Chester Teachers quintet at that which was held at Williamsport De- precedent e-stablished several years The first group in the evening pro- place December 12 by score of 47-21. cember 30 and 31, 1931, Dr. Dallas ago. Complying with the rules of the gram was composed of two Chorales Bardo, acting as captain, led the local W. Armstrong, President of our College, was elected Vice President of contest, all issues of the Times since by Bach and the Concerto in G minor scorers with four field goals, closely the Department of Higher Education, the opening of the fall semester have by Bruch, all of which gave striking followed by Weber with three field and Mr. Allan Patterson, Principal been sent to the contest headquarters evidence of his superb technique and goals. of the Training School, was chosen as at Columbia, in preparation for the wonderful sureness of touch. The secThe second game of the season, Secretary for the J. H. S. sectional i judging, the results of whien will be ond group played by Mr. Ross includ- with the Jersey Shore Centrals, was meeting which is to be held in Pitts- announced in the Convention to be ed two delightfully lively Spanish se- won by the locals on the home court lections, while the third and last j Dcember 20, by the score of 25-2',. I held March 12, 13 and 14. burgh next year. A new phase of the year'fs C. S. P. group was made up of five numbers [The lead see-sawed back and forth for The general theme of the convention was "Improvement in Classroom A. contest is contained in the an- and two encore selections, one of I some time, then the Raiders forged Instruction." The efforts of the as- nouncement that the Writer's Club, which was the familiar Waltz in A i ahead to keep the lead for the remainder of the game. The scorers sociation followed three definite de- of Columbia, will award gold medals Major by David Halstheim. partments of endeavor: the Adminis- I to the best poem, story, and article The program was so finely render- were again led by Bardo, with four trative, the Philanthropic, and the i published in a C. S. P. A. member ed that it gave clear evidence of the field goals and a foul, followed by publication between February 1, deserved fame which has already been Weber with four field goals. Hal Professional. accorded Mr. Ross both in America Poust acted as captain. Several teachers from our College 1930, and February 1, 1931. and abroad. The third game of the season, attended this Conference: Dr. Franplayed at Dickinson Seminary Januces Coppens, Mr. Patterson, Mr. Ul- Alpha Zeta Pi Elects New ary 9, was won by the down-river five mer, Mr. MacDougall, Miss Himes, Officers for Next Semester Art Club Holds Successful by the score of 32-23. The locals playMiss Barkhuff, Miss Holaway, Mr. Etching Exhibit and Movie ed the Ministers to a stand-still for Sr-nith and Mr. Koch. At the regular meeting of Alpha the first three quarters and then Dr. Coppens was present at the The movie reel on etching, sponsor- seemed to lose their stuff. Capt. Bardo Conference on Tuesday, December Zeta Pi new officers were elected for 30. In the section for college teachers the next semester. John Haberstroh ed by the Art Club, which was given again led the attack by scoring three of Education there were three ad- was chosen president, succeeding in the auditorium at 7.30 o'clock last field goals and a foul, followed closely dresses given in the morning. The flrst Royce Johnson, who graduates next Wednesday evening, pleased a large by Hager, a new find, with three one was by Carroll D. Champlin, week, and Fay Bittner was elected number of students and teachers. In double-deckers. Pennsylvania State College, on the vice president, with Margaret Bee- the reel, Mr. Frank W. Benson, a Other members of the squad who subject, "Tested Techniques in Col- son, treasurer, and Edith Furst, sec- well-known etcher of Salem, Massa- saw service in at least one of these lege Teaching." Following this, C. C. retary. Following the business meet- chusetts, gave a complete demonstra- three games are; McMullen, Piumrncr, Ellis, President of Juniata College, irg the pledge members were formal- tion of the steps in the etching pro- Cooke, Cowfer, Gunderman, McLean, into the organization. cess. Mr. Benson, whose favorite Bob Smith, Marshall and Hamnuvkai-. < C o i i t i i i e s e d o n pii^^e '.l> ly initiated These pledges, who have been doing theme is wild geese and marshes, The next game will be played Janacceptable work for almost two showed himself a consummate artist uary 10 on the local court with MansSeniors Vote to Include the months, include Kermit Stover, Paul in the etching field. field Teachers College furnishing the Price of a Praeco in Dues Bundy, Janice Sharpe, Audrey Finn, This movie reel served as an intro- opposition. Let's get out and show the Marion Francisco, Molly Hamman, duction to an exhibit of contemporary boys that we're with them in their At the senior class meeting, held Polly Barndt, Metro Kost, Mirabelle prints which was shown from Wednes- attempt to "get going." last Thursday, it was decided by a Eliason, and Mary Thompson. Three day to Saturday in the Art room. Th's large majority of votes to include the pledges, Myrna Lundy, Olive Livings- exhibit displayed the various kinds of price of a Praeco in the class dues ton, and Jane Rathgeber, were unable prints—etchings, aquatints, mezzo- Dr. Hoben Gives Criteria tints, wood engravings, steel engravwhich will this year amount to $7.50 to attend the initiation. For Successful Teaching Other results of this meeting include Following initiation the new presi- ings and lithographs. There were fifthe appointment by the president of dent announced that the staff would ty-seven artists represented in this Dr. C. F. Hoben, Director of Visthe various committees for the an- hold a party tomorrow evening in exhibit, a fact which lent much to its ionary Education, Department of Innual senior ball, which will this year honor of Sylvia Sykes and Royce success. The great variety of subject struction, Harrisburg, addressed the be held February 14th. These com Johnson, who will be graduated at matter used for the prints showed the .students of the college in the audimodern trend of the art of etching, torium Tuesday morning. Doctor Homittees are: Music, William Sweet mid-semester. proving that it is making a marked ben talked to us on "Improvements and Robert Bollinger; Invitations and departure from the use of the more or of Classroom Instruction by VisionPrograms, Laura Smith, Edith Furst, less conventional subpects. Anne Thomas; Decorations, Bernice Strickland Gilliland Gives ary Education." Moran, Anna Sigmund, Elsie Mayes, Humorous Talk at Chapel The rise in popularity of the etch- There are four points which the Betty Dalby, Anna Mary Gilson, Eving during the past year rtiade doubly teacher must possess if he or she is elyn Bosworth, Eileen Phillips, Helen Thursday afternoon, December 18, interesting both the exhibit and the to teach pupils with success: Greaser, Helen Schmoyer, Francis 1930, at 3.00 o'clock the student body movie reel. I. In all teaching there must be Stokes, Hyle Walizer, James Risch, assembled in the auditorium to hear certainty. Have concrete ideas George McMullin, Lester McCall, Wd- the great humorist, Strickland Gilliof things you teach. Sun rise liam Sweet, Norman Lohr, Marvin land. Wondering just what to expect, II. Blend school training with life Lee, Quentin Wolfe, James Renning- the entertainment being a surprise, Pearly rose clouds float situations. er, and Alton Miller. the students were just about to preUp in the sky— III. Thoroughness. Train pupils to Like apple trees Still another committee was ap- pare themselves for a lecture when be masters of a few things, Blossoming in the spring. pointed to take charge of the senior Mr. Gilliland told us that he came to not "Jack of all Trades." They change into bars caps and gowns. This committee in- visit with us and to bring us joy. No IV. Cultivate originality. Of gold cludes Lester McCall, Elsie Mayes, one could have been more truthful Doctor Hoben told of his journey Gertrude Marks, Hyle Walizer ancl than he, for the auditorium was ringAnd melt into creamy light. abroad where he saw the School Jotiring with laughter most of the time. Betty Kell. B. MACHTLEY. < ( ' o i i t l i i n e < l o n |i:ijL;-e 2> COLLEGE TIMES UNCLE PAUL SAYS Pennsylvania Offers Special League of Nations Award The Pennsylvania branch of the League of Nations Association has offered an additional prize in the League of Nations Essay Contest recently announced in this paper. Hoping for a wide enrollment in this state, the Pennsylvania branch offers a prize of $25 for the best paper submitted from Pennsylvania. The contest is open to students of Teachers Colleges. The first prize—a trip to Europe—will be awarded to the person writing the best thesis on one of the five particular subjects dealing with the League of Nations; the second prize consists of $100; the third of $50. In addition there are to be local prizes. The prizes will be awarded for the best thesis on one of the following subjects: (1) Practical suggestions for including the aims, organization and work of the League of Nations in the elementary school curriculum for geography, history, civics, English and wherever else appropriate. (2) A review of major world problems and events discussed during the past six months, and their relation both actual and potential to the League of Nations, with suggestions for their presentation to students. (3) Concrete methods whereby the everyday experiences of the modern child may be used to lead him to regard cooperation as the "normal method of conducting world affairs." (4) Armistice Day and Goodwill Day; suggested programs for school observance of these two days, together with plans for preliminary and subsequent class room work. (5) The organization of the League of Nations, its principals, and their application; methods of presenting these concepts to children under twelve. A. S.T. Formal Initiation Bittersweets Initiate On Saturday, December 20, 1930, the Alpha Sigma Tau Fraternity had formal initiation in their rooms at 1.30. The new members are: Jane McGirk, Alma Soyster, Margaret Dorries, Florence Priddy, Betty De Frehn, Gwen Radebach, Mary Pox, Mary Sharp, Elizabeth Heim, Dorothy Risch, and Alva Williams. Due to the illness of Mary Thompson she was not initiated, but will be shortly. At the regular meeting on Friday, January 2, the Alpha Sigma Tau's elected their new leaders for the coming semester. Mildred Allen will succeed Al Read as president, with Peg Gschwendtner vice president. Marguerite Fogle treasurer, and Helen Greaser secretary. Since Dorothy Palmer graduates in January, Caroline Shultz will be the A. S. T. InterSorority Council representative. When all is said and done, it was not so bad after all—the informal B. S. X. initiation which la.sted from 1.15 to 4.30 P. M. on Saturday. Formal initiation of pledge members was held at 7.00 o'clock in the sorority room when seventeen girls were taken into the organization. The B. S. X. roster is now composed of thirty-four girls. R. 0. L. At their regular meeting on Monday, the R. O. L.'s decided to have their formal initiation on Saturday afternoon. Riverview Cabin is Scene W. A. A. Christmas Party Uncle Paul says that he never knew that there were so many Agitated's and Lovesick and Brokenhearted's, etc., in all the world as there are among readers of the Times. He is simply deluged with inquiries. In fact Uncle Paul says that he really needs at least two assistants to aid him in handling his correspondence; consequently he will be in his oifice in the 'rimes Building from twelve to two o'clock Friday afternoon and will be pleased to confer with any young ladies or gentlemen who feel that they might be interested in becoming his assistants. The only requirement is a complete knowledge (gained by experience) of the various trials and tribulations which toss thorns along the path traversed by lovers. Dear Uncle Paul: I am in a terrible predicament and do hope you can help me. My best boy friend insists upon calling me his "sweet little bunny" and I don't like it at all. Honestly, Uncle Paul, I'm no bunny (unless I may be one of those dumb bunnies I hear about). IVly mother is Scotch and my father is English and if this makes me a bunny, then what would I be if my mother were Chinese and my father Indian? Please, Uncle Paul, tell me how to break my boy friend of this habit, because I don't want to give him up, but I'll have to if he keeps calling me such funny names. Sincerely, AGITATED. About fifty enthusiastic members of the Women's Athletic Association journeyed by truck to Riverview at 4.30, December 18, for about two 1928 hours of hilarious enjoyment at the Kathleen Spangler, of Johnstown, Harvey cabin. was married on December 31, 1930, A forcguard of six girls "had left to Warren Smucher. Mr. and Mrs. previously to prepare camp, and were Smucher are now living near Boston, present when the other girls arrived. ]My Dearest Agitated: Massachusetts, where Mr. Smucher is A delicious lunch of weiners, coffee I am indeed sorry to hear of your an associate pastor. Mrs. Smucher and cake was served. Then even some has been teaching the sixth grade at spooks appeared in the attic for tho extreme, heartbreaking trouble and Ferndale since her graduation. "Dit- c-ntertainment of the guests. That I shall try to do all I can to assist you. ty" was a member of the Alpha Sig- Santa had been there was evidenced But, as I imagine you already see, ma Tau Traternity and was president by comic' gifts which he had left for this is a much too delicate matter to of the Y. W. C. A. during her last all, including some for Miss Holoway, i answer by a public vehicle such as a newspaper so I believe for our mutual DR. C. F. HOBEN AT CHAPEL year here. Miss Edgerton and Miss Dixon. satisfaction and for your ass'stance you had better come and see me per(<-or.tliiiie 1929 sonally. You might bring your best ney utilized. England and Germany boy friend along with you when you Chrissie Lambert has secured a poare using this visionary education and come, provided, of course, that he the results are noticeably dfferent sition at Duke Center. to be the one who calls you Josephine Schenck spent the week happens from those reached in America. For j his "sweet little bunny," for othercrd at her home in Hovv^ard. exiimple, the high school pupils take 1930 wise he could be of no use and might * ** more interest in an education which May Ellenberger ancl Marion Dale, only cause complications. results in the high intelligence of the who are both teaching at State ColEileen Phillips visited Gertrude See me tomorrow afternoon at 4.30 pui)il. The pupil who sees the people lege, were here for a while over the Keetler at State College Saturday and o'clock at my room in the Times whom he is studying, how they work week end. Sunday. Building. I * * * and live, has far more interest in Hoping I will be able to help you, Fay Lord, a kindergartener at Ardthem. It is the policy of England to Hazel Troxell visited her home in I am. pi- iduce quality rather than quanftv. more, Pennsylvania, dropped in on Johnstown over the week end. Yours, They are thorough in their work, mak- her friends for a few minutes a short UNCLE PAUL. ing sure that the work is understood time ago. It is rumored that Peg Gardiner | irerfectly. This is done by the school Miss F. Mary Nevling sailed from •md Skinny Russell couldn't be tied | journeys. In Germany the pupils s;e Los Angeles on January 5 for the here for a week end. Anyway the last Girls' Basketball Practice what they learn in books. Throughout Philippine Islands, where she will en- ore found them returning home as Germany they have made it possible gage in evangelistic work. Miss Nev- usual. Still Evoking Enthusiasm for the pupils to see their Germany as j ling, who graduated from L. H. S. T. * * * they study it. In other words their i C. in the class of '30, left for the Girls' basketball is still jvoing Mary Beaver spent Saturday and education is concrete and has a rela- coast Christmas night and arrived at strong. If you don't, believe this, ask tion to the life of the pupil. Educa- 1Los Angeles January 1. Her address Sunday in Williamport. any of the girls who are out practiction in America, according to Dr. Ho-1 will be Cotabato City, Mindanao, Phil- 1 Gertrude Marks and Vera Conrad ing every week. They work hard and bon, would prove more profitable if' ippine Islands. I represented the usual Altoona delega- like it. Of all the girls who reported the academic work would be linked i tion which departed from S. T. C. on for pract'ce the first night, just a few with the concrete examples instead of 1 Margaret Armstrong, class of 1930, Saturday. dropped out. However those who learning a lot of abstract ideas that j spent the Christmas holidays at her stuck out the first few practices are home here. She is teaching at Drexel have no bearing on life itself. Mabelle Winkleblech, another of making up for the lost members. Hill, Philadelphia. Miss Armstrong is our ardent home-lovers, was at her If you have never seen a girls' basMiss Ashton Hatcher, one of the the daughter of President D. W. Arm- home in Millheim during the past ketball game, now is the time to bestrong, and graduated from the kinnew members of our faculty, spent gin. The various teams play against 1 week end. her Christmas vacation at her home dergarten primary course of S. T. C each other every Tuesday from 4.10 in 1930. in Richmond, Virginia. She stated that Miss Selma Atherton, an art in- to 5.00. Don't think these are slow, weather was extremely cold, broken structor in our college, spent a de- uninteresting games, because the girls by a occasional heavy fall of snow. Lynchburg, Virginia, welcomed ' lightful Christmas vacation visiting show plenty of spirit and provide (The Essex must have been on its home Miss Roach, the Music instruc- her friends and relatives at her home many thrills. Come out and see for good behaviour.) tor substituting for Miss Whitwell. yourself. in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Alumni Notes Us and Others ,1c ^ 4c COLLEGE TIMES hill to the boys' glen, around COLLEGE TIMES jI tooverthethegirls' glen, and down to the Monologues of a Moron I college, covering at least two and one ON DEGREES The College Times is published at half miles. In addition to the main Lock Haven State Teachers College, trail it will be possible to have short Degrees to the ordinary layman Lock Haven, Penna., by the Board of trails leading to still more fascinat- mean anything from the third degree ing parts of the woods near our col- to 96 degrees Fahrenheit. (Either of Editors of the College Times. lege. these degrees would indicate a hot Just the preliminary plans are spell.) There are, in addition, degrees Published weekly during school year. Subscription rate, $1.00 per annum. made; in fact, the club would wel- of longitude and latitude, v/hich have come suggestions from members out- something to do with the earth's surside of its organization. Most of the face; and the degrees in masonry, BOARD OF EDITORS which we suppose refer to brick-layEditor-in-Chief . . . . Martha Zeigler trees, shrubs, fiowers, mosses, and ing. But for we who are future disManaging Editor Fay Bittner other growths will be labeled so that Make-up Editor John Haberstroh one not trained in the facts of nature seminators of knowledge to the will learn to recognize them. It is young, the only degree that counts Alumni and Exchange Editor Margaret Beeson felt that more students would be- is the one they hand out on a sheepMen's Sports Editor . . Einar Eliason come acquainted with the ways of skin at the annual beginning exerGirls' Sports Editor . . Irene Russell nature if they had a special hill where cises. Joke Editor Sylvia Sykes they could loiter after the day's classMost of the people we know have Business Manager . . William Sweet es are over. Maybe rustic chairs or degrees or are in the process of getCirculation Manager John Haberstroh benches for the weary hikers will be ting them. This demonstrates the proconducive to a more sincere apprecia- gressive qualites of the modern Subscription Manager Elizabeth Dalby tion of the out-of-doors. young. What if we are going to the The Nature Trail is to be mapped dogs! We're going by degrees. And Staff Writers:— out, planned, and completed, then, lately we understand it has become Katherine Anderson, Anna Mary rot for members of the club only, but much easier to earn a degree. One of Gilson, Alice Read, Edith Furst, rather for some lasting contribution our professors tells us of the woman Ruth Conrady, Julia Silagyi, Hal the club can give to our college. It is who became a doctor by editing a Poust, Clyde Lynch. Elizabeth not a matter of several months until thesis on "The Comparative Values of Machtley, Albert Sundberg, QuenFour Different Processes of Dishwasht'n Wolfe, Royce Johnson, Marion it will be completed but rather several ing." We wonder if there are any Francisco, Metro Kost, Paul Bundy, years. Still the club will do its utmost Kermit Stover, Mirabelle Eliason, to at least get the plans completed possibilities in "The Value of Mangeand the main path marked out before Cure as an Eliminator of the ParasitMary Thompson. spring. It is hoped that the dedica- ical Crustacean (louse...in English)." tion can be in order on Naturaliji Typists:— Personally we feel most partial to Bernice Moran, Agnes Unverdor- Homecoming Day. the music degree, not because of any ben, Polly Barndt, Jenice Sharpe, special aptitude along that line (it Molly Hammon, Audrey Finn. being well-known that the editor is a TWO-HOUR EXAMS monotone), but because of the lovely A new experiment is being tried in I Acceptance for mailing at special pink scapulars which the music derate of postage provided for in Sec- our educational practice at Lock Ha- j greeite is permitted to wear. In case tion 1103, Act of October 3, 1917, I ven State Teachers College. Formerly you don't understand the fifty-cent authorized June 3, 1923. word in the above sentence, scapulars Entered as Second Class matter ] it was the custom for each teacher to !are those colorful shoulder-pads which November 5, 1928, at the Post Office I give a test one, two or three periods people wear in a baccalaureate proat Lock Haven, Pa., under the Act of before the end of the semester. Often I cession. You can always tell what , a term paper, a project, or some degree your favorite prof or profess March 3, 1879. other piece of scholarly work was has by noting the color of the scapuTHURSDAY, JANUARY 15, 1931 substituted. In either case what the lars.—That is, if you know which pupil did served two purposes: First, I color means what. We don't. it provided a basis for grading; and, i Having reached a high degree of second, it helped the student to see a course in its totality and to command fatigue in doing this disagreeable task a broader vision of it. This year the —i.e., enlightening the public about educational practice is being modi- degrees,, we shall conclude, fied. A committee representing the I. Q. MORON, P. H. D. BUY A PRAECO faculty investigated our local con-1 (doctor of poor humor) The recent action of the senior ditions, compared them with other! class in whole-heartedly supporting systems, and finally decided that a S. T. C. HONORED AT MEETING the Pv.-'eco this year is an entirely system of scheduled tests be inauglaudable one. During the past few urated. Under this plan the last four ((.'oiitiniu'fl from iiii^e 1) years, the lax attitude of the seniors days, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday addressed the group on "Teacher has been reflected in the other three and Saturday of the week of January classes, making the work of the Prae- 12 will be devoted to final examin- Tiaining in Pennsylvania." The third co staff doubly hard in that they were ations. In addition many teachers are lecture, "New Preparation Levels for forced not only to edit the book but requiring term papers and projects Secondary Teachers," was given by to sell it as well. After all, the Praeco and the students are responding ad- Henry Klonower, Director of Teacher : Bureau, Department of Public Inis really our own yearbook. It con- mirably. struction, Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. tains our pictures and pictures of our Under this new plan, the advantTuesday evening Dr. Frederick J. friends. It is the work of those whom ages of the old system will be retained Kelly, of the University of Chicago, we know and includes the achieve- and new ones will be added. First of explained the new system of research ments of our own college during the all, the students the longer study under which freshmen and sophperiod of our attendance. Why should period of time. Inwelcome the second j omore classmen at Chicago are to be we be unwilling to invest in a book we students can better representplace, our-' educated. According to this plan there which is so entirely a matter of inin a two hour period than we is to be no obligatory attendance at terest to ourselves? The logical th'ng selves usual fifty-minute class classes, but a comprehensive examinto do is for each underclassman to fol- could inInthe the third plan, we can de- ation will be given at the end of the low the example of the seniors and lay period. our whole time to this final piece two year research period before the aside' five dollars for the purchase of vote of work without interruption of the students enter into their Junior year the 1930 Praeco. Let's help the staff usual school and a better piece for specialization. This new system and make a worthwhile investment. of work can routine be expected. is the result of a study in students' No plea need be made to urge the opinions and judgments on the value A NATURE TRAIL students to cooperate in this plan. of college education. The Naturalist Club is this year un- The way in which they fulfill the redertaking a project—a nature trail— quirements for term papers, projects Mrs. R. Stewart MacDougal is which, when completed, will make for and essays denotes that they are in- spending some time with friends and the enjoyment and advantage of the tent on academic pursuits and a high relatives in Michigan. entire student body. The club plans to standard of general scholastic achievebegin a path directly back of the gym- ment at Lock Haven State Teachers Miss Nellie DuBois spent the Yulenasium which will continue to wind College. tide Season at her home in New York. The Time is Out of Joint By TODO TORO All the patriotic Swedes in the country have been reading "Babbitt" the past few weeks to see if they can discover the reason the folks back home donated Sinclair Lewis $46,000. The Nobels would have started much less trouble if they had placed a stick of dynamite under some of our mildewed American journalists. Half the writers in the world had their palms itching for the Dynamite Bonus. In Sweden $46,000 is equal to about 150,000 crowns which, is a young fortune. The price of dynamite will probably go up about fifteen cents a stick to get it back; and, at that rate, Chicago alone should soon make up the deficit. That's almost as bad as our chewing gum situation. Wrigley had a contest and paid a young kid a fortune for swimming the Catalina Channel; in about a week the size of a stick of Spearmint was cut down about a half an inch. What they lose on the prize they make up on the stick. * etc * L. H. T. C. Pays Lewis Regardless of what a lot of second rate professional humorists, who spend a lot of time aping Will Rogers, say about statistics, we think they often reveal a lot of interesting information. From the booming and the rock flying that took place on our new athletic field last year, we estimate (without the use of a slide rule) that we must've used about $46,000.05 worth of dynamite. According to these statistics, we, the students of L. H. T. C. are the actual donors of the 1930 Nobel prize. Now, don't go blaming it on the Swedes. You could tell that Lewis was anxious 'cause he went traipsing clear over to Sweden after his money; then he turned around and gave it away. Case No. 46. * ** Springtime and square-dancing have a lot in common; they both bring out a bunch of hidden beauties. Thomas Gray, in his clever little elegy in a farmer's cemetery, surely spoke the truth when he said, "Full many a flower is born to blush unseen and waste its sweetness on the desert air." If it hadn't been for the square dance last Saturday night, we would never have known that we had.such a swarm of hidden beauties on our campus. liBt's have some more of 'em. His Only One The Butcher: "I don't like to play golf because I bring too much of my business into it." Partner: "What's that?" "Slicing." Urgent "I see, miss, that you have had letters marked urgent on your desk for three days." "That's quite right—they become more urgent every day." Why Not? He (teaching her to drive) : "In case of emergency, the first thing you want to do is to put on the brake." She: "Why I thought it came with the car." COLLEGE TIMES Among the Plots CAMPUS CHATTER CH>!KHKH>OI>^^ T H E MODERN T O O T H PASTE CAMPAIGNS T o o t h p a s t e a d v e r t i s i n g is so extensive in this day and age t h a t it is impossible e v e n to a t t e m p t to fl.gure out a possible new n a m e for a b r a n d . Among t h e kinds on the m a r k e t a r e : 1, the i n g r e d i e n t toothpastes, Pepsodent and Listerine; 2, the familyname ones, Squibb's and C o l g a t e ' s ; 3, the foreign sounding ones, F o r h a n ' s and I p a n a ; 4, the multiple choice kind, l o d e n t No. 1 and No. 2. Of all these b r a n d s probably Listerine leads the way in the near-perfection type of advertising. It touches the Scotch in its economy a p p e a l ; t h e men by suggest'.ng t h e purchase of a u t o accessories with the money saved; and the women by pointing o u t the j o y s of buying j e w e l r y and hosiery with this same money. In addition, it .(guarantees to overcome entirely t h a t condition which even your best friend will not m e n t i o n . However m o s t of these little please-buy-my-wares advertisem e n t s fail to mention t h e fact t h a t their p a r t i c u l a r p r o d u c t tastes like r a t poison. I found t h a t out for myself in a number of c a s e s ; so perhaps I'll t r y using Colgates, which .according to the latest bulletin has been accepted by the Council on Dental Therapeutics of the A m e r i c a n Dental Association. T h e a n n o y a n c e of t h i s advertising campai.^n to me personally is t h a t it keejis me in a constant state of unc e r t a i n t y as to what particular kind I rhotild use. In an endeavor to save money, to g u a r d t h e d a n g e r line, and to escape from t h e four out of five classification, I have besome hopelessly entangled. This vacillating condition has annoyed me terribly and I suspect t h a t in due t i m e I thall ret u r n to n a t u r e ' s own remedy, t h e surefire, inexpensive substance—fait. Exchange Notes The Mill on the Floss, George Eliot; Bob E m e r y in g e o g r a p h y class inWe'd like t o k n o w how some A novel, typical of George Eliot, full sists upon talking a n d a t times ad- people's chests feel a f t e r t h e big un- of h u m a n appeal, and conforming to t h e most accepted principles of a r t is loading the other night. m i t s he g e t s his mix all talked u p . * ** " T h e Mill on t h e F l o s s . " As usual * ** B e t t y and M a r i a n n e a r e going in George E l i o t is v e r y discriminate in Tony had a good excuse for going h e r delineations of c h a r a c t e r and as a t o J o h n s o n b u r g h b u t he had a b e t t e r for t h e p u r c h a s e of bread knives and r e s u l t her c h a r a c t e r s a r e well-drawn such. excuse in stopping off a t St. M a r y s and exquisitely chiselled. George Eliot ' d u r i n g t h e holidays. c r e a t e s for us c e r t a i n c h a r a c t e r s — Some people have a h a b i t of w e a r - Maggie Tulliver, Tom Tulliver, Lucy, ing their C h r i s t m a s gifts a t all times. We h e a r a lot of r e d u c i n g , say the Stephen, A u n t Glegg and o t h e r s — a n d boys, especially when t h e girls g e t in Ah-h-h-h, t h i s constancy, t h i s fidelity! a f t e r she h a s created t h e m , she never t h e roorn above and s t a r t j u m p i n g allows t h e m for s e n t i m e n t a l purposes The best way to keep your new t o act f o r e i g n to t h e i r n a t u r e . F o r exrope. y e a r ' s resolution is to publish it in ample, Maggie Tulliver's s t r o n g e s t Second floor east h a s a new g a m e C a m p u s C h a t t e r and then you w o n ' t emotions a r e powerful enough to a l t e r called Hall Tennis. I t ' s a cross be- be able to fall down on t h e j o b . A n y h e r affection for him. George Eliot's tween p i n g pong, hockey, polo, and t i m o r o u s w a v e r i n g resolvers may h a n d c h a r a c t e r s a r e n o t p r u d i s h ; they a r e irr t h e i r r e s o l u t i o n s with n a m e at- c o u r a g e o u s , strong, a n d v i r t u o u s . dodge ball. tached. A d d r e s s C a m p u s C h a t t e r EdArtistically, " T h e Mill on the F l o s s " Ask E r n i e R e u t h e r a b o u t Kay Gor- itor, Times Room. is a well balanced unit. George Eliot m a n ' s medieval e v e n i n g gown. These t w o - h o u r e x a m s a r e the m o s t w r o t e in a period of English l i t e r a r y history in which artistic form was emWe imagine one of our college men o u t s t a n d i n g cause of the leap frog phasized. T h e whole p l o t c e n t e r s g a m e s on 3 r d W e s t after dark. I t ' s might solve a social problem if his a b o u t one overwhelming force, a mill Utopia worked out. Orrie believes t h a t like t h i s — e v e r y b o d y hauls his t a b l e on the r i v e r Floss. I t is this mill t h a t o u t in the hall and t h e poor soul who r o m a n c e begins a f t e r m a r r i a g e . We causes t h e t u r n in the Tulliver fora r e w o n d e r i n g how he found t h a t out. wishes to go up the hall m u s t go over t u n e s ; it is the s t r u g g l e to regain t h e or under. mill t h a t moulds Tom into t h e egotisBill: One night a girl kissed me and tical, self-righteous and u n i m a g i n a Speaking of exams, we wish t h a t I rushed r i g h t home a n d s t a r t e d growtive person t h a t he b e c o m e s ; it is this t h ' s week would suddenly drop out of ing a m u s t a c h e . mill on t h e Floss t h a t finally overthe cabmdar. N o r m a n : W a s t h a t the f e r t i l i z e r ? whelms t h e brother and sister, T o m and Maggie, in d e a t h . Still s p e a k i n g of exams, t h e t h e m e Royce J o h n s o n w a s awfully a n x i o u s P a r t i c u l a r l y is this story e n t e r t a i n song of t h e week is t h a t p a r o d y on to inform the Times m e m b e r s t h a t J a c k had said an "illustrious predeces- KipHng's R e c e s s i o n a l — " l e s t we for- ing for its h u m a n appeal. We all h a v e worshipped someone a t some time o r s o r " instead of an " i l l i t e r a t e " one. g e t . " etc * He other in o u r lives as Maggie worshipWonder if Royce w a s worried a b o u t ped Tom. Maggie's father, Mr. TulToo bad w e c a n ' t have a v a c a t i o n his educational s t a t u s . b e t w e e n s e m e s t e r s . W e certainly need | liver, is b o t h pathetic and a m u s i n g i n * ** a bit of r e c u p e r a t i o n after these last 1 his insistence t h a t W a k e m , t h e lawSome people t h i n k t h e t e a c h e r s few days. I yer, is a " r a s h i l l . " Most typically Vichave a kind of magical power over the He * * j t o r i a n and e x t r e m e l y a m u s i n g to us is mind. One girl asked Mr. Williams Ev wishes to t a k e this o p p o r t u n i t y 1 t h e philosophy of t h e Dodson family. t h e other day w h a t h e could do a b o u t to tell the public t h a t she has p u t And how earnestly we s y m p a t h i z e h e r spelling. M a r k ' s l e t t e r s in a safety deposit box. i with Maggie when she falls in love with S t e p h e n and how satisfied w e * ** J u d g i n g from the events of t h e past i feel when she has t h e courage t o r e We w o n d e r who s e n t Floyd Bloom nounce him! t h e card from Dubois. The boys mus>t v.eek it seems as if quite a few of t h e ; g-irls decided on the "boy back h o m e . " j bp.vo become a c q u a i n t e d on those football t r i p s ! It looked like a bachelor's convenMetro K o s t c e r t a i n l y b u r n e d up t h e tion a t t h e station S u n d a y night j u s t E v e r y o n e in A m e r i c a n g o v e r n m e n t class is terribly anxious to know why mail b e t w e e n Smoke Run and J o h n - before the nine-fifteen t r a i n came in. Hall and Betty both h a p p e n e d to s o n b u r g d u r i n g t h e Christmas vaca- The c o n v t n t ' o n lasted two hours b e cause the t r a i n w a s late. choase city g o v e r n m e n t for the c h a r t . t ' o n . Ask E d n a . :Sc cl: :1: cjc 4c He cic cl. CH * * etc * cle ci: * He * H: He * He He clc He He He He He cH He He c^ * :1c cH cl: SIC Bloomsburg State Teachers College w a s authorized this fall by t h e Dep a r t m e n t of Public Instruction to ina u g u r a t e a course for t h e teaching of T h e r e w a s no need for Stacy to r u n Shively: Why t h e new clothes, C o m m e r c i a l Subjects. This is a four t h r o u g h t h e coaches with a red lany e a r course and leads t o a Bachelor H a m m a k e r ? H a m m a k e r : The m o t h s got in my ' t e r n in his h a n d on this r e t u r n t r i p . of Science in Education degree, and T h e coaches were lighted this t ' m e . p r e p a r e s students to teach commercial other coat. N o t e : Two hours later, H a m m y and s u b j e c t s in high schools. About thirtyI We d o n ' t know how Glenn A d a m s five s t u d e n t s enrolled in the first year Nancy w e r e seen a t t h e Roxy. spent his C h r i s t m a s vacation b u t a of t h e course this fall. S h o r t y : How did you break this few days later, one evening a b o u t The Alumni Quarterly. four-thirty, he w a s r u n n i n g a r o u n d egg, Boney? B o n e y : Didn't you ever know chick- in a t u x e d o h u n t i n g for either a r a z o r U n d e r t h e heading of Borrowed ens lay cracked eggs? or a pair of scissors. W i s d o m t h e following sayings have been copied: T h e r e m u s t be some a t t r a c t i o n a t Red Cowf?r is going in for t e l l i n g ! P e o p l e a n d pins ure useless when Mother Goose Tales. Lock H a v e n for M a r y Steiner. She t h e y lose t h e i r heads. had to come back to spend New Y e a r ' s Do n o t tell w h a t you are going to Orrie Lovell and Stacy G u n d e r m a n , h e r e . do u n t i l you h a v e done it. noted globe t r o t t e r s and explorers, The A n n e x would like to know who J u m p i n g a t conclusions is a b o u t the circumnavigated the t u n n e l u n d e r the k r o c k e d down t h e i r snow m a n Satonly m e n t a l exercise some people football field Sunday afternoon. u r d a y night. Ask Dick Herlocher. take. G r e a t w o r k s a r e performed not by Calvin Cooke had a hard t i m e deAl F o d g e knows something a b o u t s t r e n g t h b u t by p e r s e v e r a n c e . ciding whether to buy a Christmas P u r p l e and Gold. present for " A l " or to come back long strips of blue, yellow and g r e e n paper, b u t she w o n ' t tell w h a t it's all next semester. a b o u t j u s t now. " W h a t t w o t h i n g s a r e helping manIt's all right to have a dog to carkind to g e t up m o s t ? " Ted R o b b s p e n t most of his vaca" T h e a l a r m clock a n d t h e step-lad- r y your books for you. Snare, b u t you must t r a i n the dog to do the follow- tion in J o h n s t o w n . We c a n ' t imagine der." , ^ iwhy! ing. The Sky-Rocket. * etc cic clc etc etc cH etc I * cf: SIC I He He He cii He He « etc ccc ! * He He He He He =1 The S t r o u d Courtier is full of t h e saying " S u p p o r t t h e Y e a r b o o k . " T h ' s ; same p h r a s e can become t h e c a m p u s i pass word here, too. H e r e is the consolation: their yearbook is six d o l l a r s ; so you save one dollar by a t t e n d i n g L. H. S. T. C. i ,;.0»i»CJI>!:'rOOaat,ftotrSH>CK>CK>aCHKH>0^>^XH>^KKK^^